My wife was just diagnosed.

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rustycolts
rustycolts Member Posts: 3
edited December 2018 in Just Diagnosed

All of this is just overwhelming to me so I'm sure my wife is twice as overwhelmed and scared as I am. Any information that you guys can share would be much appreciated.

The oncologist said that there were multiple spots. That she was stage 1 grade 2 aggression sensitive to estrogen. HER2 was negative. IHS test was 0. Her hormone receptor tests were positive. She hasn't had lymh nodes checked yet they will do that during the surgery any feed back you can give would be much appreciated.

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  • YoungTurkNYC
    YoungTurkNYC Member Posts: 334
    edited December 2018

    Rusty,

    It sounds like it was caught early, and based on the description you gave above, the cancer has favorable characteristics (such as it will likely be responsive to hormonal therapy). So, these are all good news.


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  • AliceBastable
    AliceBastable Member Posts: 3,461
    edited December 2018

    My hubby has been great by going to appointments with me to be my second eyes and ears and remind me if I forgot a question. Two things he did I did NOT like (and I let him know it): when I got the news that I had another unrelated but rather scary diagnoses in the middle of the whole breast cancer thing, he got a bit emotional in the doctor's office. I kinda bit his head off since I was trying to stay on top of the information I needed, and his moaning and trying to rub my shoulder were NOT helpful. And early in my cancer diagnoses, he started asking the doctor questions that were on my list, like I wasn't even there. I wanted him to remind me, not ignore me. But relationship balances vary and you may be a different kind of couple.

    The other thing was I turned over all the insurance and financial stuff to him. It gave him something practical to do and left me with one less thing to deal with.

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  • rustycolts
    rustycolts Member Posts: 3
    edited December 2018

    Thanks Alice. I was reminded by my wife after the doctors visit that I didn't give her time to ask her own questions. I kind of jumped the gun so I am going to back off during the visits and only ask things that she may forget or overlook. I just want to be as helpful as I can.

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  • Georgia1
    Georgia1 Member Posts: 1,321
    edited December 2018

    Hi there Rusty. As YoungTurk pointed out, grade1 is scary of course but pretty manageable. The likely courses presented will be 1) lumpectomy + radiation or 2) masectomy. Then either likely to be followed by a daily anti-estrogen pill. The surgical choice is probably going to be emotional and difficult for your wife, so being supportive is important. So is helping her take this journey one step at a time.

    For practical advice you might want to order a copy of "Navigating Breat Cancer" written by a former nurse. It's short, clear and very helpful.

    Another tip is that this is also very exhausting! So encourage her to sleep and try to help out with chores and cooking. Trying to "do it all" is common but rest is best.

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  • rustycolts
    rustycolts Member Posts: 3
    edited December 2018

    Thank you Georgia. My wife also has MS so I already do most of the cooking and cleaning. I do pretty good at the cooking but I am afraid much to my wifes chagrin I'm more of a surface cleaner but better than nothing. I am encouraging her to get as much rest as possible. Thanks so much for the reply. I am going to read through these and let her know what I have learned.

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  • Wised
    Wised Member Posts: 351
    edited December 2018

    Rusty, your wife is lucky! If you check my signature, you can see that I have a similar diagnosis as your wife. It's been tough, I'm not gonna lie, but the toughest part is what goes on in my head. Make sure you get a good breast surgeon who understands your wife's MS and complications that could arise. The same goes for the oncologist and radiologist. Some of the drugs/treatments could worsen her symptoms. If you don't like a doctor, or he doesn't answer your questions, move on to the next one. Maybe the doc that treats her MS could refer you to doctors he knows. Hugs to you and your wife!

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited December 2018

    Hi there, Rusty! We know it's all a bit overwhelming, but you've come to the right place for guidance, and we hope that this community can be a source of support for you both as you head down this road together.

    The Mods

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  • Traveltext
    Traveltext Member Posts: 2,089
    edited December 2018

    Rusty, you should try to be at all your wife's medical meetings to take notes and listen carefully. Being a patient advocate means you'll follow all aspects of treatment and ensure that her voice is heard and her wishes respected during all stages of her treatment. Best wishes to you both.


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  • dtad
    dtad Member Posts: 2,323
    edited December 2018

    rustycolts...so sorry you guys are going through this.Your wife is very lucky to have you. IMO its very important to be treated at a major university teaching hospital, especially with your wife's MS diagnosis. Also always remember your choice of treatment options is ultimately yours and your wifes, not your doctors. That being said of course the professional opinions should be seriously considered. I know what its like to have a serious medical condition when being diagnosed with BC. It will affect some of the decisions that you will make. Good luck. We are all here for you.

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  • msphil
    msphil Member Posts: 1,536
    edited December 2018

    hello there I was diagnosed while making wedding plans for our 2nd marriages idc stage2 0/3 nodes Lmast 3mo chemo before and after got married then 7wks of rads and 5yrs on Tamoxifen. I am now a 24yr Survivor Praise God. Tell her hang in there stay Positive keep Hope is what We did husband and I he was my rock strong when I got a little weak. Stay strong for her. msphil

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