Just diagnosed with IDC

Hi Robyn, I just wanted to give you a little pep talk, and some encouragement. You are right now in the scariest part of finding out you have cancer, but not knowing what to expect. In the next few days and weeks you'll get all the tests and scans etc that will help you and your doctor's formulate your plan of action Once you know your plan, you will be able to calm down and get into fighter mode.Weve all been where you are now, I'm sure lots of women here will answer you with information and support!💖 When I first got diagnosed i didnt know what to do! I was in a panic. For the first time in my life, I had to take anxiety meds, Xanax is what my Dr gave me. It helped! After your appt with surgeon on weds, let us know here what you find out. Someone here will have your same diagnosis, and can help you through it. Just know, in the end, you'll be FINE😚💖💖😉I'm doing GREAT and my cancer was pretty advanced.

Just wanted to thank and affirm CaliKelly’s great note. Right now is, and also was for me, the most anxiety-producing part. I couldn’t even think beyond the word CANCER, and my primary care doctor was of very little help.

But when I sat down with the surgeon, that gentleman was OUTSTANDING. He gave me a sense of calm, and he answered every question I had. He was smart enough to give info I had not even asked for, but which he knew would come to my mind. Knowing he had a plan for me gave me the confidence to go forward, and after that meeting I was able to focus on the plan, knowing I would get the help I needed.

He was with me every step of the way, as were the two oncologists that joined what became my cancer team. Their collective skill, compassion, and support meant the world to me. Still do

So shall it be for you, and one day you will be responding to another woman in the same way that others will respond to you. Know and believe that it will be all right.

If it helps you, take another person you trust into the appointment with you. Sometimes that second set of ears and eyes can retain info that you may miss. (I didn’t have anyone to accompany me, so I went myself). Good doctors are used to that and will readily accommodate you.

Offering you strength and support.

Hi Robyn! I sent you a message, but in the meantime, look at It this way, tomorrow at your meeting with the surgeon you will be getting information. With that info you will be on your way to attacking the cancer, eliminating it, and getting back to normal life. Seems so scary right now, because it's all unknown. You've never had to be in this position before. It's all going to be Ok!

I'm glad you're taking the meds that can help get through this excruciating time. I guess that you will feel better after the meeting with the doctor tomorrow.

Do you have a therapist to work with you through this? If not, taking some time try to find one today could be a good and distracting use of time.

Hi Robyn,

Where are you located? Can you get a second opinion? My understanding is that lumpectomy+radiation is the standard of treatment for early stage tumors, and I'd want to really understand why the doctors are recommending you a mastectomy. (There may be excellent reasons, but it would be helpful to know them). Was it HER+ maybe? Or do you have a genetic mutation?

Tamoxifen is very standard treatment for hormone receptor positive cancers. There is a lot of evidence for it making a significant difference in terms of long term disease-free and survival. The rate of truly bad side effects (like uterine cancer) is very low. There are a lot of threads on here with women talking about their experiences on tamoxifen. From what I can tell, some women don't have side effects or even feel better. Some have very bad side effects. There is no way to know which you'll be but to try. I'm going to be starting soon. If I did have very bad side effects, I would ask my doc about moving to ovarian suppression plus an AI, just in case the experience was better for me (even though the side effect profile is generally worse for premenopausal woman, again, no way to know but to try).

I'm a single woman going through this with support of friends but mostly on my own. I'm really glad to chat with you when helpful. I've also found some social work resources very useful, including through my hospital, through my union, and through a cultural group. Just people to talk with who know other people who have been there.

Hang in there! Do you have nice plans for Thanksgiving?

mastectomy wasn't bad. Sure your sore, but i wasn't in dire pain. Honestly i have have ZERO side effect on tamoxifen, not one. And i have 3 friends on tamoxifen as well, they have had no side effects either. I got myself all worked up thinking i was going to be a mess on the meds. And nothing ever happened. As for scans, im not sure yet, im only 3 months out. My nodes looked clear on my scans and they remained that way. Before surgery they said i was stage 1, grade1. No nodes. My diagnosis was exactly the same after surgey. You will be OK. Trust me.

Do any of you attend any support groups? I’m about 40 minutes west of Philadelphia.