Starting Chemo in JAN 2007
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Robbinjaye, your hair looks great!
I finally gave up on Friday and got my head shaved. So far people (friends and family) have said that I remind them of either:
GI Jane
V for Vendetta
Aliens 3
I'm almost looking forward to the stubble falling out, it feels like I'm wearing velcro on my head which gets annoying after a while of wearing either a bandanna or wig.
More retail therapy today (shopping with sister!) and then tomorrow is my 2nd FEC so I will be offline for a few days.
I wish everyone good luck over the next few days! -
Pop in any time Mena...........and as for Mizsissy, it would be pretty hard NOT to like her! You have a good friend!!!
Hey ladies, I am leaving the big "C" behind today and going to Peoria to the riverboat for the afternoon. I expect to come back rich and famous! :-)
Have a great Sunday.
Rita -
Aladora........shopping is always good therapy, especially if there is a sale in progress! Have fun today!
Good luck tomorrow. We will be thinking about you and hoping for the best. As soon as you're up to it, pop back on and check in so we know how you're doing.
Rita -
Nandy....we're glad that you found us, too! I just noticed that you are from Missouri. What part of Missouri are you in? My son went to college at Rolla........(UMR..school of mines and engineering) and was in a 5 year program so I made lots of trips there over the years. It's beautiful country in that area. Then of course, we always get into St. Louis a few times every year for a ballgame (especially a Cards/Cub game since we are Cubbie fans) or for a weekend away.
Hang in there....we still have some good days ahead of us this week and we can console each other this next weekend if we're feeling puny after #2. Then again, we can always celebrate, too if we're feeling pretty good!.
Rita -
I had hubby shave my head this morning. I got tired of hair everywhere. Now it feels like sandpaper.
That aside.. am I the only one that's beginning to see wrinkles? I know I've lost some weight, but I'm seeing way too many face wrinkles, too fast!
It has me wondering about dehydration. -
Hey Rita,
Good luck this afternoon! We went about 8 years ago when we lived in St. Joseph Il. I had set my hundred dollar limit but hit 2600 on a slot machine! Of course everyone in our party thought they should share my good fortune. Enjoy your afternoon.
Terry 4 Tae. -
Nandy - I had thrush and my onc nurse had a Rx called in for me. It got rid of it very quickly.
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Rita - check to see if any nearby grocery stores have online shopping. I hate grocery shopping. Here I can order everything on line and just pull up out front to have it loaded in my car. Just for $5 extra - well worth it for me. Other places I've lived had online grocery shopping with home delivery.
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My nose has been really dried out inside too. I've been putting a little aquaphor on the worst parts and it seems to take care of it.
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Aladora - good luck with FEC #2 tomorrow. My second is on Friday and I am dreading it. Hope you had a great time shopping.
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Brenda_D
Yes, the sandpaper thing is absolutely dreadful. I hate the stubble and am doing everything I can to get rid of it. Someone on the thread suggested a sticky-roller to help get the stubble off, and I have been using one, and it works great, even if I feel a bit silly doing it.
Wrinkle-wise, I discovered that gettting a good rich moisturizer does wonders for keeping your skin smooth, and getting rid of that awful pulling feeling (my skin got very dry toward the end of my first cycle. I bought Loreal Hydra-renewal, and it was such a relief!
If nothing else this whole experience is enough to give you a few wrinkles. My reconstruction surgeon is already saying he wants to stick me with botox to get rid of the worry lines between my brows! haha -
RSheehy, I'm finding that the stubble is helping keep my scarf in place. One good thing!
I'll have to get a good face moisturizer. I never had to use one before because my skin tends to be oily.
Also on another note, I put some Anbesol on the canker sore/ mouth sores and it helps. Maybe I can eat something without being in too much pain.
I'll ask the Onc for some Magic Mouthwash, next Wed. -
Quote:
RSheehy, I'm finding that the stubble is helping keep my scarf in place. One good thing!
Always look at the bright side! That sharp stubble sticking up through the fabric really does make the scarf stay put. -
Hi Ladies,
Day 3 from round 2 and boy am I'm crashing like crazy. Went to bed at 8 last night, got up at 9:30 this morning, back in bed at 11 and just got up at 3:30. Yikes. Can't seem to sleep enough.
Regarding weight. I have the opposite problem. I seem to have the appetite after the first 2 days. They weigh me at the Onc visit and I gained 4 pounds in 3 weeks! Guess I'm doing a bit too much comfort food.
My nose is really dry too. Some blood there when I blow it.
Aldora, good luck tomorrow, we'll be thinking about you!
Lynn -
Lynn, glad you were able to get some sleep. I am waiting for the big crash tomorrow but maybe I'll escape it this time. First time today I haven't felt sickish. I am wondering if Compazene does any good. Eating a little seems to help more than the drugs at this point.
Re: weight gain. I couldn't believe I'd lost last time. I was not at all watching what I ate. I think I was stress eating a lot before round 1 and am now back to where I was. Don't think I have shrunk any. I'm now feeling the steroid bloat. That's sure odd. One day I cannot get my pants zipped, and the next they won't stay up.
Ventured out to the grocery store today with my scarf for the first time. I got a lot of double takes (was trying really hard not to notice people's reactions--or maybe there weren't any and I'm just being paranoid) but mostly got smiles. No uncomfortable looks or sad faces thank God. I just went on my way and shopped. Although I have to say that scarves without hair look a hell of a lot different than with. Even on all my practice scarf tying tryouts I didn't look like a bowling ball in a hat. I sure do now.
Anyone else hate wearing anything on their heads? I will have to get used to this. I am not brave enough to go comando but these hats and scarves are for the birds.
Amera -
Hi all,
Amera, I had to laugh when I read your bowling ball metaphor. I feel the same way. You pinned it on the nail though. The turbans and hats are a give away, but they sure are more comfortable than the wig, especially around the house. I feel bad for my husband having to see me this way. I know he is fine with it, but I still feel a little self conscious.
Some of my friends at work can be a bit overly dramatic. They give me a big hug and tell me that I am strong. I know they mean well, but I would rather be treated normal.
Eating did relieve the nausea for me also. I ate lot and did not gain any weight. I feel good about eating whatever I want and not gaining. A little treat in all this stuff!
Lynn, it is good you can sleep. Your body needs it. Hopefully you will feel better tomorrow.
Rebecca, Ilene, Melia, How are you doing?
Terry, How is Tae feeling?
Gotta go watch "Desperate Housewives"
I hope you all have a good night. -
Boy was it hard to go out in a scarf for the first time! I still hate my wig and have decided to try to go without it. I'm just doing scarves/bandanas so far. I don't want to pretend I have hair, maybe that's weird. My first outing was to my daughters day care - where a lot of the staff didn't know (I guess they do now). No one mentioned it - which was weird. I talked to at least 5 people before I got out the door.
Last night we had a babysitter and went out to dinner. I was a bit chicken to go to our regular restaurant where all the waitresses know us. I didn't want to deal with any pity looks. So we went to the place where my brother works. It was packed - tons and tons of people. I was really self conscious at first but over it by the time we left. The funny part is that several of the waitresses heard I was there and asked my brother where I was. He said "oh, she's easy to spot - the only one here with a scarf on her head." They said they hadn't noticed me. So he goes "well her husband is tall and asian" so they said "oh, we noticed him." I guess as long as I'm with my cutie no one will notice me! Ha! -
Hi all,
I am feeling much better today; round 2 of a/c was Wed, and Friday and Sat I just wanted to sleep, but wasn't sick, so feel very lucky. Today I felt good, ran a few errands, did a bit in the yard. I am glad to be halfway thru a/c. It is the scariest thing I have ever done, absolutely.
I wear the wig to work and out on errands, hats at home. My daughter knitted me a soft blue one, which is my fav, and I wear it all the time around the house. I don't mind the wig; in fact, it looks better than my real hair, but I cannot wait to have my hair back again. My daughter is getting married in Oct and I am afraid I will still be wearing the wig then, since I don't finish taxol until late june. Oh well, in the overall scheme of things, that's not too bad I guess!
Sleep well all, and have a good week. I am always sad to see the weekend end.
Melia -
After I got my head shaved on Friday I bought a bandanna and just wore it. My sister and I went shopping afterwards and yeah, people looked but who cares? We just made a lot of jokes and carried on. I figure that I'm going to be bald for a while so I might as well get used to it! In fact, if it wasn't so bloody cold out, I would give up and go bare headed. Ask me again after the stubble falls out and I might tell a different story! But right now with the stubble, hats, scarves, bandannas and wigs are uncomfortable. I was out all afternoon Friday, all day Saturday and Sunday and wore a bandanna for most of the time. We went out for dinner last night to a nice restaurant so I wore my wig and it looked so natural that an old friend who I hadn't seen in years didn't even notice! Of course, it was a male friend so he might not have noticed if I wasn't wearing the wig either!
So, the ugly hat is off to its fifth destination. Victoria BC, Yellowknife NWT, Oshawa Ont, Ottawa Ont and now it is headed to Norway! This hat is going to be better traveled than many people I know! After Norway it is heading on the US tour where it is going to make approximately 35 stops in 22 States!
All the best to everyone for the next few days!
Susan -
Good morning everyone
Watched another sunrise this morning (gorgeous), and actually enjoyed it because I (gasp) slept pretty well last night except for waking up feeling like I had a wad of cotton in my mouth (yeck). I feel totally dessicated. I felt pretty good yesterday for most of the day...went out for some shopping with the kids (they had gift cards to Disney from the holidays!) and then just hung around. I hit the wall at about 7:30, and shut down but all things considered I think I did pretty well. Like you, Amera, I am waiting for the big crash. Except for the Neulasta slam I have done pretty well this time. Maybe it is because I spent so much time sleeping during the first two days (I felt like I was hibernating)
As far as weight goes I have pretty much held steady. last cycle I lost weight at the start, and then gained it back in the last week. I seem to be going along the same pattern right now. I am down a pound or two. nothing big.
Viddie do not think you are strange for not wanting to "pretend to have hair"! I feel exactly the same way. I have had to beat off well-meaning friends and family with a STICK as they try to convince me to wear a wig. I actually like my scarves and I have had many compliments. I am a teacher, so I am constantly on display...so trust me when I say that people get used to it. I also try to distract people by wearing very striking scarves, so they stare at the scarf rather than wonder what is UNDER it. My favorite way to wear one results in a "bun" at the back of the neck. If you want to know how, check out the video at Janasbandanas.com.
As far as being stared at...strangely I have felt like I have CANCER printed in large letters on my forhead since my diagnosis. I feel like I have been stared at since then, and it has nothing to do with my scarf. Honestly, I think that most people do not notice the scarf.
The only thing about the scarf is that when you see people that you know, you have to explain. THAT is the part I hate the most. I hate laying the bummer news on people, and I hate telling the same ugly story over and over. The only plus side is that I have gotten about 3 of my female friends who have never gotten mammograms to get one (do it for me...pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeze) not that it did me any good .
Well anyway, off to work today....my fresh faced students await. I have a long day today...I hope my energy holds out.
Have a lovely day everyone....you are the best, and you are all gorgous! I am so glad I found this list...it makes this all much easier to bear. -
Hey, it sounds like everyone is bouncing back nicely. That is a wonderful wake-up this morning.
I didn't crash! I was so convinced I would. I am sleepy but nothing, nothing like last time when I couldn't get off the couch. Thank goodness for Atavan is all I can say. This from someone who didn't like to take Tylenol before!
Oh my Rebecca, I forgot you taught. It's pre-school right? Yipes. Those kids have a lot of energy. I did an integrated preschool/kindergarten for years and loved it but boy, was I worn out at the end of the day. Hope you can hang in there. Nothing like 4/5 year olds to get your mind off yourself.
Okay, have to do something with this energy I have. Hope everyone else is doing well.
Amera -
Today will be my first venture out "while being bald". I get to go get stuck for blood work.
I'll have to see how many stares the scarf draws.
I'm not brave enough to go out commando. I already think I look like Uncle Fester, I don't need conformation.
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Hey Amera,
Well, it is more or less the same thing as preschool, but I actually teach college. They do not always have a lot of energy at 9:30AM, but they whine just as much as my 4 year old at home does. -
I totally agree about the hats. I can feel a lot of people looking at me when I go outside. It's kind of like, does she or does she not have cancer. I don't care. It's not something to be ashamed of. When I'm in the house, I prefer to have nothing on my head. My husband likes to rub his hand through my stubbles. I used to do that to my son. The fun really starts when the doorbell goes and I forget to put on a hat. I have seen some startled looks, ha!
I haven't started losing my hair yet, but tomorrow is day 14. It's also my second chemo. My doctor called yesterday. She doesn't want to see me today, which will save her and me time. I'll just do the bloodwork, and then she will visit me during my chemo. Sounds nice to me. -
Whoops, sorry Rebecca. Where did I get that idea? How's the chemo fog while you're teaching? I'm still having a hard time putting together a sentence or reading anything longer than a line or two.
Amera -
Good morning everybody! I guess I will keep my tutoring job as I didn't win big like T & Tae did when they went to the riverboat! I played most of the afternoon though on the money I had taken and still came home with some so guess it was a good day out of the house. Gosh if I ever won $2600 I'd be afraid to cross the parking lot with it at the end of the day!!!! Wonderful! Is Tae still doing O.K. this time?
Congratulations Amera, Jan and Aladora on your maiden voyages with your scarfs or wigs! YEAH! Now you're ready to continue your outings. I imagine that the first time out is the worst! And Jan....I think you should definitely keep that "cutie" of yours! lol
Aladora, hope you got the good "vibes" that I sent your way for today and the next few days! Soon you'll have another one we can mark off the charts! Hang in there!
Melia...so glad you are feeling better. Isn't it nice to wake up in the morning and not feel nauseous?
Rebecca...loved your comment on the college kids and their maturity level. I taught JH for 33 years so fully understand where you're coming from. How many classes do you teach and in what subject areas?
Viddie.....I love those "Desperate Housewives" too. What do you think they are going to do with Bree since she is pregnant in real life?
Well, Illinois is gearing up for another snow attack later this afternoon and evening so I need to go into town this morning and grab some rewards for my Wednesday night youth group at church and I need to get some more cat food as somebody dropped off a poor cat in the country and it's found its way to my door and I'm too much of a softie!
Good luck tomorrow, Ina. I will be thinking about you and hoping for the best.
Take care everybody!
Rita -
Honestly Amera there is little difference between preschoolers and freshmen, so I can see where the confusion comes in.
Chemo fog only gets me when someone asks me a question out of left field. When I teach I go to a "place" it is almost like meditation. I stand in front of the class and I just do it...stand up comedy and all. I keep waiting for it to fall apart, but so far so good. I also did a LOT of pre-planning for the semester, and that helps a lot too. I do not think I would be doing so well if I had to give up my teaching.
On the other hand, my chemo fog OUTSIDE of teaching is so bad that I can not read a novel or follow a television show. I think at this point it is habit that is keeping me going. It is a good thing I keep that crazy teacher locked down inside my brain somewhere so she can come out and teach my classes for me. -
Good morning Ritajean!
Sorry to hear that you did not win big, but I am glad you had a great time.
I honestly do think that college kids are equivalent to preschoolers....I took them to the library last Thursday (day after my chemo) and you should have HEARD the whining!
"Do I haaaaaaaaaaaaaave to stay?"
"I did this laaaaaaaaaast year"
Ugh. I just sent them away....like I just spent three hours being poisoned the night before and I was high on three different anti-nasea meds. :-)
Anyway to answer your question right now I am teaching freshman english composition. I typically teach developmental reading skills and sometimes I teach World Literature. I wound up with three classes this semester, which is a lot, but it keeps me out of trouble.
well off I go....talk to you all later! (for real this time) -
On the hats and scarves, I find the hats easiest and most comfortable. If you look for sales in the big stores, you can acquire a lot of cute ones in different colors to match outfits. Just be sure to look for ones with good coverage, that will sit low on your head. I'm having fun with adding pins and other trims. The winter knit ones are good too, and my favorites around the house are stretch fleece. My dh likes me to wear the wig when we go out together but has become accustomed to the hat look in the house. It's very cold here in Wisconsin and I'd freeze without them!
As for the sad-face, pity looks, I hate those! I try to stave them off by smiling and saying I'm doing well and I'm so grateful it was found in time and there is treatment and the chemo will be done in a few months. People seem surprised by my attitude and their expression always changes. I also tell them I posted my bald photo online if they want to see it...that gets a shocked look every time, LOL! We might as well have some fun with it, gals. - Skye -
Good Morning Everyone-- This is the begining of my second full week following my tx. I feel so good it is almost scary. Last week I found out my wbc was really low in spite of the Neulasta shot, so was told to take antibiotics and stay home. This week I am so charged with energy. I go in today to get blood work done again, so we will see what the story is but I feel it will be back to normal. Next Monday I go in for my second tx (half way done)so I am really going to take advantage of my energy this week.Still have a full head of hair,but know that won't last. Sounds like most of you had a good weekend.
Is my second tx going to hit me harder than the first ???
Nandy
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