Does anyone else find themselves getting more emotional?

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swg
swg Member Posts: 461
edited October 2018 in Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts

Ever since being diagnosed, I feel like I cry at the drop of a hat. I don't know if I feel sad about what's going on with me, and that's getting transferred to other things..or maybe it's hormonal :(

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  • Tappermom383
    Tappermom383 Member Posts: 643
    edited October 2017

    I think it's a combination of emotions, hormones and holding your breath, waiting for the news. After my lumpectomy and follow-up visit (when I got the good news of clean margins and negative nodes), I just burst into tears over lunch. My poor husband didn't know what to make of it. I think that was a release of all the pent-up emotions. Now I'm on Arimidex (anastrozole) and find myself very emotional and irritable. This gift (BC) is the gift that keeps on giving. You do one thing or take one med and then have to do something else to offset the side effects.

    But all in all, we're fortunate that we have the treatments and technology that are available to us.

    Hope you're feeling well after your surgery. Don't forget that it was major surgery - you need to pamper yourself as much as possible.

    MJ

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  • Brightness456
    Brightness456 Member Posts: 340
    edited October 2017

    Oh my gosh, me!!! I cry alone, I cry to friends and family, I cry in public. It's awful and embarrassing. Just the littlest thing will get me going. Usually I can control it so it's just wet eyes, but sometimes it really cuts loose and I can't stop the tears. I didn't cry one time at chemo, one. It's the idea of being weak and vulnerable and well, a patient. I can't stand being a patient. I don't feel like me anymore. I'm not used to being sick. I'm not used to being in a healthcare setting as a patient every week. The normal me is healthy and active and vivacious. So I cry because I don't feel like me anymore.

    Chemo ends after 4 more treatments. That's what I'm holding out hope for. Of course, then I'll have radiation, but I'm hoping that doesn't affect me the same, and I get herceptin for a year, but sincethat's only once every 3 weeks, I'm hoping that won't affect me so much either.

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  • swg
    swg Member Posts: 461
    edited October 2017

    oh sorry, I had to change my signature line..I haven't had surgery yet, because I changed surgeons. Thank goodness I did...the previous one didn't set me up for an MRI. My new one did, and now I'm waiting to find out if an area that showed up on the MRI is a SECOND TUMOR :( They did a biopsy Thursday!

    But yeah..I even cry over sad commercials. It's kind of ridiculous.

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  • swg
    swg Member Posts: 461
    edited October 2017

    Me too. Prior to this, I had one hospitalization, for a rare drug reaction. Other than that..no surgeries and no major illnesses. So all this..going in for multiple biopsies, and getting prodded and poked..ugh, I hate it. Hang in there! Sounds like you're getting top of the line treatment, and you can see the finish line :)

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  • swg
    swg Member Posts: 461
    edited October 2017

    And btw isn't Herceptin immunotherapy? The medical field is making huge strides with that. I was just reading about it in Philly Mag. Many good cancer research centers in Philly, doing important work.

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  • ElaineTherese
    ElaineTherese Member Posts: 3,328
    edited October 2017

    Hmmm, no, Herceptin is targeted therapy. It is a monoclonal antibody that blocks the signals from the overexpression of the HER2 protein that tells the cells to divide, divide, divide.

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  • notinuse
    notinuse Member Posts: 33
    edited December 2017

    Yes I have. My Oncologist has told me to be careful with pets/animals during my chemo treatment. I use to do Large Animal Vet Nursing and so I have a great love of animals and large farm animals. The other day I saw a Leonberger in the town and normally I would run over and cuddle a dog, especially when it's a favourite breed of mine. But I couldn't. Instead I proceeded to cry my eyes out in the middle of the street. Tehe. Oh well.

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  • wintersocks
    wintersocks Member Posts: 922
    edited July 2018

    A colleague at work said i was 'really ungrateful' as i expressed reluctance to go on a work 'fun day' - doing an activity that involved 'expressing myself' and 'bonding' I said i was tired and that i didn't really want to go. Really just a passing comment.i mentioned i have a lot of arm pain at the moment .

    She said 'what makes you think you are so special'? . I mentioned i have cancer ( not that that makes me 'special)' and she rolled her eyes and made some comment like 'yeah well we will just have to disagree'

    Stunned


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  • edwards750
    edwards750 Member Posts: 3,761
    edited July 2018

    OMG that is the most insensitive remark ever. What is her problem? That is so cruel and mean spirited. It’s appalling how some people react and the comments they make. Who would want to bond with her anyway?

    Diane

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited July 2018

    Good grief! What an insensitive statement. It makes you wonder if people even think before they open their mouths.

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  • wintersocks
    wintersocks Member Posts: 922
    edited July 2018

    My boss has raised it with her and told her to 'reflect on her behavior' Apparently she said; she did not know where the words came from (out of her mouth!) It's like she angry I have cancer. The thing is i hardly ever mention it. I am also her senior. imagine rolling your eyes when someone with cancer says they are tired...

    I am not a fan of those 'fun' days at work, they are usually anything but. I just want to go home and rest after being at work all week .Seriously it all really upset me.

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  • edwards750
    edwards750 Member Posts: 3,761
    edited July 2018

    wintersocks - I can relate to those alleged fun times at work- at least with my last few jobs. They were anything but...

    I’m sure you are upset about what happened but try and put it behind you. You have more important things to concentrate on than uncaring people like her.

    Diane

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  • Piksie
    Piksie Member Posts: 161
    edited July 2018

    Wow, wintersocks! that person should telecommute more!

    I've been trying to figure out my lack of emotion this time around. Last time I was always one stray thought away from crying. I was able to keep it in for the most part, but every time I was in my car or my house alone, I would cry, scream, yell, etc. It seemed like every time I saw a doctor, they added bad news. More invasive tumors, spots on my lungs and bones, a mass on my ovary, etc. (they all turned out to be "just signs of a well-lived life".) It got a lot easier after surgery when my lymph nodes were clear and I was able to be reconstructed.

    FFWD to today; it's back. And this time, I know it's in my lymph node(s). So why am I not freaking out? I was a mess during the time between finding the lump and receiving confirmation from biopsies. But since then, I'm cool as a cucumber. Why? This one is way more complicated. I'm meeting with my surgeon today to find out what my surgical options are, which will be different because she's taking all Level I and Level II lymph nodes, and I get radiation this time... and having a recurrence on a non-existent breast makes reconstruction trickier... and my risk of recurrence went from 3% to 30%... and Arimedix because the Tamoxifen didn't work. Even writing this brings no emotion. Perhaps I'll wake up some day and find it's all a dream? :) Or my surgeon will get my head out of the clouds today.

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