Third Breast Cancer Diagnosis, this time Metastastasized

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Anonymous
Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376

I was diagnosed 1-22-18. I have begun a blog about my diagnosis and how I'm dealing with and living with it. I would love to share my blog with other women in similar situations or those who have loved ones with cancer. Since it is not allowed to post websites/URLs here, you can check my Profile for the URL. I would love to hear from you!

Comments

  • KBeee
    KBeee Member Posts: 5,109
    edited March 2018

    Wow. You are an incredible writer.

    I am so sorry you are facing this. There aren’t words strong enough for how much I despise cancer.

    I understand also your feeling of dread when your doctors said you should be clear from here. I was just starting to feel comfortable that maybe mine would not come back (like my gut said it would) when mine came back; it was right after I got switched to every 6 month appointments. I dread that I’ll be switched to that at my next appointment. I hate when people say all should be fine because a certain amount of time has passed.

    What symptoms led you to the doctor?

    I hope your symptoms ease and that the meds get you to NED

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2018

    Thank you so much KBee for reading my blog and for your comments!

    The symptoms that led me to contact my oncologist were: Right after Christmas, I had a terrible night of "sleep - or lack thereof" as I was in severe pain through my left shoulder area. I could not get comfortable and the pain was unrelenting. When I got up the next day I was feeling around my shoulder area and found a large lump just under my collar bone. It was then that I contacted my primary doctor and my oncologist. I was also having some difficulty breathing and experienced pain when attempting to get a deep breath. My previous two breast cancer diagnoses were on the left side, so I had that sinking feeling that something was terribly wrong.

    Thank you for your well wishes about my symptoms and the effectiveness of the meds!

    --Kathy

  • farmerlucy
    farmerlucy Member Posts: 3,985
    edited March 2018

    So powerful. Thank you for or sharing your gift. I have been sitting with your words all night. I also took time to practice Niksen today.

    I’m so sorry about the new diagnosis. I hope you find peace of mind very soon.

    Thank you again

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2018

    farmerlucy,

    You are so welcome! Thank you for reading my blog and for your comments about Niksen - I hope it brings you some quiet, healing moments!

    Thank you, also, for your comments about my diagnosis and your hopes that I find peace of mind very soon. It seems you truly spent a lot of time reading my blog as your comments reflect being touched by passages that are in differing places in the blog .

    Peace of mind is cyclical and elusive. More times than not, it just happens before I am aware that the change has been made. Other times a phone call, a passage in a book, time spent with those I care about and God's intervention bring that much valued tranquilty.

    I pray for your good and long-lasting health, and a future full of beauty and life!

  • LiMa66
    LiMa66 Member Posts: 73
    edited March 2018

    PrairieWolf- thank you for sharing your story. Cancer really sucks. I've been told I'm "lucky" because I'm not getting chemo and may or may not require radiation therapy (consult pending). Not sure I understand the "lucky" comments because I had pretty nice breasts before they were removed and I'm not thrilled with these Tamoxifen side effects, but whatever. I've learned to be very selective in who I share info with. I do understand my situation could be worse.

    Anyhoo.....I pray for you and all of us battling this stupid disease, regardless of where we are in our fight. Cancer sucks. I'm just trying to find my purpose in all this nonsense.

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2018

    Many thanks, LiMa!

    I agree that cancer sucks. I don't think there is a word to adequately describe the hideousness of cancer. The limit of its destruction seems boundless, on so many levels.

    My concept of "lucky" has changed with each diagnosis. My motto has always been: It could always be worse. And though it has gotten worse, I can still hold on to that motto.

    A friend recommended a book: A Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Larkl. I ordered it Friday for my Kindle and have started reading it. You might find encouragement in this book. Just a thought...

  • Micmel
    Micmel Member Posts: 9,450
    edited March 2018

    Fantastic and beautifully written . Thank you for sharing. Sending hugs from a fellow sister! ~M~

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2018

    Thank you very much, Micmel! I appreciate that you have read the blog and for your comments! Sending those hugs right back at ya! :-)

  • chronicpain
    chronicpain Member Posts: 385
    edited March 2018

    I read your blog, both heart-breaking and inspiring, and it brought tears to my eyes. Thank you.

    I hope, hope, hope, so hard, that you be granted a remission

  • Micmel
    Micmel Member Posts: 9,450
    edited March 2018

    It is a very well written legacy you're preparing. I am sure it's helpful. I think you have been given a special gift in your ability to write like that. It really is very well done. I wish you nothing but the best. Much love ~M~

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2018

    Dear chronicpain,

    Thank you so very much. You are welcome! I thank you for your well wishes for a REMISSION! May I extend to you all the best, medically, emotionally, and mentally! Hugs!!

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2018

    Again, thank you for all your thoughtful words. As for it being a legacy - it is a journal: As my signature says, " Life goes on, and I intend to do the same."

  • Micmel
    Micmel Member Posts: 9,450
    edited March 2018

    the meaning of legacy has many meanings to me. I reada lot of things. I view anyone that has touched my life as allowing me to learn a little about you , to actually feel your pain and understand. Everyday living the same way you are. I also intend to keep going but one day if I am not here. If I could help just one person.it would be some sort of legacy. To help others and you didn't even realize how important reading that may become to someone. You're a special writer. Albeit a journal or legacy. It sure did ring Home with me.... so thank you for sharing!

  • Kell001
    Kell001 Member Posts: 26
    edited May 2018

    I too have had 3 dx and this year was the 3rd and it is Stage 4. I always felt like it would come back. My first dx was a Stage 1, May 2002. I had a Stage 1 in Oct. 2008 and now 2018 Stage 4.

    This is so draining.

    Today I am feeling sad. 😞


  • Mamasha
    Mamasha Member Posts: 104
    edited June 2018

    kell001

    I don't know if you will come back to this thread but I really wanted you to know how loved you are. Hugs from all of us

  • Kell001
    Kell001 Member Posts: 26
    edited June 2018

    Mamasha,

    Thank you! I need all the hugs I can get. 😀

  • KBeee
    KBeee Member Posts: 5,109
    edited June 2018

    Kell001, ((((HUGS))))

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited June 2018

    Kell001 - I am so very sorry to hear you, too, have received a third diagnosis and the it is stage 4. Reading your post, I noticed the years we received each diagnosis are close, as is the distance between the diagnoses.

    I am sorry you are feeling drained and sad! My thoughts and prayers go out to you, as I, too, have and will again feel those emotions. I talk about them in my blog - my cathartic way of getting rid of some of the bad and finding a way to move forward and live.

    Sending you {{{ spirit hugs }}} and love, as one sister to another.

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited June 2018

    Mamasha

    I just read your post. Thank you so very much for your comment! You have lifted my spirits and gave me a gift today. I shall hold your gift close to my spirit and my heart, as it will allow me to move forward through my day with a lighter outlook and one bolstered with the knowledge there are those souls out there who, by taking a moment to leave a post, make a person's day sunnier. My gratitude - HUGS

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