My mother breast cancer diagnosis

Brian, has your mother had a CT or PET scan? My drs did one before my chemo and again afterwards.

A stage 3B diagnosis has a good chance of survival. I was diagnosed a Stage 3A and I've survived 10 years. I also had chemo before my surgery (called neoadjuvant chemo), and it did a very good job of reducing the size of the tumor. Some woman even have a complete response to the chemo and the tumor all but disappears. However, the drs will still operate to remove the area, or if your mother opts, the complete breast.

I had four doses of my chemo, three weeks apart, then surgery (I opted for a double mastectomy and had reconstruction later), then two more doses of chemo. The hardest part for me was the hair loss. There were other side effects from the chemo like some tastes changed or disappeared (I couldn't taste salt for a while and my family said I over-salted a lot of their meals), and I had some constipation and fatigue. But overall, I was surprised at how I got through it so well.

As for the comment from your mother's oncologist, I've found that most drs fall into one of two groups. Either they are very optimistic, or they are very pessimistic. I'd love to find one that was realistic. There are many Stage 3B woman that have come through these boards as long time survivors. But you know what? They don't hang around because they are back living their lives fully with their families. Check out the Stage III area and you'll see a thread where woman who have hit 5 years, 10 years, and 15 years have posted.

Hi Brian,

The first thing my breast surgeon from Dana Farber said to me was she didn't care about stage for survival. Stage was important for treatment purposes. The bottom line for survival is how you (as an individual) respond to treatment.

Since your mom is ER+, she will have additional treatment options after chemo is done. She will be put on a hormone suppressor.

I too had chemo before surgery to shrink down the tumors (4 in all) and I also had extensive lymph node involvement. It made surgery easier for my surgeon to get clear margins. I did not have a complete response to chemo but my oncologist was not concerned since the type of cancer I had was not expected to respond completely to the chemo. Later I would find out my cancer had changed to Her2 positive during treatment. That means I needed additional treatments. Prognosis did not change.

Lastly, as the two ladies above mentioned, there are plenty of people on here who were diagnosed with stage III and IV that have survived many years. There are so many more treatments out there now. Breast cancer is not the death sentence it was years ago.

I wish your mother well.

Hi Brian, I'm sorry to hear about your mother's cancer progression. This means she will be treated for many years with various types of chemo (often in pill form) along with other drugs to suppress the progression of cancer. I know many people who are 10 to 20 year survivors with advanced breast cancer. Advanced breast cancer is considered a chronic disease rather than a curable disease. I'm glad they caught it. Please don't hesitate to keep asking questions. Also, you can explore other threads here at Breast Cancer Org that pertain to "Stage IV" breast cancer. These are women with advanced breast cancer like your mother. It will be helpful for you and your mom to read about their experiences, tips, concerns, and triumphs, etc.

How are you doing, Brian? This is tough for you too. We are here if you need us. You sound like a wonderful son. Just reach out. Hugs, Meg

Remember that the chemo is accumulated. She's going to get tired. Also, there are usually a few different types of medications involved in a long treatment. Just keep doing everything in the plan.