I JUST FOUND OUT I'M TRIPLE NEGATIVE - I'M REALLY DOWN

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Hope2018
Hope2018 Member Posts: 45

I had recently been diagnosed (from core biopsy that I was ER+).  But surgical removal of tumor now is triple negative.  The lab that did the core biopsy just now confirmed that they made a mistake and I'm triple negative.  

How do I get over this overwhelming feeling.  I know I need strength for what I am going to be confronted with.  Will it be that bad with chemo.  I am almost 70 and feeling like I should just let the cancer take it's course.  I know I shouldn't feel this way but I can't help it.  

Feeling hopeless today.  Got to get out of this feeling......Help....

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Comments

  • VL22
    VL22 Member Posts: 851
    edited March 2018

    Hope - I’m so sorry you’re here and that you feel so scared and helpless. But please believe me when I say I’ve been there and so have all the other ladies here. Why do we get stuck with TN - why can’t we just have the “standard” common cancer?

    You’ll get through this - it’s tough and you’ll cry and scream, but you’ll begin to have good days again too. Read throug the chemo threads and you’ll see that chemo is doable. You have the fight in you.

    Please share your diagnosis information- it does help to discuss your situation.

    This is a great place for support and courage and a shoulder to cry on.

    Hugs.

  • EastcoastTS
    EastcoastTS Member Posts: 864
    edited March 2018

    Hope:

    My mom was 73 at diagnosis -- ILC/TN. She did the treatment and is doing fine 10 years later. There are lots of stories like hers out there.

    {hugs}


  • Connie1230
    Connie1230 Member Posts: 192
    edited March 2018

    I was 67 when diagnosed. This is doable. I realize that chemo and radiation affects everyone differently. But truly chemo was not anywhere near as bad as what I expected and feared. All you hear are the horror stories.

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    VL22- Thank you for the encouragement and a shoulder to cry on.  I'm glad I found this site and it provides much support and information.

    I read thru some of the chemo threads (new to chemo) and it does provide some valuable information.  Do you have some input or tips regarding your chemo treatment?

    Hugs from Joanie from New Jersey....TN cancer - what a bitch.....

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    EastcoastTS - What a wonderful story. I'm glad your Mom did well.  What do you think would be her best advice during these times (during chemo)?

    I hope you are doing well on your treatment.

    Joanie from Jersey 

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    Connie - Thank you for your response and encouragement.  It is so helpful to hear from all of you during these times.  Some day we will all look back and say "Damn we beat this nasty cancer"......No horror stories please......

    Thank you again for your support.

    Joanie from Jersey  

  • anotherNYCGirl
    anotherNYCGirl Member Posts: 1,033
    edited March 2018

    Hi Joanie,

    Welcome to our midst. You can do this! ( dont they say "70 is the new 50"? ;)

    Lots of support and info on these boards, some specific to TN. You will find it a huge help!

    Hugs from NYC!


  • klvans
    klvans Member Posts: 258
    edited March 2018

    Hope I'm no youngster and I recently completed chemo. It was very doable. I had great emotional support and I watched my nutrition very carefully which made a huge difference. I'm triple negative but I don't feel hopeless about it. Triple negative responds well to chemotherapy. Hugs to you.

  • VL22
    VL22 Member Posts: 851
    edited March 2018

    Hope - chemo is so different for everyone. The basics are staying hydrated, eating and report SEs immediately, because usually there is help for them. For me, nausea on AC was the big SE - the anti nausea pills didn’t help, so I got a nausea patch. Some people do a great job eating healthy - I went from a lifetime of healthy eating to drinking cherry coke all day! On Taxol I had muscle and joint aches. Fatigue was also a factor.

    It’s tough and it takes time to recover, but now that I’m on the other side I feel that I have done all that I can do and I’m happy and alive

  • Hariry
    Hariry Member Posts: 138
    edited March 2018

    Dear you remind me of the emotions I've had few months back when informed of the dx of TNBC. Totally understand. Totally shocked. But trust me, you can get through this. Chemo kills it, so many of us here proves it. Those undergoing neoadjuvant chemo see the tumor shrink. And it's bearable.

    My prayer is with you.

    Hariry

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    Hi anotherNYCG,

    You are a remarkable lady.  I noticed you have been through a lot.  This nasty cancer stuff really takes a number of  twists and turns.  You are a brave lady.  I hope to be as strong as so many on this site.  What other choices do we have.  Thank you for the support.  Spring will be here soon (I think) and we can enjoy the beautiful flowers and be grateful for another day.

    Hugs

    Joanie from Jersey

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    Hi klvans,

    Thank you for your encouragement.  I am 69 1/2 hoping to make 80 something with some quality of life left.  Emotional support is a major key and I have certainly found it through people like you and in this wonderful forum.   I'm glad you found chemo not to be so bad.  Do you have any suggestions regarding nutrition?  Any help in this area is appreciated.  

    Hugs

    Joanie from New Jersey 

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    Hi VL22,

    Me too.  I'm a healthy eater for the most part.  I haven't eaten red meat for 30 years.  I do like Italian food.  So what's up with us eating healthy and getting into this mess.  I noticed that you went from hormone positive to negative.  It goes to show how little we know about this nasty little bug we have.  I guess I will see on the 26th of this month with my MO what the stew is that they are brewing up for me.  Cherry coke sounds great to me.  I'm glad your alive and on the other side.  

    Hugs

    Joanie from Jersey

  • rdeesides
    rdeesides Member Posts: 459
    edited March 2018

    Hope,

    Chemo is totally bearable. My 85 year old aunt just went through chemo (for a different type of cancer) and she said it was totally fine! In many cases, chemo completely kills the tumor. For those cases that it doesn't, immunotherapy is an exciting new field where there are possibilities. It's normal to feel down, but try to focus on the positive things you can do to help yourself beat this. If you need to ask your doctor for some anti anxiety medication, do it. It really helps. Let us know if you have any questions/need help. We are here for you.

    Rebekah

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    Hi Hariry,

    I give you a lot of credit having 4 children and going thru the chemo.  You are blessed to have your children and I'm sure they keep your mind busy which is a good thing with what we have to digest.  I'm wishing you much success in your treatment and long life ahead.  

    I'm curious - what is  IV dexa?.  You mentioned it in one of your threads.  Just think Spring is almost here...

    Hugs

    Joanie from Jersey  

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    Hi Rebekah,

    Your 85 yr old aunt sounds remarkable.  And so do you.  Thank you for the encouragement.   

    I am not a medication taker.  I won't even take an aspirin if I have a bad headache.  I haven't been sleeping to well and the MO recommended taking melatonin.  I haven't even taken that.   But I guess I'm going to resign to the fact that my body is just going to put up with these nasty chemicals for a bit.  

    I hope your journey reveals new and beautiful discoveries in family and friends.  I have and I am so grateful for that.   

    Hugs

    Joanie from Jersey (not as nice as San Diego)....

  • anotherNYCGirl
    anotherNYCGirl Member Posts: 1,033
    edited March 2018

    Hi Joanie,

    Thank you for your kind words, - but I am no different than you, or the others here. You will see, - we do what we have to, and get through it because, as you say, we have no choice. Chemo is do-able, and we get through the necessary procedures and treatments.

    You have lots of company along on this journey! When you have a treatment plan, we will know better what to suggest ;)

    My Mom was diagnosed with bc when she was 68. In those days they didnt know hormone receptor status. - but she had mast, no chemo or follow up meds, and lived to a month short of 99!

    Keep your chin up!!

    Hugs from NYC

  • ventureval
    ventureval Member Posts: 23
    edited March 2018

    Hi Hope,

    I turned 60 in Sept of 2017 then found out I was TN in late Nov 2017. It is so do able. Don't get me wrong it is hard. We are all fighting our upward battles. But let me give you a piece of advice that has gotten me through my troubles. My Aunt in 1998 was dying of cancer of the adrenaline glands. I chose to go see her before she passed away. (lived states away) She was in such great sprits and spunky what a woman. I asked her how she could be so happy and spunky. She told me that you live your life to live everyday, not that you live your life dying everyday. I have been living my life just as she told me. It has gotten me through my rough times. I pray you do well Hope. You can fight the fight.

  • DoubleBloom
    DoubleBloom Member Posts: 67
    edited March 2018

    Hope,

    Have hope! TNBC is very responsive to chemo. I found this paragraph from an article posted right here on BC.O

    Some research has shown that hormone-receptor-negative breast cancers — which triple-negative breast cancers are — actually respond better to chemotherapy than breast cancers that are hormone-receptor-positive. If you follow the treatment plan that makes the most sense for your specific situation, while doing your best to make healthy lifestyle choices such as eating a healthy low-fat diet, exercising regularly, and limiting alcohol, you're doing everything you can to treat the cancer.

    When you're first diagnosed, it's understandable to feel overwhelmed about what is to come. Of course this site is a valuable resource. Don't hesitate to be an active participant in your care... asking doctors, nurses, and other providers all the questions you need answers to.

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    Hi DoubleBloom,

    Thank you for your input.  This is a wonderful forum with a lot of good information.  It looks like quite a process in the overall management of this disease.  But I will try and stay hopeful for me and all the beautiful ladies on this site.  

    How much exercise were you able to do when you were on chemo? I go to the gym everyday for only 45 minutes.  Walking on the treadmill and leg presses.  I will be finding out my chemo plan March 26th.  I'm hoping I can go to the gym but I'm not sure how isolated you should be to avoid any infections.  

    Hoping to hear from you.

    Hugs....

    Joanie from Jersey  

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    Hi Ventureval,

    Your aunt definitely had the right spirit.  Thank you for the encouragement and I know the love and support thru friends and family will definitely help.  I am wishing you many more years of a wonderful life.

    Hugs....

    Joanie from Jersey 

  • DoubleBloom
    DoubleBloom Member Posts: 67
    edited March 2018

    Hope,

    Everyone has a different start point and experience with chemo. I'd suggest that you don't let anyone else's experience scare you or let you get overly excited. I've heard of some women who have walked three miles a day all the way through chemo while others didn't exercise at all. Many women maintain full time jobs (even if they occasionally fall asleep at their desk!) I think you have a really great head start to already be walking and doing leg presses at age 70! Keep it up as best as you can!

    While at the gym, grocery store, or any public place, avoid touching your face after you've touched other surfaces. Keep some hand sanitizer to use as soon as you get in your car and then wash your hands the minute you get home. If necessary you can wear a mask. Tell anyone who is sick to stay away and make all of your visitors wash their hands when they come over. Luckily we're getting out of flu and cold season but it doesn't hurt to be cautious.

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    Doublebloom - You are right.  Everyone's experience is different on chemo.  Just like all of our cancers are different.......I will do my best to keep exercising and staying positive.  Thank you so much for your encouragement and wise input.  

    Now all I have to do is figure out how to really sleep thru the night.

    Hugs.

    Joanie from Jersey

  • tishas
    tishas Member Posts: 1
    edited March 2018

    Ladies, Thanks for sharing. I had my first round of chemo last week and I have had several side effects. Reading thru some of these posts have helped give me some good insight.

  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited March 2018

    Welcome, Tishas! We hope you find our community to be a place of support as you continue with your treatment. We know it isn't easy, but you're definitely not alone!

    The Mods

  • Hariry
    Hariry Member Posts: 138
    edited March 2018

    Hope, iv dexa stands for intravenous dexamethasone. Pre meds before chemo infusion I received during every taxol. Some MO prefers to give oral dexa one day before and during treatment. Mine opted iv. I agree coz taking them before sleep will make the night somewhat restless.

    Tishas, I'm sorry you found yourself here. It must be a couple of difficult weeks. Hope that you recover well from the last chemo. Let us know what are the SE? We share tips on overcoming them,here 😉

  • DoubleBloom
    DoubleBloom Member Posts: 67
    edited March 2018

    Hope,

    Thinking of you and hoping you had a restful night's sleep!


  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    Thank you Doubleblooming.  Last nights sleep wasn't too bad.  I think I was so exhausted I just passed out.  Maybe I can make 2 nights in a row with decent sleep.  

    It's weird, I go along during the day and all of a sudden I stop in my tracks and say "I have Cancer".  It hits me just like a brick.  Do you experience periods like that?

    Hugs

    Joanie from Jersey  

  • EastcoastTS
    EastcoastTS Member Posts: 864
    edited March 2018

    Yes, it's been a little over a year since diagnosis -- but sometimes it's still hard to fathom. So many changes come with BC. Not all physical.

  • Hope2018
    Hope2018 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2018

    HelloHariry,

    Thank you for the update on dexa. We are walking pharmacies......

    Hugs

    Joanie from Jersey

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