Pretty sure I have skin mets

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StaceySue2U
StaceySue2U Member Posts: 281
edited January 2018 in Just Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastasis

I have two little bumps, one on each breast in the skin over my implants.. One looks like a small dark purple to blue black mole and it feels kinda like it has a string underneath it. I’ve been wishing and hoping it’s a buried stitch but I don’t think so. The one on the other breast is flesh colored and felt kind of like a hard blackhead under the skin but it’s been there for weeks now. I’ve picked at them and they don’t come off.

Any idea how much time most people have left once they get skin Mets? I’ve got some things on my bucket list that I want to do with my family.

On the bright side the nursing center I work for just got bought out and I got every possible insurance I could possibly get when we switched over. So will have the $ available to play

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited January 2018

    Stacey,

    First, don't jump to any conclusions. You should talk to a doctor first about any concerns you may have. Please reach out to your oncologist or GP soon to express your concerns and let us know how it goes.

    Keep us posted. We're thinking of you!

    --The Mods

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  • KBeee
    KBeee Member Posts: 5,109
    edited January 2018

    Goodness, don’t jump to conclusions. Make an appointment with your MO and BS for a check up. Mets is one out of a ton of possibilities, but it is unlikely to present bilaterally, and look different on each side. It could be anything from a stitch surfacing, to scar tissue to infection. Because recurrence is a risk for everyone, that’sbon The latest nag list of possibilities. Call Monday, get an appointment, and be seen. Keep us posted. In the meantime, train your mind to believe it is benign until proven otherwise

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  • StaceySue2U
    StaceySue2U Member Posts: 281
    edited January 2018

    Thank you for your kind words. I have an oncology appointment at 10:15 this morning. I really don't think I'm being pessimistic although perhaps I am jumping the gun. What else could cause a new dark-colored lesion? Unless there are black stitches coming to the surface....I've had stitches come to the surface but they've never been black. It's be

    I think this might sound really crazy - but if it's stage IV I think I'm OK with that. In a way, I think I'd actually be relieved. I am just about as type-A a personality as a person can be. I went back to work (as a nurse) while I still had my drains in after my bilateral mastectomy and I think by doing that I accidentally led everyone to believe it's easy for me. Everybody, including my husband, has come to expect that kind of dedication from me, and I feel like they take it for granted. I'm the primary breadwinner. I married an older man and he's mostly retired. He works a very part time job for pop and cigarette money because I told him he has to pay his half of the bills and I'm NOT going to buy his pop and cigarettes. We could live frugally off of his retirement but he's not the type of guy to take care of a woman financially. I just got "promoted" to Director of Nursing. The former DON basically had a nervous breakdown and I was the only person "dedicated" (AKA "insane") enough to be able to take his spot. I honestly don't mind the regular stresses of the position - phone calls from nurses on all shifts, at all hours of the day and night, long hours at work etc. - but it's the 12-hour shifts on the floor that I'm expected to cover when nurses call in sick that are ridiculous. People act like I'm a witch for getting crabby about it! How many times do I have to tell people "I broke my pelvis in five places and then immediately after that got diagnosed with breast cancer. I'm on a medication for my cancer that makes me have terrible hot flashes and drip sweat all over when I exert myself. It's embarrassing. My pelvic bones hurt terribly when I'm on my feet so long. I'm not just being crabby for no reason! Plus I'm afraid I'll make a medication error, because I don't feel like I'm as mentally sharp as I used to be."

    If I find out this is mets I'm going to be able to laugh and say "Guess what. The answer is NO! I'm not covering that 12-hour night shift and if you don't like that, well, I guess I just won't cover the rest of the DON duties either. Ta...freakin....TA!!!!!!" Then I'll cash in on the insurance I was recently able to purchase, get disablity as well (hopefully - is that how it works??) pack the horses up in the back of the horse camper, and hit the trails and keep riding until I can't ride anymore. Hubby is a great trail partner. Ride every day all summer long, stay at the horse campgrounds....the grandbabies can come visit us there....if I make it to winter we'll take the horses down to the gulf coast of Alabama where camping is cheap and ride all winter..... I mean, I wouldn't HAVE to have chemo or anything that would make me unable to function right up until the very end right? I can make the most of it.


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  • Peregrinelady
    Peregrinelady Member Posts: 1,019
    edited January 2018
    Sorry if this offends you, but after seeing my sister pass from MBC and the trials of people on this board, hoping for a stage 4 diagnosis is not the answer to your problems. Try to find other ways to address your concerns about your job and home life, because what you’re describing sounds like you want to escape. Maybe explain the need to cut back to your supervisors and have a frank discussion with your husband. Now is the time to take care of yourself. You are young and have many years ahead of you.
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  • StaceySue2U
    StaceySue2U Member Posts: 281
    edited January 2018

    No you didn't offend me and I'm sorry for offending you and sorry you had to watch your sister pass away. My family has really been slammed with cancer and several of us have died young. Those of us who survive miss them every day.

    I'm just feeling overwhelmed and a little crazy right now. My mind is going everywhere and I’m looking for people who talk to who understand some things about life that maybe most people don’t understand until they get cancer. Like - it’s OK to be OK with it but to be realistic about it and plan ahead.

    Seriously. If this is what I think it is, I’m not going to let those around me tell me how I have to handle it. I will keep working until the weather gets warm and then I’m off to have some freakin fun for once.

    If it’s nothing....well, I will feel like an idiot for jumping the gun but hey. I will get to watch my beautiful grandchildren grow up. If I can find the time....


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  • KBeee
    KBeee Member Posts: 5,109
    edited January 2018

    A black spot on the skin could be a necrotic spot.

    I am glad you are getting it checked. Hoping they have answers and/or can do a punch biopsy to figure it out. In worst case scenario, skin mets to the breast with prior cancer is typically stage 3 local recurrence and considered curable.

    Hoping this is benign. Do NOT feel like an idiot if it is. That’s where the brain wants to take us. I do think if you are unhappy at work and home, you need to communicate it and try to make changes. Life is too short to be so overwhelmed!

    Let us know how the appointment goes

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  • StaceySue2U
    StaceySue2U Member Posts: 281
    edited January 2018

    OMG I started crying and I can’t stop. He says it absolutely positively does not even resemble any skin met he’s ever seen and it’s just something like a stitch that somehow got pulled on and bled under the skin or something. OMG now I guess I realize how scared I really was. I’m sorry for freaking out. This is my first freakout since my mastectomy though so that’s not too bad right

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  • Mimi68
    Mimi68 Member Posts: 112
    edited January 2018

    I'm very sympathetic to your anxiety and how it has played with your mind. Cancer causes fear, we've been through it. Moving beyond the diagnosis and going back to living is very hard for some but must be our first priority for ourselves and for our loved ones. Please consider talking with a cancer therapist who specializes in this very thing. Life can and will improve immensely and you can hopefully live beyond the fear of cancer. Wishing you well.

    Mimi

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  • LeesaD
    LeesaD Member Posts: 383
    edited January 2018
    StaceySue- that's awesome news! So happy to hear. I so get the anxiety and thinking everything is a met. I have a bone lump on my toe which I found yesterday and of course mind goes right to bone mets. I hope it gets better with time but this anxiety has a mind of its own. You're not alone. So glad to hear your news.
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  • StaceySue2U
    StaceySue2U Member Posts: 281
    edited January 2018

    oh but I just now got a call saying my liver enzymes are elevated and I need CTs

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  • Peregrinelady
    Peregrinelady Member Posts: 1,019
    edited January 2018
    Glad to hear it is not skin mets. Just so you know, it is perfectly natural to worry about everything after this diagnosis. I remember one lady who said that her dermatologist was checking a “mole” only to find out it was a speck of chocolate. I don’t know if or when that fear ever goes away. The trick is to not let it take up too much of your time. Acknowledge it, wait 2 or 3 weeks, then if it is still there, check with your dr. As far as liver enzymes, I believe there are many factors that affect them. Hopefully someone who knows more about that will chime in. Good luck and keep us posted.
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  • KBeee
    KBeee Member Posts: 5,109
    edited January 2018

    Tons of meds can affect liver enzymes (as you know being a nurse), but it is good your MO is on the ball doing a scan. Hoping they find a benign cause. Sorry you have this extra worry. Hoping they do the scan soon

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