Bad bad day

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Mamatwoboys
Mamatwoboys Member Posts: 22
edited November 2017 in IDC (Invasive Ductal Carcinoma)

new to all this.

Stage 3 Triple Negative Invasive Ductal Carcinoma.... all I hear is “you’re gonna die!”

Maybe not today, maybe not in 5 years, but that this is going to come back and kill me.

My sons are 4 and 10. I’m 41. I posted in the triple negative group and everyone is so kind, but it’s not just triple negative to fear, it’s this too.

Can’t start treatments because of insurance. When did insurance companies go to medical school!?!?!?

Having such a bad day. Can’t stop thinking the worst. Can’t stop crying. Can’t get out of bed. Hurting and feeling overly exhausted isn’t helping I know, but my mind is what takes me down.


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  • ml143333
    ml143333 Member Posts: 658
    edited November 2017

    I am so sorry you have joined our group here, but you have joined a knowledgeable and support group!

    It is okay to have a bad day, just don't let them get out of hand. Once you have a treatment plan in place and started, you will feel a bit more in control of your life.


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  • mustlovepoodles
    mustlovepoodles Member Posts: 2,825
    edited November 2017

    You can't start treatment because of insurance? What does that mean?

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  • Meow13
    Meow13 Member Posts: 4,859
    edited November 2017

    If it helps any your recurrence risk is low after 5 years. It is the estrogen driven cancers that are more likely to come back later down the road. Hopefully your chemo should take a big bite out of the cancer, chemo often works well on grade 3. Good luck, we are here for you.

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  • Icietla
    Icietla Member Posts: 1,265
    edited November 2017

    You can't start treatment because of insurance? What does that mean?

    ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

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  • Mamatwoboys
    Mamatwoboys Member Posts: 22
    edited November 2017

    that’s what they told me. We have tried 3 different places to get me started and no one will start any treatment because I am waiting on my insurance.... why... do you know something to help me push someone??

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  • Icietla
    Icietla Member Posts: 1,265
    edited November 2017

    Do you mean that your insurance is causing delay? Or that the delay is from not having insurance?

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  • Mamatwoboys
    Mamatwoboys Member Posts: 22
    edited November 2017

    both kind of. I had a plan, but it didn’t cover passed the mammogram and biopsy. As soon as you find out you have B, then you have to get breast cancer added and then they will cover.

    It is just taking forever to get everything done and in the meantime, I wait.

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  • Icietla
    Icietla Member Posts: 1,265
    edited November 2017

    Are you talking about a cancer benefits plan? or a health insurance plan? Are you sure it would cover a pre-existing condition?

    Be sure to sign up soon for ACA-qualified health insurance coverage for next year.

    https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/113/topics/859068?page=1#top


    Only Minimum Essential Coverage Protects People with Preexisting Conditions

    You can get covered in any major medical plan during open enrollment regardless of your health status. However, outside open enrollment, some health insurance types can still discriminate based on health status.

    To get the preexisting conditions protections, make sure you understand if you are getting a Major Medical Plan that counts as Minimum Essential Coverage. Short Term Health Insurance can still deny you or charge more for preexisting conditions.

    http://obamacarefacts.com/pre-existing-conditions/



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  • GreenEyes81
    GreenEyes81 Member Posts: 389
    edited November 2017

    Are you in the US? If so, you should be able to get things moving. There are a TON of resourses. Don't let things slow you down. You just may have to start doing some of the leg work yourself. Start looking at state options, hospital options, if you have a navigator...start talking to them. There are so many resourses in the US it is nuts. What state are you in?

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  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 19,603
    edited November 2017

    Mamaoftwo and Icelita

    Mama you're scared and don't understand the system

    Icelita you seem to be very knowledgeable about the system.

    Please, Mama consider phone contact with Iceilita being the mentor. Iceillta consider doing a phone thing.

    This is a nice medium, but in a crisis the phone is better. I've done it hundreds of times. It works.

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  • Mamatwoboys
    Mamatwoboys Member Posts: 22
    edited November 2017

    sorry... I have been so scared and upset the last few days.

    Then I found out, it wasn’t that I needed to push the insurance companies, or call state officials, or fight my doctors... it was Gods timing that mattered.

    My father in law has been living with us for a couple years. He tells me “I think I still have an infection from my surgery in my stomach” a surgery he had over a year ago. Then he started going downhill. He went to the hospital 3 days ago. He has pneumonia... a skin infection... and hole in his stomach from an infection there as well.

    If everything had been as we wanted, as we were pushing, the 4 places we tried to get into just to get a treatment started... I may have ended up with pneumonia, or worse. The day after he went in, I went to a women’s Christian conference with some women in my family. Sitting there listening to how God worked in these women’s lives, a speaker says “at that point God told me, I have this!!” At that moment, my phone went off. And insurance had fallen into place. They will cover everything!!! I start everything Monday morning!!

    I am terrified... the unknown, the pain, the hair loss, etc... I’m scared ... but something is going to start. And it’s time to start fighting this.


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  • Icietla
    Icietla Member Posts: 1,265
    edited November 2017

    So glad your insurance coverage is in effect so you can get started with your treatment! Things should start moving along readily now.

    Well before he is discharged to return home, the Social Worker/s and Attending Physician/s at your father-in-law's hospital should be informed that a household member is expected to be immunocompromised for an extended time. Also the Social Worker/s and Your own Doctor/s where you are to be treated should be informed of your father-in-law's case. These circumstances may have some bearing on whether he and/or you should have Home Health Care visits ordered for while he is recovering; advisories as to home care of either of you; and maybe even isolated care for him.

    About 2 a.m. tonight or the next night, have your husband get you several boxes of protective clinical masks and some occlusive (exam type) gloves, so you all will have them already when you need them. You will need them in some settings/situations. Best to be prepared.

    Does your older son attend school? If he does, would he be agreeable to home school instead for the rest of this school year?

    sas-schatzi -- Thank you. You flatter me too much. I do not think I am particularly knowledgeable about the Health Insurance system. I can give some practical advice -- but only the practical type. Communication by phone is always better for me -- typing is usually slow, difficult, and painful.

    Mamatwoboys -- You have a Private Message.

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