Tired of Wearing Pocket Bras & Prosthesis

SeeSwee6
SeeSwee6 Member Posts: 5
edited November 2017 in Living Without Reconstruction After a Mastectomy

So I have a collection of various pocket bras & prosthesis, and am getting tired of wearing them.They annoy me. But, my flat chest & big belly looks weird. I try to wear print tops, different fabrics & styles. I'm 65, single & want to date.

Don't know what to do.


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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited September 2017

    Hi SeeSwee-

    Have you checked out this thread on going flat? It's pretty active, and a lot of members trade advice and what has worked for them, you might find something helpful there: https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/82/topics.... We certainly understand your dilemma, hopefully you can find something that works better for you!

    The Mods

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  • ravzari
    ravzari Member Posts: 277
    edited September 2017

    Stop wearing them if you don't like them and focus on working to accept and enjoy your body without the forms.

    If the belly is a showstopper for you that you just can't accept as-is, then it's time to work at reducing its size via diet and exercise to change it.

    My gut was pretty emphasized after losing a pair of DDs (still is, though I'm working on losing it) but, whatever, my body is what it is.

    If you're looking to date eventually your partner is going to figure out that you don't have breasts anyway; if they're going to reject you because of how your body looks, they're not the right person for you and it's honestly best to figure that out early on (or even right away) rather than waste your time only to find out later that they don't find you attractive.

    The right person is the person who finds you attractive because of who you are, not because of your breasts (or lack thereof).

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  • ksusan
    ksusan Member Posts: 4,505
    edited November 2017

    My skin is still too sensitive to consider wearing an undergarment and prostheses, so I don't. Nobody seems to notice.

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  • Meow13
    Meow13 Member Posts: 4,859
    edited November 2017

    you can always look into reconstruction there is no time limit. I am happy with my DIEP.

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  • gardengypsy
    gardengypsy Member Posts: 769
    edited November 2017

    I feel ya. I can't even go out to the mailbox without putting on the bra and prosthesis. It's one thing if both breasts are gone, another if you are lopsided. I am uncomfortable a lot and getting dressed is a pain in the ass.. I've spoken to women who've done Diep after several years of this.



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  • herdaughter90
    herdaughter90 Member Posts: 1
    edited November 2017

    My 90 yo mother just had her prostheses removed for comfort reasons. Looking for padded camisole/bralette options. Doesn’t want use silicone or other prosthetics. Actually looking for good padded camisole or bralette recommendation. Like what pre-teen girls wear.... Thx ladies!

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  • xxyzed
    xxyzed Member Posts: 230
    edited November 2017
    I wear the amoena valetta camisoles. They are expensive but I like the light compression and padding they give you.
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  • wallycat
    wallycat Member Posts: 3,227
    edited November 2017

    I'm with Ravzari....

    Having a traditional silhouette is everyone's desire, but life and reality smack us in the face and we try to deal with what is in front of us. I'm of the opinion that as we age, comfort should be more important than how people will judge us by how we look. That's just me. Is it hard? Sure, sometimes I feel like people are looking at my flat chest but I am comfortable. Life is too short to worry about how we look and what people think. Focus on feeling well, staying healthy and doing activities you enjoy where you can meet like-minded people. A good man (or woman) won't judge. As we age, we all bring more baggage and health crap along with us.

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  • gardengypsy
    gardengypsy Member Posts: 769
    edited November 2017

    xxyzed-

    Thanks for the camisole tip. They look great. I just have to figure out my size.

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  • xxyzed
    xxyzed Member Posts: 230
    edited November 2017
    The amoena.com website has a size guide and I have found the measurements to be true to fit but I’m sure you could call them for help.
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  • gardengypsy
    gardengypsy Member Posts: 769
    edited November 2017

    Thanks again,xxyzed. Nothing I ever buy on line fits but I will give it a try..

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  • Snickersmom
    Snickersmom Member Posts: 926
    edited November 2017

    I had a total mastectomy 6 months ago. I was fitted for prosthetic bras and have 6 of them, with one pair of the silicone inserts. But since we live in Florida, I discovered they are very hot and uncomfortable in the summer months. Plus they are heavy. So I turned to camisoles with the inserts and got some knitted knockers from the ACS. But I didn't really like those either. So then I bought camisoles but they are either polyester and spandex or nylon and spandex. I have not been able to find any that are all or mostly all cotton. A friend said she gets cotton ones at The Loft, so I am going to try there.

    I find that I am most comfortable wearing nothing at all under shirts. But the problem I have is that some of my shirts need something under them, or I can't wear them. Without a doubt, this is one of the hardest and most depressing things about the mastectomy. I am finally understanding that people aren't looking at me and that I am still me, regardless of whether I have breasts or not. I just have to get past feeling so self-conscious

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  • ravzari
    ravzari Member Posts: 277
    edited November 2017

    Snickersmom Honestly, the only time I've ever been asked something was at the gym a couple times when another woman asked me what sports bra I was wearing that gave me such good compression and support and I was just, "I'm not wearing a bra at all, because I had a mastectomy and don't have boobs!"

    They were mortified (they'd just assumed I had small breasts and was wearing a really good compression sports bra) and I just thought it was funny; doubly funny the time I was wearing a compression sports bra after a dog ear revision. :D

    For just regular day to day, nobody notices because 99% of people aren't even looking at your chest to begin with (as that's considered pretty rude) or, if they do, they just assume you have small breasts that aren't obvious under whatever clothes you're wearing.

    Even in tank tops, which hide nothing, I've never had anyone stare or ask me why I was so flat chested.

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  • gardengypsy
    gardengypsy Member Posts: 769
    edited November 2017

    Being one-sided has been tough for me and I often think it would have been easier to have the healthy one lopped off as well.

    Snickersmom: I took xxyzed's suggestion and got an Amoena camisole. It's spandex, but it's definitely the most comfortable thing I've gotten so far.

    Have you tried a swim form yet? They are very light and cool!!

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