recently diagnosed. Waiting to start kicking cancers ass

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Lovemy3kids
Lovemy3kids Member Posts: 16

I feel this waiting is the worst!

DX Oct 17

IDC and DCIS

They guess a 2.2 cm mass

I am doing all I can to not completely lose myself in a downward spiral.

All I know is DBMX scheduled in 1.5 weeks

I know I will have chemo

I am not yet staged

I am PR+,ER+ and HER2+

Is this moving fast enough?'

I am so scared. I don't want to leave my family. I want to live my story for another 60 years .


I know I have been told this is not a fatal diagnosis, BC will not kill me, I am 95% curable

So, why does it feel so awful?

Comments

  • Peacetoallcuzweneedit
    Peacetoallcuzweneedit Member Posts: 233
    edited November 2017

    Because the diagnosis itself can make you a little cray cray - that is why it feels so awful....:-)

    It is an entire process to get through the diagnosis, understanding your treatment, and experiencing the process of dealing with all the ups and downs...and yes the fear...I was diagnosed in May and will hopefully finish out 2017 with my final reconstruction surgery in a couple of weeks...had some hiccups along the way, but still standing and sitting here recovering from a full hysterectomy. The beginning was really hard, GOD the waiting and "what ifs".... I call the downward spiral "falling down the cancer hole." Some days I am out of the hole and some days I fall down it and then climb out whichever I can and continue to learn how.

    I have learned, for me, the more information I have (did second, third, and fourth opinions, the more survivors I meet/met and talked to, and the more I stayed in the moment - the better. I don't know if that helps. While I had support from the ones closest to me, being around other survivors was the best medicine. From diagnosis to DBMX was five weeks....

    I am sorry you find yourself here BUT seriously HERE is a pretty great place of support, information, and lots of "me toos" because there are so many common threads we all feel and experience. I am sending warm hugs and hope that your DMX goes well. Here's to another 60 years lovemy3kids!

  • Bosombuddy101
    Bosombuddy101 Member Posts: 182
    edited November 2017

    Peace, Words of wisdom indeed!

    Lovemythreekids, Welcome to this cray cray group ;0) The initial diagnosis is the worst part of the process.



  • Cpeachymom
    Cpeachymom Member Posts: 518
    edited November 2017

    Love- waiting sucks but 1 1/2 weeks is probably barely enough time to prepare! I don't know how old your kids are or how much help you'll have (hopefully lots!). I found preparing to be out of commission for at least 2 weeks kept me from going nutty. I stocked the pantry and the freezer with lots of easy to prepare foods. Cleaned the house, did Tons of reading and research. Check out the forums for preparing for surgery, there's lots of good advice and suggestions.

    Best of luck to you!

  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited November 2017

    Hi Love, and welcome to Breastcancer.org,

    As others have stated, things are so tough right now because you don't have all the answers yet. Once you learn more about your diagnosis and have a concrete treatment plan in place, you'll start to feel better. In the meantime, please know you've found the best place for support, information, and advice to help get you through these hard times and beyond!

    We look forward to hearing more from you. Come back often, ask lots of questions, and get the support you need. We're all here for you!

    --The Mods

  • windingshores
    windingshores Member Posts: 704
    edited November 2017

    I had a paravertebral (regional) block in my back for my mastectomies. It reduced anesthesia I think, and got rid of pain meds entirely. So I was up and pretty much back to normal right after surgery (well, I had drains of course). You might want to ask you surgeon about this.

  • beach2beach
    beach2beach Member Posts: 996
    edited November 2017

    lovemy3kids,

    Waiting is tough. I have 3 kids too. My first initial thought was that I don't want to leave them. I'm sure you feel the same. I''m not planning on leaving them and you are not either. Truly, once this gets moving you will feel like you are doing something to put this behind you.

    It's natural to fall into the hole , it's not staying down there that's important. Feel the way you feel now.

    You got this

  • Goose48
    Goose48 Member Posts: 2
    edited November 2017

    I was diagnosed with breast cancer on November 19th. It was something I thought I would never have to face. I went through surgery and I must say, it truly does depend on the person. I've been in such discomfort that I'm finding myself having to support my left breast upon standing. Even with a very comfortable sports bra, I'm experiencing pain like pins and needles with random twinges of pain here and there. I have a 3 inch long incision underneath the breast crease along with the sentinal node biopsy incision. I had an additional wire localization for an abnormality seen on mammogram & ultrasound on the right breast. This is when the lump was discovered in my left breast. I've had the best support system from family and friends and with that, I'm hopeful that I will get through this.


  • gb2115
    gb2115 Member Posts: 1,894
    edited November 2017

    Hi, welcome to BCO! You feel awful about this because it's cancer and that sucks. It's ok to feel bad about it. Give yourself freedom and time to grieve this and process what's happening. Cry whenever you need to. Take it one day (or moment) at a time. What helped me was remembering what Elizabeth Elliott famously said "do the next thing". Moment to moment.

    It's hard to believe but someday you will be on the other side of this and life will move on. Hang in there!!

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