Just diagnosed and in limbo

Hi everyone.

I was diagnosed a week ago with triple negative ductal carcinoma grade two that has spread to lymph nodes. When I received the diagnosis I was told that the best way to treat the cancer was with chemo initially then surgery. However when I went for consultation with oncologist they did not know that I have a number of other medical conditions that apparently put me at high risk of life threatening infections due to low immune system caused by the chemo. So was then told that I would be discussed at next case meeting and they would call me back. Another 24 hours of waiting and I got a call to say that they have decided that surgery first is the best way to go and have me booked in for the 8th November. Again, due to medical conditions they do not know if they will be able to do GA or if they will need LA instead. Then there will be more waiting while they analyse tumour results further and decide on next course of treatment.

Had CT scan yesterday to see if it has spread anywhere else and have bone scan on Friday.

I just feel like I am in limbo waiting for everyone else to make decisions about my treatment and I have absolutely no control over what is happening or going to happen. I was told one thing and passed to one department then told another and passed back to first department and have not heard anything from anyone since apart from being given a date for surgery and an appointment to speak to surgeon this week.

I cannot wrap my head around any of this as I have been given the diagnosis and a number I can call if I want to talk about cancer but day to day nothing has changed. It all feels totally surreal.

I don't know if the change in treatment will affect my long term prognosis, I don't even know what the prognosis is! Seems like I am just waiting for other people to make decisions about my life and I am totally out of control.

Hi Sleepy and welcome to Breastcancer.org,

We too are sorry you find yourself here, but we're really glad you found us. You're sure to find our Community an incredible source of information, advice, and support -- there are lots of members here who can help you understand your diagnosis and share their experiences of treatment and beyond.

You may want to stop in and introduce yourself on the Triple-Negative Breast Cancer forum, where others may be able to weigh in with their experiences.

We know things are very confusing right now and you feel out of control, but that is a very normal part of this process and we know that once you have a treatment plan in place, you'll start to feel back on track.

We hope to hear more from you soon. Please come back often, ask lots of questions and stay engaged -- we're all here for you!

--The Mods

Thank you for your very supportive replies. It is comforting to know I am in a place where I can speak freely. I am in the UK so am being treated by the National Health Service. I know it is a teaching hospital as I trained there many years ago! All departments are in the same building so at least I know where to go. I am fortunate as a brand new cancer treatment wing was built last year and is dedicated to everyone with cancer and it is a very welcoming and comfortable building, good job as I will probably be spending a lot of time there. I have received excellent care in that hospital for my other health conditions so I am confident but currently confused as I am sure everyone in our situations have been.