Life insurance beneficiary

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Anonymous
Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
Life insurance beneficiary

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  • PattyPeppermint
    PattyPeppermint Member Posts: 11,162
    edited September 2017

    Not sure I spelled that correctly , beneficiary?

    Anyway now that I am divorced I am trying to make some decisions but am confused. Exdh has always been the beneficiary. We have discussed what I expect to happen to the money. Some money for ex to use to support the boys but the majority would be saved until dss's are 21. I have been confident that I can trust ex to do the right thing but he has done so many things lately that I never tough would happen. I understand my minor children can not be beneficiary. And really think they need to be an adult before receiving that much money. I've read that ex cannot be beneficiary. If I list any of them it will go to probate Court to decide wat to do of course all of those expenses would be taken from that money. Also even if I decide ex is trustworthy in that instance what if he remarried and dies then that money would go to new wife who may or may not do the right thing. I have read I can put it in a trust and pay a trustee but again. That's taking money away from boys. Any idea what that would cost ? All my family is pretty much gone except a brother - no trust at all - and a sister who is a big spender and I am a penny pincher.

    Any suggestions ?


  • NancyHB
    NancyHB Member Posts: 1,512
    edited September 2017

    Patty, it's so wonderful of you to plan for your sons' futures. Every state is different and I encourage you to consider speaking with an attorney to ensure your kids' best interests are being served. Anyone can be a life insurance beneficiary, even your kids. You should be able to legally designate their portion. Be kept in a trust until XX age, then distributed. It shouldn't be expensive to set up or administer. But - if you leave it all to your ex, even with instructions and a promise, he can pretty much do whatever he wants, and yes, if he were to remarry that money could go to his new spouse.

    It's better to spend a little now to protect your kids, than to have them lose it all or get tied up in probate later. Good luck.

  • Lula73
    Lula73 Member Posts: 1,824
    edited September 2017

    We consulted our attorney when it came time to do our wills. He said kids can be beneficiary of life insurance and are able to inherit assets. You should set up in your will how those funds will be handled-set up in a trust with a set or an open ended amount available for the kids as they grow up that is managed by a trustee you appoint is the path we chose. We chose my mom and dad as trustees. We also included a clause that everything goes into the trust for our minor son until he is 25 or he finishes secondary education (college/masters/doctoral) whichever comes first. After that anything that's left he splits 50/50 with his older brother. And if older brother is no longer living for whatever reason, his 50% goes into a trust for his daughter. So basically, you can allocate the funds any way you like, put stipulations and timeframes in place and plan for possible events down the line. But you need to have all that outlined in the will so your trustee can utilize the funds accordingly. You can have the attorney oversee/audit the trustee's use of funds as well for extra protection of those funds and to ensure the trustee is not abusing their power

  • Tina2
    Tina2 Member Posts: 2,943
    edited September 2017

    Talk with your attorney about a trust . Tell him/her your concerns and situation. You can make this work without involving your ex or siblings.

    Tina

  • JFL
    JFL Member Posts: 1,947
    edited September 2017
    Patty, I agree you should get this set up through a trust. Inquire about the cost as it shouldn't be as much as you think. If you do not want your DH to have the money 100% for himself, do not list him as beneficiary. Even if he doesn't have bad intentions, life happens. What if he loses his job or has a large, unexpected medical expense or remarries someone who insists the money be used by the two of them or worse yet, for their wedding/honeymoon. It would be the exception and not the rule that the ex-spouse carries out your wishes and doesn't take at least some of the money for himself. It is too tempting with a windfall of thousands of dollars just sitting in a person's bank account. I am a corporate attorney and spend my time negotiating contracts to avoid things going wrong down the road. Never sign up to something in writing you know now is not what you want.

    Also, each state is different but if you select (or re-confirm) your ex as the beneficiary after you are divorced, it typically will hold up.
  • PattyPeppermint
    PattyPeppermint Member Posts: 11,162
    edited September 2017

    Thanks for the advice ladies.

    Jfl. Oh my. I nearly as stopped breathing when you mentioned about the money being used for ex new marriage or honeymoon .

  • lalady1
    lalady1 Member Posts: 618
    edited September 2017

    Hi Patty - not sure about AK law, but in CA life insurance (which is tax free to beneficiaries!) can be set up in a trust for your minor children. I second the wise ladies here to do that. Please don't hope your ex will do the right thing. lol Too many lawsuits are in court because of exes changing their minds and you can't control him when you are here/not here. But you can control your money for your children. Same for social security, please make sure they are your beneficiaries, not him. Suggest you appoint a relative or your attorney to be trustee to protect your kid's money. Stagger it out so they don't inherit all at once. :)

    (()) Claire


  • Freya244117
    Freya244117 Member Posts: 603
    edited September 2017

    Patty, I am in Australia, so things may be different. I have 3 sets of paperwork organised.

    My Will

    Enduring power of attorney - this is for financial decisions to be made on my behalf once I become impaired.

    Advanced health directive - instructions about my future healthcare and gives my husband (or whoever you choose) legal control over my treatment, once I have become impaired.

    http://www.pbs.org/newshour/updates/decisions-future-documents-need-2/ - American information


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