2014 Diagnosed - How are you doing?

Same. I feel like I can't shake this depression and nobody understands why. I do have my good days where I barely think of cancer but I live under this shadow of death and fear. I get up and live my life. I put on a smile because no-one wants to see otherwise. I have chemo brain, thin hair, slight lymphedema, I can't lose weight. I can't he around babies or pregnant women. I was diagnosed less than a year into my marriage and we were going to start trying for a baby. Now I'm unable to have children and it hurts more than words can say. I resent those who think I should be happy to be alive and should just put it all behind me.

I'm not the same, physically, mentally, emotionally. I'm only 38 but I feel and look so much older. I hate how I will never be the same.

But with that said, I am happy to still be here and enjoy my family and friends. I don't want life to end anytime soon. I keep marching and am thankful for what I have, I know it could be so much worse.

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PerAugusta, that video link is not working.

I'm doing so well today, three years post treatment, even though I picked up a second cancer last year.

But, I'm really sorry to hear from those of you that aren't and I wish that this disease didn't such crappy, differing outcomes that followed treatment. In a way it's worse post treatment, since the security blanket of a team of professionals has been removed and replaced by...nothing very much. My solution was to train as a volunteer counsellor and visit the local oncology ward to help cheer people up. I also telephone counsel guys wanting help with their breast cancer journey. I've spoken to many volunteers who agree that the benefits are two-ways; by talking about cancer and connecting with people in a similar situation, you lighten your load and face up to what has come before you.

Anyway, I truely understand the different situations for women, and particularly younger women, since my mum died aged 40, leaving four young sons. That was worse for me than my cancer.

Best wishes for the future to everyone here. Try to believe that there can be bright times ahead.

PerAugusta

I'm doing good , three years post treatment , even though I also picked up a second cancer last year in my other breast. I do worry a little more after this second cancer but over all I don't let it get to me that much. I lost my twin sister at 57 I was diognosed at 59 and again at 61. Loosing my twin has been the hardest thing my heart has ever gone through. I do come to this board and read a lot and sometimes I will respond. There are so many women that know so much and ca offer more than I can on some of the information but I will encourage and let them know I'm thinking ofly. Thank you for asking and starting this post. Hugs Sus

It has been a roller coaster since 2014! I really struggled after treatment with feeling depressed with the losses (job, body, memory, concentration, fertility, etc). But I am having more good days than bad now, and feeling less worried about my cancer returning. We miraculously got pregnant last fall, but were devastated at the end of January with a silent miscarriage at 10 weeks. My fertility specialist was floored that we conceived and we are now almost 13 weeks pregnant! I am so grateful that I get to take back something we thought cancer had stolen and will be forever thankful for an oncologist who believed in miracles and let us off tamoxifen to try to conceive.

I hope that this all gets easier in time for all of us. I know that I am so lucky to be where I am at and hope for sunny days ahead for each of you.

Hello Clarrn, congratulations I'm am so happy for you.

This was a blessing to read!!!! There is hope and joy waiting for all of us. Thank you for reminding me!

all good, thanks PerAugust 👌

I was diagnosed on Aug 4, 2014 and had bilateral mastectomy on Aug 26. About 5 hours after surgery, everything started to shut down. It's a long story with lots of details that I won't go into here, but it was bad. The doc told my hubby that they only had 30 minutes to turn it around or I would be gone. But here I am!! That little set back caused everything to slow down, didn't start chemo til the end of Oct 2014. I had expanders placed at the time of surgery, had them filled before chemo started, got pneumonia in Jan 2015, a bad infection in the left breast and had to have antibiotic infusions every day for weeks. Finally got he expanders out and the implants in March 2015. Had to have both of them removed, one in April and the other in June 2015...staph infections. I'm happy with my prosthetics, tho. My hubby is my rock which is a great blessing. I started Aromasin in Sept 2015. I have side effects, hot flashes and joint pain that moves around. This week it's both of my elbows. I'm still seeing my onco every 3 months. I am mostly upbeat and positive, but I'm terrified that the cancer will come back. I can't shake that fear, even after 3 years!! What's up with that?? In a lot of ways, I feel like I'm not moving forward. Does anyone else feel that way?? It's good to know that I'm not alone. Other people don't understand unless they've been in the same place. God Bless.

Thank you for starting this thread!

I am on the tail end of 2014, received my diagnosis the day after my 39th birthday. I'm doing mostly ok, as long as there are no unusual aches or pain all is good. Work full time, travel a lot, exercise, socialize and generally enjoy the moment. Not sure what the future holds, but I try not to get too caught up in negativity. My future planning has always been vague, so that continues to be the case!

Hormone therapy has been ok so far. Aromasin didn't agree with me, but tam + zol is not too bad.

Hi,

I was diagnosed in March of 2014 went through surgery, IVF, chemo, rads and tamoxifen. I worked full time through my treatment and didn't have many side effects. the first year after dx was very hard and I was living in fear with every pain that I was feeling. Second year was hard too as my dreams of using my embryos were shattered, we considered adoption but now i don't know if it will be possible. i had my annual MRI this August and an intramammary node showed up (thickened cortex) birad 4. The FNA biopsy found normal tissues which is not in agreement with the MRI. I know people had gotten false negatives from FNA so I have an MRI in November. So there years later I am waiting to find out what this single node is. I have no emotions regarding this I only want to know as I am waiting to have my first DIEP surgery. Other than this life is back to normal and the dx of three years ago seems such a distant memory.

Clarrn congratulations!! wishing you a boring and uneventful pregnancy.

Lola

I was diagnosed December 2013 and had breast removed on my birthday January 2014. Spent several years getting reconstructed and worrying, the latter of which which will probably never go away.

My hubby makes me feel special still, and my four kids are now 11, 13, 15 and 17. They were toddlers when I was dx. My eldest starts university this year

We prayed a lot, which helped us. Not for everyone., but a healthy church community is nice to falll back onat times.

Posted because back in 2014 it crossed my mind I might not see 2020 or beyond. Here we are. Trump is president. Egads