Architectural Distortion & Falling Apart

I remember well when I was called back for a biopsy. I was panicked and an emotional wreck. To be honest in hindsight it was the most exhausting time in my entire treatment plan.

Try to stay calm. First you have good odds that its not cancer. Second if it is don't panic because once you find out either way you can make a plan. I can say with some certainty that you will be able to keep your workload and find a path forward. Many women here work through treatment. It actually helps because it keeps life normal.

For now try to not get to far ahead in your thinking. Maybe ask your GP for some Ativan to help with the anxiety and stay busy. I know its easier said than done but worrying really saps your energy. An "Architectural Distortion" could be anything. Mamograms show all kinds of stuff and a majority of it is benign.

Nightcrawler, of course you are a mess. I am so sorry you are in this position. As others have and will tell you, the waiting is the hardest part. Try to keep busy until after the biopsy results: if your worst fears are confirmed, you can deal with getting a plan in place then. Until you have information, there really isn't much point in googling options (and much of what google tells you is outdated anyway).

That all said, I have to add: I was horrified to read that your letter was on pink paper. For that matter, I was horrified that the news came via a letter. I've had both 'good' and 'bad' mammograms and biopsies and in each case I was either told results on the spot, or, if there had to be a wait for results, I was told that good news came via a letter, bad news came via a phone call. Indeed, I just had a biopsy for skin cancer (which was B9 thank goodness) and they told me that if I got a letter in the mail I didn't really need to even open it: 'if it comes in the mail, it is good news.' Honestly, if it were me, at some point when I was ready I'd let whatever care giver wrote that 'Pink Letter of Doom' know exactly how you felt receiving it. I think they should be ashamed of themselves for using pink in that fashion, and for that matter, I think it makes no sense for such news to come in the mail (what if it got lost in the mail? What if a family member mistakenly tossed it before you got it? Shouldn't there be a phone call so they know you have the info you need to move to the next step?). I am so sorry that happened to you.

Sending hugs;

Octogirl

Nightcrawler

I know how hard this is. It totally sucks at the moment and pretty much nobody can talk you out of it! I, too, had test results of architectural distortion. Plus assymtry & a measurable possible abnormal mass (very recently.) It seemed like years to get my results (but not really/about 5 days.) I am a rational person with a pretty darn good positive outlook on life. But this will shake your shoes for awhile no matter how tough you are, it's ok to freak out just a bit. There is a lot of great info on this site/forums. Plus a whole lot of great folks who know exactly what you're going through & are amazing support! After my core needle biopsy, the tech gave me an ice pack. He exclaimed " look. It's even wrapped in pink!" Wtf?BTW, I was diagnosed with radial scar & LCIS, with a lumpectomy wire biopsy in June to rule out anything else. Best case scenario for now (even though not totally out of the woods.) But I feel blessed, even though it felt like doomsday recently. You can get through this. But it does get waaaay better when you get answers either way. Sending you many positive thoughts/prayer. Stay strong!

Nightcrawler:

I can only imagine that pink paper hit you like a hammer to the side of the head. I didn't get a pink paper. I got a phone call telling me to show up for a diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound. Whaaaatttt? My mamm showed an area of architectural distortion. That was later called a radial scar or complex sclerosing lesion. That is fancy talk for a radial scar, but bigger. Most radial scars are tiny and most are NOT cancer. Mine was large (2.5 cms) and mine is cancer.

I am not going to tell you not to worry because this is a HUGE worry for most women. This is the news that there are bears in the woods, wait, breaking news, the bear might be in the same room you're in right now. Not sure, but he might be really close. In this setting worrying is pretty much guaranteed and you'd have to be either super human or medicated as hell not to worry.

At this stage the best thing to do is force yourself to do something. Scrub the toilet. Fold laundry. Pull weeds. Just keep your hands busy. You may still be crushed by anxiety and black thoughts, but at least the toilet will be clean and your laundry will be done. I wanted to lay in a heap and cry and close my eyes and wish it all away. I DID wish it all away. Didn't work. I tried anyway.

You are not a baby. Not hysterical, not crazy, not a wuss. You do not have to be positive, you do not have to be strong. You can quit answering the phone for a while. You can say to your husband, "Yes I AM spending the day in bed and no I am NOT going to brush my hair and yes I AM taking this bottle of Jack Daniels with me and NO I am not sharing it and no I will NOT be making dinner tonight!" You are entitled to a few moments of being unreasonable.

Once you know more this site is an excellent resource to bring questions to. As others have said, be wary of Dr. Google. You probably should stay off the internet altogether, but you won't, so just be aware that you have to read A LOT to get a clear and unbiased picture of the state of cancer treatment today. It is a much bigger science than I ever imagined.

I am sorry that you got that pink paper. I hope for you that it's a pink paper excusing you from this class!

I hope for good news for your biopsy.

I have been recalled for another mammogram with possible ultrasound for an architectural distortion. So I am also freaking out. Back tomorrow for 2nd mammo, and hoping for the best.

Yes you are falling apart. It is a mind numbing thing to hear. Like being sucker punched by a stranger. It leaves you reeling and staggering. Allow yourself the time to feel disconnected and disoriented. Trust the other posters here who say that you will slowly get your feet back under you. Nothing may ever be the same again, but you will still find a way to function and you will navigate your way through. Do not feel rushed. Do not feel pressured. If you need to tell a doctor that you want time to think about it, tell him. This is about you.

This site is a great resource but still be prepared for those bleak moments in the middle of the night when your mind can't go anywhere but to the bleakest, blackest places. We've all been there. Not that that's any comfort. Just know that you are perfectly normal and feeling like a deer caught in the headlights is perfectly normal. I am sorry that you got this news. It is brutal. You will find many people here though who have walked the walk and can talk the talk with you.

nightcrawler - thanks for coming back and posting. So glad you changed hospitals.

Sending all my best wishes to you...

Welcom to BCO Mybabygirls! I am glad that you've found us while you are worried and waiting. We all know how awful that situation can be. In case it is helpful, here is a diagram of the diagnostic process:

Please notice that, generally speaking, your "goal" is NOT to advance to the next level. You are one of the 10% who have advanced to diagnostic workup, but as you can see, approximately 75% of those women are then either told to return to routine or short term follow up, as the risk of their finding being bc is so very low. (BIRADS 3). We try to encourage women to ask for a copy of their imaging report and post any confusion language here, for help in understanding. If you get above a BIRADS 3 (BIRADS 4 or 5) then you will most certainly be referred for a biopsy. Still (see above), approximately 80% of biopsies come back b9. So do prepare yourself, but try not to dwell on worst case scenarios. And do ask any questions you have, we are happy to help!

Oh, that's great! Getting information sooner is always better than later. Keeping all crossed for you!