Newly diagnosed & scared! Thank you for this site!l

Candyapple17
Candyapple17 Member Posts: 36
edited May 2017 in Diagnosed and Waiting for Test Results

I had a suspicious finding on my routine mammo in Jan. Went back in Feb for another mammo and a sono in Feb and then radiologist requested a contrast enhanced mammo. In March I had a core needle biospsy. My PCP told me it was pre-cancerous cells on a mass smaller than 1cm and that I would need a lumpectomy just to get it out. I had that done on 4/11/17. I truly thought it was just pre-cancer cells and that I would be fine because I am very healthy and feel fine. On 4/19/17 - during the post op appt I was told by my BS that I had Stage 2A IDC (ER/PR +, HER-) (2CM mass with positive margins). To say I'm in shock is an understatement. Since then I have met with 2 oncologists and have been assigned a nurse navigator. I had a breast MRI on Friday and am waiting on genetic testing results which should be in early this week.

I am scared but strong and I know I can handle this but the waiting is the hard part. I just want to have a plan. I know I need to have a Sentinel Lymph Node Biopsy to determine if it's spread to the Lymph Nodes but MO indicated she wanted results of MRI and genetics before proceeding. Sigh..

Today is Mother's Day and my 9 year old son gave me a handwritten card (he has no clue yet of what's going on with me- am waiting to know the plan before I talk with him). In the card he thanked me for caring for him, for buying him a fish and thanked me for our couch (random!). At the end of the card, he wrote, "I will always remember you." Now in my mind I know this is just a 9 year old being a 9 year old but reading this freaked me out and the tears are flowing....

I am so thankful for this site and the amazing woman who are sharing their stories. You have given me hope and education. Thank you!

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Comments

  • Brneyegrl6608
    Brneyegrl6608 Member Posts: 85
    edited May 2017

    I am so sorry that you are joining a club nobody wants to be a member. I know how hard this part is - tests, plan in limbo, keeping this secret, but it will get better. The emotional rollercoaster is still there a little for me over a month out from diagnosis, but we have a plan of attack and that has helped immensely. I have four daughters and struggled with what to tell them. They are handling this beautifully and we have tried to normalize this as much as possible in our family. We had a blue hair dye party for me with my daughters before my surgery which was fun and had a lot of laughs. We are gearing up for the head shaving party as well. What I guess I'm trying to say is that it does get better so do what you need to do to get through today (have a long cry in the shower, go for a walk, etc). I'm thinking of you and sending you a virtual hug.

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited May 2017

    Dear Candyapple - We're really sorry for your diagnosis and for what you are going through, but wanted to say welcome! We're glad you've found us and decided to reach out!

    The beginning is really, really hard, we all know, but you'll get through it! Others will surely be happy to weigh in with their advice and support, but in the meantime, you may want to read through the pages of our section designed for those newly diagnosed to help you understand test results, the individual characteristics of the cancer, treatments that are recommended for you, and more. See here: Breast Cancer 101 -- Breastcancer.org.

    The following articles may be of help too if you're planning a conversation with your son:

    Talking to Young Children

    Telling Kids About Cancer


    Please keep us posted on how everything is going, we're thinking of you!

    The Mods

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  • VL22
    VL22 Member Posts: 851
    edited May 2017

    It's a horrible time. I was just diagnosed 4/21 and I believe my surgery is 5/18. What is most difficult to handle IMO is the constant testing and changes in what is going on. I'm also waiting for MRI and genetic testing results, which could change what I think I know at this time and the tentative game plan I have in place. It's frightening, infuriating and just incredibly sad, but it is our reality. I hope you get no more surprises and I know you'll stay strong and get through i, as will I.

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  • Dafne
    Dafne Member Posts: 104
    edited May 2017

    Dear Candyapple, welcome to our sisterhood, although I wish you were not here. Nevertheless, while you are rest assured you will find a lot of info and support. BCO has been a life saver for me, and here I am, just 8 months out of my diagnosis, sharing my two cents with you.

    It sucks. The early time of this journey sucks. Plain and simple. You will be stressed, scared, anxious, frightened, sad, strong, hopefull. It's a crazy rollercoaster, but you know what? It's OK. It's perfectly normal to feel all those crazy emotions, it's natural. You've been diagnosed with cancer, it's no small thing. But I promise you, things WILL get better. Once you take your decisions and have a plan, it will be better. The limbo phase you are now, is the worst. It was for me, and for many more women before us.

    So, take a deep breath and give it some time. Soon enough you'll have all the data in your hands and you'll be able to have a plan in order to do what's best for you.

    In the meantime, educate yourself about your particular cancer, read, take notes about things you might want to discuss with your doctors and enjoy everyday (easier said than done).

    And it's also Ok to cry. But remember to smile too. You got this shit early (We have very similar diagnosis as I see from your signature. Keep up the faith! )

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  • edwards750
    edwards750 Member Posts: 3,761
    edited May 2017

    I am not newly DX more like a veteran of this proverbial roller coaster with the C word. Trust me it does get better. Almost all of us are in a fog in the early going. It's a shock no two ways about it but once that wears off the process usually goes quickly.

    None of us asked for this but we are all strong and courageous women each armed with our own suggestions about getting through it. There are no right or wrong ways to deal with this. We are all herefor the same reason in various grades and stages.

    What I will say that is pretty uniform is reach out to friends, etc for help whatever you need. It's no crime to have needs at a time like this. I did. I had several sounding boards.

    This website is a wealth of information. It has been my lifeline from the getgo.

    Just so you know I am 6 years out this August. I had IDC, Stage 1b, Grade 1. I had a lumpectomy and 33 radiation treatments and took Tamoxifen.

    No guarantees for any of us but keep the faith and keep us posted.

    Diane


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  • Tappermom383
    Tappermom383 Member Posts: 643
    edited May 2017

    Diane, it's so good to hear from someone who has been down a similar path and came through the other end. Congrats on nearly six years!

    MJ

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  • Loveisloveisus
    Loveisloveisus Member Posts: 1
    edited May 2017

    hi everyone


    I have never done this before but sometimes all you have is finding comfort in strangers. I found today my mom has breast cancer. I am trying to be strong but I just feel like I am drowning. And I shouldn't feel this way because she's the one going through it. It feels like I'm living through a lens. I don't know who to speak to and I am still holding on to faith. Or to a wrong diagnosis.



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  • Candyapple17
    Candyapple17 Member Posts: 36
    edited May 2017

    Thank you all for your words of encouragement. You are all so amazing!

    Congrats Diane on 6 years! I hope to be a part of that club someday too!

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