I need my breasts to feed my baby!

Hello, Everybody,

I've been stalking these forums, looking for answers and thought that I might as well just make my own post and see if I can get any reassurance. I'm feeling very anxious (quite terrified, if I am to be honest about it all) and could use someone to talk to. I'm currently nursing my ten-month-old baby (she is our third child and they all loved to breastfeed). I had several plugged milk ducts with this baby that just would not resolve, no matter what I tried. (And I tried EVERYTHING). My midwives finally referred me for an U/S, which happened on 3/15. Everything looked fine, according to the tech and the Radiologist. And yet, I still had a mass in my right breast that was bothering me.

Fast forward to April and things got worse. I could not empty my right breast of milk, no matter what I did. It always felt full and that mass was still there. Then I developed a little lump in my nipple (the size of a small bead that I could feel between my fingers). It made nursing excruciatingly painful, so I consulted with the midwives again. This time they referred me to a breast specialist and an appointment was made. While waiting for that appointment, the pain got to be too much and I called my midwives, begging for help. They referred me for another U/S. This one took place on 4/14.

At this U/S, neither the radiologist nor the tech were at all concerned with the bump in my nipple, nor with the mass in my breast. They only had eyes for an enlarged lymph node with what looked like "draining veins." They were also concerned that I had mastitis (initially I convinced myself that I had IBC, but the antibiotics cleared up the swelling, the redness, and the pain, so I can only assume that it was in fact mastitis).

The breast surgeon (when I finally saw her) reassured me that it is not IBC. She saw no issue with the mass in my breast, and said that the only way to deal with the bump in my nipple would be to cut open my areola and scoop it out, thus ending my nursing on that side. I cried & cried all the way home.

I have also consulted with an MD / GP who is also an IBCLC. She is kind and wants to help me, but thinks that I need to deal with the suspicious lymph node first. Thankfully, a good friend gave me some miraculous aloe gel that has caused the nipple bump to essentially disappear. No more painful nursing - YAY!

I had a core needle biopsy yesterday at the breast center. I have an appointment with the breast specialist on Friday and expect that she may have the pathology report for me then. (If not Friday, then the radiologist who took the biopsy said definitely by Monday). But how can I possibly wait that long?!?

If no one thinks that any of the lumps and bumps in my breast are of concern, then my fear is that this is actually lymphoma. How does a differential diagnosis for the two (BC vs. lymphoma) happen? Can they tell what kind of cancer it is (if it is in fact cancer) just by looking at the biopsy sample?

Any kind words are appreciated. I have three young children and I really need to see them grow up. At the very least, I want my baby to remember who I am. I'm so scared and alone with all of this.

Sally :-(