Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

Chevy, careful with heat. The swelling (and much of the bruising) is inflammation and heat can make it worse. Ice is better. What also helps for bruising (as well as muscle soreness) is arnica gel or cream (whichever is easier on your skin—if you have dry and sensitive skin the cream version is better). My favorite brands are Boiron and CamoCare. And, don’t laugh: tea bags! (Make sure you cool them off first after brewing). The tannins in them help with shrinking the swelling. One upside to your bruising: at least the color combo is patriotic…

Bob and I have decided that as soon as our tax refund is direct-deposited, we are putting the down payment on the trip of a lifetime: next April, a 22-day Viking ocean cruise from Barcelona (with an extra two days there beforehand) to Stockholm. In between? Seville, Lisbon, Porto, Belfast, Dublin, London, Paris, Copenhagen, St. Petersburg and Helsinki. There is a 15-day version that skips Seville (Malaga and Granada instead), Lisbon, London, and all of Scandinavia except Bergen, Norway. (Buying trip cancellation of course…one never knows). He wants to travel while he can still walk well enough—he will need a knee replacement but can’t take off enough time, with sufficient notice to his patients to be able to recuperate and rehab in time for the cruise. So if both of our bodies otherwise cooperate, he will get that knee replaced upon our return.

What really helped him decide was the call he got from one of his former Chief Residents (the one he had a year before our now-PCP): he has late-stage ALS. Not just that: in one of the rival cardiology practices, three out of four doctors developed bladder cancer (one is now Stage IV).

Sandy, you will surely enjoy the river cruise We did one in the Netherlands and do river cruising here in the states. Travel is something we both enjoy..Much as DH grumbles, I plan too soon, he tells everyone what a great time he had, when we return! We don't smoke, drink or gamble, soooo, we travel. As long as we can, both financially and physically. I always joke we are going to lead a tour of ERs in the US. I know so many people that planned to and never got the chance, cuz they put it off! Have a wonderful time.

The real troublemakers are anger, jealousy, impatience, and hatred.With them problems cannot be solved.Though we may have temporary success, ultimately our hatred or anger will create further difficulties.Anger makes for swift solutions.Yet, when we face problems with compassion, sincerity, and good motivation, our solutions may take longer, but ultimately they are better. -The Dalai Lama

Here is the funniest part.............my grandson was in bed sleeping the day I did fallin their front door...........later my daughter said "didn't you hear your Nannie at the front door"...(daughter was outback).......he said "I thought I heard the dog barking, ..then I heard a thump, but went back to sleep".............she said ..."SEAN THAT THUMP YOU HEARD WAS YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S HEAD HITTING THE TILE FLOOR IN THE FOYER"..........LMAO........

Ouch, Chevy! That's quite a "shiner." On a different subject, do you still watch NASCAR?

Sounds like a fabulous trip, Sandy. I hope everything works out well and your travel measures up to expectations. I know you'll be eating some delicious food wherever you go. And drinking good wine, too. 🍷

Jackie, I hope you have a good checkup that indicates you're younger than your age!

Back home with a super good report. I have some other tests that Dr. Liu ordered. Colonoscopy ( ick ) and bone scan as it has been a while. So, I'll do those plus a mammogram and be all set for some time. Glad that all my numbers were good. I asked about some extra supplements ( like Fish oil ) and she said -- with your numbers -- waste of your money. I won't argue the point.

They did have the tree cut up and out of the way when I left but the 22 mile drive there -- in the rain all the way -- wasn't too much fun. I did hydroplane once but watched my speed from then on and all was fine. Glad that is out of the way. No rain on the way home so I stayed on the road and went on into town to feed the feral cats who were waiting --- I guess hoping I would not forget them. I never do and hate if for any reason I have to be late --- but the rain when I left was enough --- they wouldn't have come out anyway.

Sorry about the weather Ducky -- sounds like we may have one more day of this and if your hearing a bit of a whooshing sound it is only a huge, huge sigh from me. Crappy stuff this rainy grey. I have to go pick up Dh from work tonight --- don't really know exactly when, but that is okay. I will just make us a hamburger at home here for supper. We love to make them at home --- flatten out good and throw in a skillet and let them cook with lots of table pepper. I don't know why but they are ( at least to me ) scrumptious done sort of simply like that.

See you all later.

Sandy, which line are you using. Get a lot of info from Oceanic and Viking. DOn't think I can convince DH to go to Europe again, most of our cruising is on the American Queen paddle-wheeler here in the states, Love her! I did a canal boat in England with my daughter before she passed. Loved that one. only 8 people, walking to the next lock, afternoon tea!

My son has been asking me to go on cruises with him for years with his family.......no thank you. ...no out in the middle of the ocean for me.....can't make myself do it...........

He just told me to get a passport.....I asked why.....he told me he bough some type of a villa in some secluded island....they have been there 2 times so far..you walk off their deck and you are in the sand....and the ocean is just feet away, and you have your own pool, butler, chef who comes to your kitchen and cooks your meals....a private car service that takes you wherever you want to go......sounds great huh........NO THANKS......that damn ocean is way to close for my liking.....just looking at the pictures scares me......I like right where I am......not sure how many times I can say "I'm not going" before he gets mad.......LOL......

Ducky, maybe your son should adopt one of us to go in your place! Some people are not suited to travel. We are glad we made our bucket list trip to Australia and New Zealand. It does take some preparation and energy, not to mention $$$ to travel. You also have to be tolerant and flexible to some degree.

Carol money is not the problem for me or for my son.......and I know what yuo mean about the expense, I just have a few "fears", "phobia's"......whatever, and once I am where i am going I'm fine....its the anticipation of the entire journey...LOL...mainly the flight if is by air.......I cannot get over the fear of flying...I have another son who goes to Disneyworld at least 3/4 times a year...has asked me everytime........again, I have not gone...again its the flight.......I have flown 3 times..the first to Chicago for my grandson's wedding...scared to death, but I did it......my daughter said "perfect flying weather for a "first timer"......2 nd time not quite as good......3rd time horrible..rain, lightning, turbulance, horrible......have not flown since....with the cruise its the fear of a storm coming and being in the middle of the ocean in a ship........so its not money, preparation, energy.......its the getting there and back.............and I hate the way I am, cause once I am there, I have a ball.

This is how bad I am...26 years ago when my husband had pancreatic cancer by his bedside I told him if he got better we would do anthing he wanted.....he said "even going to Hawaii".......I said "absolutely"......well he had surgery, really did fantastic..and one day said to me "are you ready for Hawaii, remember your promise you said if I got better we would go".........I said "I lied".......never went...and of course 2 years 9 months later he passed away......so you can see how bad I am.

Well Ducky, we are allowed to have irrational fears because they do on occasion happen. Our chances -- likely pretty slim, but tell that to yourself and believe it. I use to fly so much -- when I was in the service. Then --- once out --- VERY seldom. My daughter sent a ticket for me ( second vacation in 40 yrs. or more ) after I had completed my cancer txs. I was not only VERY nervous about flying and mainly uncomfortable with it, but just as difficult for me to find my way around the airport. Something that was SO easy for me when I was young.

If you don't do some things -- at least on a once in awhile basis -- it can be really off-putting and difficult even if you don't have a phobia. I love the water and find it so very soothing and healing --- but a little like you, I think I would find it difficult ( at times ) to know I was in the middle of the ocean and anything could happen. I hated flying over the ocean in a plane and the thoughts that brought. I can't imagine myself a whole lot better thought wise if I were actually on the ocean. On the shore --- the water almost becomes me and I can be very much in time and in tune with it --- but not sure if the circumstances were different.

I found this website today and want to participate in the older people with bc area. I am 65 and 10 months ago I noticed a swollen lymph node in my armpit. I was told it was most likely breast cancer. I decided not to treat, no biopsy, no surgery, no chemo, no radiation. The condition is progressing. There is discomfort and the unknown factors (what's next in this slow deterioration and how long have I got?) are a concern. Is there anyone else out there that has made this decision?

I decided not to treat for it seems going that route would put me in the cogs of the "breast cancer machine" that has developed within the local hospital. The initial contact people I met, the surgeon and the "cancer counselor" were more like robots to me than healers. It was a creepy experience that left me cold. The most uplifting contact I have had was a holistic healer that I talked to that actually asked me questions about emotional pain I might be carrying around.

I hope this is enough information to give someone the gist of what I am experiencing and if you are going through this too maybe we can communicate?

Wow, tough one to comment on since most of us have gone the route of "do whatever it takes to stay alive".....is it rough.....yes, but so is life.....it all depends on what you want from life.......I want to see my already older children grown older, all my 18 grandchildren graduate, marry have children (which they already have bless me with 6 great-grandchildren, and 2 more due soon),....I have to many things in my life to see before I am ready to say "I'm ready"......nothing in life is really easy....but that is a decsion we all have to make on our own........no one can tell you what is best for you........I spoke with my children 6 years ago, and I decided I would do what ever it took...........

I said "take them both".....my Dr. said "the decision is yours"......but that is not necessary.......after much thinking, I had a lumpectomy.....38 rounds of Rads which I did great with, and then on to Femara......that was a tough daily pill, and after 4 years I stopped it..........I still wonder if I did the right thing going off it........but can't imagine what I would have faced everyday had I chose to do nothing about the tumor I had...........

The tumor was smaller then thought, and the surgery to remove the tumor could not have gone better.....I gave myself a chance, and after 6 years I am glad I did.........everyone has to make their own decision, but that is how I feel.......all the stories are not bad ones......you have to decide.......only you can made that choice........good luck with whatever you decide

Northstar, to the best of my knowledge just mainly got this thread started and didn't stay. I hope someone will be able to answer your questions, but I'm not aware of anyone on here that has traveled a path like yours. We each do what we feel is best for our personal situations. We don't judge here and feel your decisions and your need for them is best left in your hands. I hope you'd understand though likely a lot of us would feel that maybe you could maybe get recommendations about other hospitals, or Dr.'s or professionals in your area to help you fill in some possible blanks.

Also there are many meds that could help you -- no matter which path you may choose. I would not be anxious to take the word of anyone who would give out a dx. of it is MOST likely cancer if the tests to prove this had not been done. Lymph nodes 'react' to a lot more than just cancer.

The axillary (arm pit) lymph nodes filter and/or trap lymph from the arm, chest wall and breast. It is often difficult to feel normal axillary lymph nodes. Not all enlarged axillary lymph nodes feel the same. It is also important to mention that enlarged axillary lymph nodes are not necessarily a sign of cancer. However, we strongly advise you to consult with a medical provider if you are concerned about enlarged axillary lymph nodes.

Enlarged axillary lymph nodes may stem from a range of causes. If a patient does not have cancer, some of the local, non-cancerous causes of enlarged axillary lymph nodes include:

• An injury to the armpit, arm or hand (almost always non-cancerous).
• Localized infection or hydradenitits.
• Brucellois (also known as Undulant fever, Malta fever and/or Mediterranean fever): a bacteria disease picked up from contact with dogs, cows, goats, pigs or other mammals. Brucellois can be contracted consuming unpasteurized dairy products.
• Cat Scratch Disease: cats infected with bartonellahenselae can transfer the bacteria to humans by piercing their skin (bite or scratch). The illness may result in fatigue, a fever, headache(s) and a loss of appetite. Most of the time the body can expunge the infection without medical treatment.
• Silicone breast implants: a reaction by the lymphatic system to the placement of a foreign substance (including the small possibility of a silicone leak).

Systematic, non-cancerous causes of enlarged axillary lymph nodes include:

• Viral infections: mononucleosis, chicken pox, measles, HIV/AIDS and others.
• Bacterial: tuberculosis, etc.
• Fungal.
• Temporary side effects from a vaccination.

I would do the tests needed to really find out why you have a swollen node. It could be very easy to treat -- and all discomfort erased fairly easily and quickly. The mind will go along with what you think or are basically telling it. There is no way for it to know --- if you don't help it along with GOOD solid information. I would urge this for you but again --- you are the one living your life and only you can decide.

I hope you will come back and let us know a bit more. We would be VERY happy to support you and your decisions whatever they may be. You are a very important person.

Bonnets......so sorry to hear about your daughter.......how hearbreaking......I just don't know what else to say......

Illinois...your right about listening to someone would say "its most likely cancer".....even after seeing my tumor clearly on the ultrasound my Dr. said "if I was a betting man I would say it is cancer becaue of the sphere coming off of the tumor, but we will not know for certain untile we biopsy it.....he knew, but even then he would not say absolutely......and he was right.......and mine was clear from an ultrasound.......an infected hangnail can cause an armpit lymph node to swell...

I was fortunate enough to be 15 minutes from a Fox Chace REgional Cancer Center.....many are not.....but I sure would look for the closest facility that would have been if this wee not the case......

Everyone must make their own decision, but my first would be to find another Dr