Some questions about breast forms

Sothursty, you bring up a lot of big, and important questions.

1. Probably worth trying a lightweight form (foam). They are definitely lighter, washable, and could be a good option for you.

2. Have you contacted Nearly You? They provide a lot of help, which could work for your situation. http://www.nearlyou.com/?v=47e5dceea252

3. Naturally, a sensitive issue - and very dependent on the partner, what you share beforehand.

4. You should be able to find bras that have the correct pocket size, and styles, to accommodate a prothesis, without it showing. Where have you shopped? Again, try Nearlyyou.com?!

5. Another very personal choice, but perhaps worth getting the details on how much it would really cost, and the recovery period.

Glad you found us, and thanks for sharing!

You may find other ideas here: Prosthetics

Have you looked at Amoena contact form? Ir has sticky on the edges and sticks to your chest. You can wear with any bra and does not move around. Mine is called Balance Contact Delta. They cone in different shapes. Mine is hollow in back to even out asymmetry.

I had a bilateral mastectomy 7 weeks ago and have been to 3 different establishments that claim to provide mastectomy products. I was given several places by treatment center. I called the one most likely to have several different products because they advertised everything. I was very disappointed, it was unprofessional and not very sympathetic to my personal issues. I brought clothes to wear but was told on the phone I could only bring one shirt, they only had an hour to spend with me. I explained my purpose was to be able to wear my former clothes. I recently (before my breast cancer) bought 4 new bathing suits and was hoping to be able to wear them as well as my blazers and bras.

I was a 42 DD. I am now completely flat. 37 inches around my chest.

I arrived at 10 am for my 10 am appointment and was met with a lot of commotion and a room full of people (5-6). Men and women both. I walked in and there was a woman behind the counter talking with another woman. I walked up to the counter, they continued to talk, no welcome or smiles or even an acknowledgement that I was there as they continued their conversation. I was within 2 feet of these employees, they could not have missed me. Eventually she asked me my name, and I stated I had an appointment for 10. She nodded, and continued her conversation with the other employee and as she talked to her, she motioned for me to look another direction and said I was to go with her.

There was no hi my name is or welcome to our store. I dutifully followed this person to a back room that looked more like a storage warehouse area. She was busily adjusting things, putting things away, and closing doors as I just stood there watching her. Then I decided to sit down, but was never invited to. Then she sat next to me busily got out paperwork and began firing questions at me (never did introduce herself) and demanding ID as well as insurance card. I expected to share those with her, but it just wasn't very welcoming or nice. Then she asked a lot of personal questions as well as my social security number, and I really was uncomfortable giving out my personal info. Why she needed to know my marital status and if I was in a relationship is beyond me. I was not asking for credit and they are not my doctor and my insurance pays in full.

Next she stated I was to take off my clothes as she left the room to copy my personal papers. She never told me what to take off or even why, I assume my coat, shirt and upper undergarments. There was no cover up to wear. The door was large and I would be visible to anyone on the other side when it opened. I sat there for a while, then decided this was not for me. I am just not ready for this yet. I just got up and asked for my papers back and left. I told them I just wasn't ready. Then I cried in the car and left with tears. It was bad. But I do need to be able to wear my clothes.

A few days later, I tried again at a Wright and Philippis out of town. I arrived on time and waited about 15 minutes. It was much more professional. I was called back to get fitted. I told her my former size and said it is most important I can fill out my clothes, but all the larger breast forms created a huge gap between my chest and the bra. They said that is the way they fit. So I left there with nothing. I did finish the appointment. I did not cry. I was more frustrated. Should there be a 1/2 in to 3/4 inch gap on your chest where I can see the breast form inside the bra, and so could anyone taller than me standing next to me?

Next, I went to a university teaching hospital prosthetic department. I had an hour appointment with them as well. It wasn't much better than Wright and Phillipis. However she was able to fit the bra next to my chest if I chose to be a "B" cup. Well, I was a "DD" that just is not going to do anything for my clothes. She thought I looked great in the "B". She seemed very upset, that I had too much criteria and she just doesn't have what I want. I wanted the bra to fit the prosthetic and fit against my chest with no gaps and fill out my clothes. At least a D, if a C fits my clothes, then a C. I don't want a padded bra or one with a wire, I was told no wires by my doctors. I also want the breast form to be in front of me and not wider than I am. I can't be comfortable with breasts that point outward towards my underarms. I never had my breast where I could feel them under my arms and that to me is just weird. She kept trying to fit the wrong breast forms in a different sized bra, using a B cup bra with a C or D prosthetic. They did not stock enough for larger people. So I left there with nothing as well.

Is there a way to find a prosthetic and a bra to fit? I can't use the internet, I won't know how it fits. I also need them to take my blue cross PPO. I can't believe this is so hard.

carmstr835, I feel you pain. One year after the BMX I'm still wearing the post op prosthetics. It's about time I find some real ones but I don't know what to choose. My breast used to be size D, I went to foams size C. Lately I tried my old bras again (no I hadn't thrown them) and they just didn't feel like me anymore.

I got two different types of prothetics to try out from the fitter but I'm torn. The one is light weighted and feel natural. But it's also saggy. The other one is from more stif silicone, is a little heavier but looks great under clothes. I was hoping to find a post with experiences from others.

Good luck in finding a shop that can help you. You were right to walk out of the first one. Maybe size D or C can work for you. And maybe finding someone to help you with taking in some of your new clothes.

I was happy with the first set of silicone forms I got after surgery, and have reordered the same ones as needed over the years. But it took me longer to find a bra that held them the way I wanted. I didn't like them moving, falling forward, riding up, etc. Luckily, I don't have any residual pain along my scars or in my chest, so what I ended up with was a "long line" bra from TLC Direct. The band is wider, and rides lower than regular bras, so it doesn't slip. It's not super low cut/demi in the front, so I can't wear low cut or wide scoop-necks, but regular V-necks, t-shirts, button ups, etc. cover it completely. I just keep ordering the same bras over & over because nothing else works for me.

They also make a long line version of their "especially for you" bras - bras with pockets that are pre-filled with lightweight beads - that I really want to try. Those really seem like they'd stay close to the body and not gap at the top.

Carnstr, your story hurts to read, and I hate that you were treated so badly. Do any of your local hospitals have a "women's shop"? That's common here, but maybe not where you are. If you decide to risk it on an online purchase, I know TLC lets you return anything that doesn't work for you, and their prices are much more reasonable than what I purchased (and didn't like) from the fitter. Best of luck to you.

If you are not happy you should tell your insurance company so they can refer you to someone else. Will they pay for and do you have a Nordstrom's close by? I am lucky the place they sent me, lady was nice, perfect fit and large size bra's in decent design and color.l

I also wear one form on one side. I think the key to the right fit is to keep trying different forms and bras until you find something that works for you.

I started with a professionally fitted silicone form, but I didn't find that it gave the right shape and fit. So I took a risk and ordered another silicone foam online and I was glad that it was just what I wanted. I also have a foam form and a microbead form, but the silicone still gives the best shape, though it's heavier. I also tried different mastectomy bras and there were a few which I liked and I bought a few more and in different colours.

I thought black bras are quite discreet - others can't tell if it is a pocket edge or the bra, or if there's a gap between the bra and the chest.

I am another who had a UMX. Luckily my fitter was kind and very understanding of what I wanted. While I am a larger woman my cup size is typically an A or sometimes a B. She spent a lot of time with me after ordering several different bras and forms to see what would work as what they had on hand did not work. I ended up with an Amoena form too. I liked the look because it had a slight natural "drape(or droop) to it that my natural breasts had. I did not want the foob side standing up at attention when the other side could not get that perky no matter what I wore. I have to admit that I did not like the weight of the full silicone foob. After having it just a couple of weeks I went on the TLC website and ordered the one that was part silicone and part microbead. I do like the weight a lot better. Sometimes I wear the silicone one under certain clothes because it looks a little better. I found it interesting that the place I had mine fitted for charged $100 more than if I had ordered the same one from TLC's website. tsk tsk. I have tried several different types of bras and am still figuring out which are my favorites. I love TLC's return policy and when I have called to ask for information they have been very helpful.

I like the cheapie bra from Walmart idea and will try that too. Thanks!

I was told I should not use "just" a foam form all the time because the difference in the weight since I had a UMX might cause back problems down the road. When I am home lounging during the weekends I either put in my knitted knocker (and they do sometimes itch)or nothing at all.

I do have a few tops that the mastectomy bras tend to show a bit from so I have ordered little semi-cami things to hook to the bra strap and seal off any peeking out. if anyone is interested I can give you the website where I bought those.

~Heidi

Well, it didn't go well at all. She said she had ordered some bigger prosthesis, but she brought out the size 8 with a 42 D bra. 42 size 8 is a B cup, she told me it was a D. I just looked it up it is B cup, she lied. I thought it looked very small. I tried on my blazer, and it didn't look very good to me, however she said it looked great. I put on my t shirt and the material rode up my chest all wrinkled, I would have to keep straightening it all day long. I never had that issue before, I always filled out my T-shirts. I was 42 DD and 5'10". She informed me that if I didn't find anything I liked, I did not have to buy anything.

However, after 10 minutes of trying things, she said that I had to decide if I wanted it. (she was 20 minutes late, and this appointment had lasted only 10 minutes.) I asked if I could think about it. I will call her, that this was the best so far, but I am not sure this is what I wanted at least not sure right now. They really don't fill out my clothes, I know they will be hot in the summer, and then I will have 5 weeks of radiation in September and something this heavy might not be what I am looking for. She informed me if I didn't buy anything now she was going to charge me personally for the fitting $52.00. My insurance company is supposed to pay for my prosthesis, I guess if your not happy, they charge you, not the insurance company, therefore they force you to buy them. $52 to me or $500 to the insurance company. That is black mail.

I called my insurance company, and put in a complaint. They will investigate it. But the sad thing is, how many other women have they forced into buying these? And this is a Medical school type University Prosthetic clinic. I think they must be paid by commission. At least she sure seemed to believe this was her personal property and it was a lot of work for her to help me. My insurance only pays for 2 prosthetic breasts each 12 months, I would be stuck with these for a very long time, and if I am healthy next year, it would cost me my deductible that is pretty big, to get another pair in 12 months. Let's just say, I probably would not get anymore for quite a while.

https://www.mastectomyshop.com/pages/Amoena-Breast...

These forms she had there were this brand (amoena)... so these are the sizes she lied about. I saw the size 8 on the box. The bra was 42. I am thinking that is too big of a band on that bra as well for my chest that measures now 37 inches. I have no idea, I just know that I was not happy or comfortable and felt she was trying to force me to buy them.Taking advantage for sure.

I also drove 2 1/2 hours each way to go to these 2 appointments, it isn't like I enjoy wasting my time. I never should have gone back today. I will learn not to trust my instincts.

I hope no one else ever has to deal with this person, I will push the insurance investigation, not for me, but for everyone after me.

Carm - nobody should be treated like that...and then to make you pay them for it?!!? I'm glad you filed a complaint, but I know that doesn't help you get what you need right now. I'm so sorry.

Carmstr, where are you located? There is a place in Dallas called The Maddox Shop you might try if you are anywhere close.

I've never tried them, but I've seen them at TLC:

TLC Direct