My Aunt Told Me She Cannot Be A Support For Me
Hello. I'm wondering if anyone has had a close family member push them away after being diagnosed with breast cancer. My Aunt who I have always been extremely close with did just that to me 3 weeks ago. She's a 10 year survivor of breast cancer. When I got diagnosed back in February I just assumed she would be a rock for me. Sharing with me what she changed in her diet, supplements and lifestyle to heal. I've always been there for her. Even making a trip down to be with her after her surgeries to help with housework and be a support.
Last November my Aunt was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. She's been managing it beautifully through diet and natural supplements. I have been there for her every step of the way. I know she's been struggling with it. She thinks that God is punishing her for losing 90 pounds in the last two years.
When I got diagnosed with Breast Cancer I started noticing that she would call and go on and on about her diabetes. I would listen and be supportive. She would seldom ask me how I was doing. Than 3 weeks ago she told me she will not be there for me.
In short this is what happened:
Three weeks ago I shared with my Aunt about the MRI I had just had done that day. She stopped me. She told me she did not want to hear anything more about my Cancer. That I was only to share with her only good news about my Cancer progress.
This took the wind out of me. I could not believe that someone that I love so much, someone that I have always been there for, someone that even though I am going through something life threatening, I still have enough love and compassion to be there for them. To champion them and help them through their tough time.
I asked for clarity and asked her "so what you are telling me is that if I get bad news you will not be there to support me?"
She said "Correct, I cannot be there for you. I need to focus on me."
I said "But I have no one else to talk to"
She said "I understand, but I need you to understand that I just can't be there for you. It's bringing up too many old thoughts."
She asked me to understand. I don't understand. No one could understand this.
She went on to say "that the Satan comes at you in all forms" insinuating that Satan was working through me with my Cancer to undermine her faith and her healing progress and that she could not allow this.
My Aunt is a very religious person. She has great faith, which I admire. I have faith and believe in God as well. I believe compassion is very high on what I think God wants from us. I am completely perplexed and devastated by this. I miss my Aunt. There's not a day that goes by that I wish that she was there to talk to.
Comments
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So sorry to hear. Unfortunately it's too traumatic for her to re-live it all again through you, so she only wants to hear positives. I'm sure she still loves and cares about you. A relationship like that doesn't just go away. It's too much for her to handle. Meanwhile you found this board which is great support.
My family doesn't know about my bc. It would be too much for them and for me in terms of anxiety overload for both parties. My bro is the exception but he's 400 miles away and so busy with his work that I hardly communicate with him anyway. I know part of it too is it's tough for him to handle so once a week I'll text him and he responds with best wishes. So I did it on my own. I was lucky to have a great supportive medical team along with this board to get info and support from, so really, I wasn't alone.
I hope your aunt comes around, but if not, she still loves you and just can't handle it. Some people just need to pull away in order to not go down. My bro did this to me the first time when I was put in a psych ward for anxiety. Didn't hear from him my entire stay. I was hurt but found out later that it would have done him in to have interacted with me because he was so crushed. I both understand and don't understand why he pulled away when I was at my lowest, but I let it go and we are fine. I just know that while he loves me dearly and cares, he just isn't mentally equipped to be the kind of support that I need so I look for it here or my medical team. I hope you come to understand her if only for your own peace as hard as it is. It was for me but in order for me to keep my stuff together, I had to accept that that's the way he is and it doesn't mean he doesn't love and care about me.
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Thank you for the kind words Artista928. I know she loves me. I also know that if I were a friend of hers in her prayer group she would never have pushed me away. She would be there for me. I see her stand strong behind the people she calls "her mothers and sisters in the lord." This is the hardest part. It makes me feel like there is something wrong with me.
I am grateful for this group. I am grateful for so much. This I just can't understand. What it has taught me is what I never want to be or do. I never want to be so self involved that I am not there for others. To always be compassionate and to never abandon anyone who reaches out to me.
Thank you all for letting me share.
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I don't agree with Artista. I just can't reconcile that excuse thatit's too tough to handle. That is so all about yourself IMO. No one said it would be easy. You were there for your aunt and now she can't cope with your illness. I'm sure she does love you but that's selfish of her to put what she can handle ahead of the pain you are going through.
No one ever wants to be accountable for decisions they make. It's always someone else's fault or something else that is offered up as an excuse. I cannot imagine being able to live with myself with that attitude.
You can gloss over your hurt feelings anyway you choose but the fact is no matter what you have the right to feel hurt. What about your listening to her diabetes DX? How would she feel if you cut her off and concentrated on your DX?
I have a close friend whose brother has been DX with kidney failure. He has to go to dialysis 3X a week not to mention lots of doctors appointments. He can't drive and can barely see. She has had a mancave built for him in her backyard because he wants to store his books and paintings there and just kind of escape. It's not an eyesore but it still takes up a lot of her backyard.
My friend and her brother never got along growing up for a myriad of reasons but since he has been sick she has opened up her home to him and become his caregiver. He has no one else. Her life has been turned upside down. She endures his ungrateful attitude and selfishness but she still does it because it's the right thing to do.
So my point is if you care enough you put aside your own feelings for the sake of someone you care about.
Diane
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yhendrix- That is a great attitude you have there. You learned something about yourself from this experience. Focus on the positives gained not just in this situation but any others you come up against. If we can take something a way from something that we don't understand, that's a good thing, because there will be instances in life where we just don't get something.
You are a good person. Helping others when you can helps not only them but does wonders for you too. Too bad she's missing out on that but we can't fault her for needing to step away in this instance for her own sake. Best wishes. xxx
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wow....I'm just so sorry your aunt has done this to you. I do think it is incredibly selfish of her considering all you have shared. I think for your own sake you need to accept the situation and try to reach out to others if you can. This board is a great tool and a support system.
Personally if this happened to me I'd pull way back from her. If she needs to put up this type of boundary for her protection fine, but you need to be able to express yourself without censoring what you say in fear of hurting her. This is me though. I just can't imagine doing this to someone I care about.
Take care and keep sharing here!
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I wonder if your aunt’s pastor has gotten to her (this “Satan” business, especially). More than that I will not say lest I incur the wrath of the moderators.
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BS on your aunt. To turn her back on you at this time is so unchristian in my opinion. You never know who will be there when something like this happens. I called my parents when diagnosed and then didn't hear from them for over a month or two.BS.
If it makes you feel good to continue a relationship with your aunt you should, but protect your heart.
Sending you a gentle and supportive hug. We get it.
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Thank you all so much. It is a really difficult day for me. I got the results of my MRI the very next day after the phone call with my Aunt. There was good news and bad news. Good news was that they saw no more IL in my left breast. Bad news was that they saw a small smooth shadow in my right. The RO and my doctor both feel that it is nothing because of it's smooth edges. They think it may be a lymph node. I go in tomorrow for a mammogram to look closer at it. Depending on what they see they may or may not do a sonogram. I am terrified and so heartbroken. My journey has only just begun and to have been dealt this blow by my Aunt, who I spoke with 2-3 times a week for most of my adult life, is at times unbearable. I will have a second lumpectomy on May ll and 4 weeks of radiation has been scheduled beginning the first week of July. At this stage there is no good news to share. Only coping and living life the best you can.
At this point I am not going to pick up the phone and call my Aunt. I wrote her a very heartfelt email the very next day. One filled with love & compassion while expressing how badly she hurt me. I did not mention religion. She never responded. I never thought my Aunt would be so cruel. I see her to be so compassionate with everyone else in her church circle. Do I reach out to her pastor?
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Your aunt is a perfect example of why I no longer trust most religious people. How she could possibly throw Satan talk into any discussion of your interactions with her is beyond me. Even if it brings up difficult memories to reconsider BC, as a close and loving relative - she should rise to the occasion. Choosing to concentrate on her diagnosis of diabetes rather than support you seems pretty selfish and self-serving to me. And as a Christian - pretty un-Christ-like.
I believe that if there is a God - he or she is much bigger and better than any religion makes them out to be!
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I'm so sorry for this painful time you're experiencing. Your aunt is handling things poorly, in my opinion. Regardless of how hard it may be for her, the right, kind, compassionate, loving thing to do is for her to be there for you. Maybe she can't be "all in" because it triggers her own anxiety, but it's cruel to cut you off. I'm a Christian, and the Scripture teaches that believers are to draw near to the broken-hearted and help bear their burdens. Your aunt can't or won't do this for you, despite you doing it for her, and I think it's terribly sad. Unfortunately, I have experienced something very similar from a sibling who apparently doesn't care about my diagnosis and treatment. I've given so much to him and his family in terms of relationship and support, and when I could have used his support (and expertise...he's a physician!), he went radio silent.
So you have my sympathy and I believe you're justified in feeling hurt.
Now you need to close that door and seek people who are strong and loving enough to walk you through this time. You will be amazed at the people who do step up to meet your needs when you share your dx with them. It won't help you to dwell on the pain your aunt has caused you; instead, draw your strength from your faith, from this community, from real life friends, and your medical team. While it will always hurt when you think of your aunt's behavior, it won't hurt as badly as time goes on.
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Surround yourself with only positive things and people from here on out. If it were me, I wouldn't reach out to the pastor either. You need to think of yourself only and let go of negative unhealthy ties. You did a great thing emailing her so at least she knows.
I found on my own journey how very kind strangers were to me, esp when you say you are doing it yourself. So reach out to people. You'll be surprised that there are strangers who actually care and would love to help.
This just confirms my distaste for organised religion.
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One thing I have learned over the past almost 6 years and talking with literally thousands of cancer patients, there always seems to be one person who shocks you that runs away from you and cannot be there for you. Unfortunately, your aunt is the person for you. I am so very sorry. The hurt and betrayal are beyond belief. For me, the people who ran from me were worse than going through cancer.
But there will be other people who will come forth and support you that will also shock you!! Often, they are not even close friends. But by the time things are done, they will be!
This is one of the hardest and toughest lessons of cancer. Sending all my best to you!
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Denise, I agree with you that the people who have basically abandoned me at this time is almost worse the the DX. I would never ever do that to someone I loved.
yHendrix, I agree the your Aunt is being very selfish and cruel. That is such a weak excuse for slamming you down that way. While what Artista says may be true, that she still loves and cares about you, that is one hell of a way to show it. When people love and care about you they show up for you in good times and especially bad times. It's a two way street and she received support and sympathy from you for her current health problems. That is such tough one but I too would be waiting for her to make a very apologetic and compassionate call before I ever called her again.
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Yhendrix, I feel very much for you. And yes you are right to acknowledge your pain and your hurts. Unfortunately it is true that some people who have been through the diagnosis themselves, find it unable to cope with a relative getting the same diagnosis. And there is really little that you can do to change that. I'm sire that it doesn't mean that she doesn't love you anymore. Far from it. But it does leaving feeling raw that they are not willing to help and empathise as you have done.
I felt a bit raw myself when I had told my sister my diagnosis shortly before going into surgery and I could feel her just go all cold on me. My BF pointed out to me that my sister was just 17 when she lost our mother to bc, then our aunt was diagnosed 10 years later, 6 months ago my dad's friend died of bc, and my sister was likely seeing all crash around her. It was only last week that she realised that I had not had a lumpectomy but a bilateral mastectomy. She was in fact shocked and told me I had said it was a small operation, and I cooly answered that no I mentioned surgery but you never asked what surgery I was having! And by the way my sister lives 10 minutes away. And I know she will be devastated if anything happens to me. But I also accept that at present she cannot cope too well. I have also raised fears for her own health especially as her kids are aged 1 and 3.
But now back to you. I think it's important to acknowledge your pain without letting it take over. You're going to need your energy to take care of your own health. You don't mention other relatives or friends. Do you have other friends you are close to? Are you part of a church yourself? And are there people who will support you? You will be surprised how many people may be ready to help you even if they just offer an ear. I was surprised by the number of people offering to help, coming to see me in hospital, messaging, sending flowers etc. Also these boards are great. So many times I come hear for a rant and know that I am not alone!
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Sounds like to me she is being very selfish and has gone off the deep end...saying Satan stuff about your cancer.
Bet she will be calling you to support Her
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My heart goes out to you that you have to deal with this rejection as well as BC. This is a time when you need all the support you can get. I could almost give your aunt a pass if your BC was more than she could handle, but when I read that she would react totally differently if it were to happen to someone in her prayer circle I get a little pissed. I know those "types" of people. How dare she say that Satan was coming through you to get to her (that's essentially what she is saying here). As if you didn't have enough on your plate to deal with. SMH. And the fact that she brings all of her diabetes issues to you WHILE you are going through BC is wrong too. I just can't deal with these types of people Just pure selfishness on your aunts part. If it were me, I'd have to cut my aunt off...at least until I finished with my treatments. I just couldnt' deal with the nonsense.
~Dee
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I am working on letting go. It's difficult. I might be able to understand it better if my Aunt also shied away from the women in her church and prayer group who have been diagnosed with BC or worse. Better for me though if I don't try and understand it, but move on.
Things I'm thankful for: my Mom (she's a rock for me), my life partner Kim (he's a rock for me), my friend Linda who went through BC last year, my friend Margie who I work with on a fantastic music festival in Santa Cruz, my friend Cloud who I also work with on a great music festival here in NorCal, and to the dozens of others and to all of you ladies here. Thank you.
What tomorrow brings none of us know. What we can do is deal with today with grace and beauty. I will always love my Aunt, but feel she is gone forever from my life. It's my way of moving on past the pain. If I remember her as she was. In a time when she was supportive.
Maybe a long primal scream in the forest will be a good thing to do just about now. Get it all out. Yell, scream, cry, laugh, throw things. Life is an interesting journey.
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Hello fellow Bay Area-er. This is a fun area as the festivals are upon us. Glad you have great support.
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Wow that is harsh. I'm sorry, but I feel your Aunt is being really cruel. She must be 3 floats short of a full parade to bring up Satan crap. I just don't have any sympathy for someone who says they cannot support you during this time. She is selfish. I'm a little annoyed at my own mother. I don't really feel she was there when I was diagnosed. I think she called me once - rude. One of my brother's as well - never called me once even though I called him every single day when he had quadruple bypass surgery and went to visit. Thankfully, my other brother and sister were there even if just to talk to. I don't understand people sometimes. Hang in there.
Hugs,
Nancy
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In my experience christians are the WORST at empathy and make religious meanings where none exists. if I am being kind it sounds to me that your Aunt has some residual PTSD and your experience is triggering painful memories and re stimulating things she may not have processed fully...
My only child, who I raised alone, abandoned me 4 months in to diagnosis and 5 years on I now know we are estranged forever........he knew I was having tests for mets and never once called or anything.......I hope he really regrets it one day but for now I am just getting on with living, its fresh at the moment as its 5 years since my surgery......and I still hate how I am.....
If its any consolation you have a lot more support than I had and I am still around......take good care of you and leave your aunt to her chosen strategy of keeping herself emotionally safe instead of taking the genuinely Christian option and walking in your shoes.......its her loss
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There's Christians and there's Christians. There's Jews and there's Jews. There's Muslims and there's Muslims and many other groupings of people. Each group contains people with many different ideas about what their identity means to them. Is it an accident of birth? Culture? History? Is it a very personal belief that one follows or a label that has been given to you by others? Are we all enemies? Do we offer ourselves as potential friends? Do we seek to force our beliefs on others? When someone says, "I am a ——." Do we really know anything about them at all? or do we only assume that we do? Is everyone with a particular label the same? Let's be very careful especially given the current times
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I have a friend that has done the same thing , while she is supportive she had definitely distanced herself from me . This friend just went through this whole BC mess less then 2 yrs ago so Im thinking its bring up lots of bad memories and causing her anxiety. While it has hurt my feeling, I do understand the fear it can bring up in someone that is just starting to get it together . Hopefully your aunt will get past this and realize what she is doing to you . I pray that if the day ever comes where someone close gets BC I can be stronger then that and help them as much as possible from my own experience.
Huggs
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yhendrix, I'm sorry you find yourself torn by your aunt's behavior. I make no excuses for her, but perhaps she suffers from PTSD and cannot deal with someone she loves facing the same thing she had. Perhaps she can disconnect herself enough to listen to someone in her small group, but she loves you and feels personally for you. She probably could use some counseling but you will not be able to force it. Be good to yourself and let the people you mentioned be the support you need for now. Your aunt may come around later.
I agree with Sara, we are not able to overgeneralize and label whole groups with the same characteristics. Everyone is an individual and we only love and understand them when we start and build a relationship with them. Trust comes from that relationship and, unfortunately, your aunt broke that trust and will need to rebuild the relationship with you and you with her. All the best as you move forward in your BC journey and perhaps reestablishing a good relationship with your aunt.
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My heart cries for each one of you who has had to go through what I am going through. What a cruel twist. It is most definitely harder to deal with than the BC. I never cried when I got diagnosed. Always the optimist with a positive outlook. I now find myself crying daily. It's been nearly a month since I last spoke with my Aunt. I just saw the current bulletin and prayer list put out by her church. Her name and my Uncles moms names are both on it. Will it ever get easier?
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Hi yhendrix:
Hugs to you. It is devastating when your closest people who you thought would be there for you if anything happened, are not there for you.
My family, mother and sisters, who I thought were my best friends and we always swore we would be there for each other, disappeared when I was dx with my BC 13 years ago. In fact, my one sister told me "why are you so upset, it will take a couple of years to kill you" and then never called or asked about me or anything. My other sister decided to plan her wedding after she heard I had BC and was very upset that I was unable to attend because I was in my 8th round of chemo and couldn't travel. And my mother. I was so hurt by her. So hurt. I have been dx again with BC and my family still does not call, does not support. I see them interacting on Facebook and nothing to me. So I completely understand your pain.
Even though I have resentment about this, I have learned that people who are the closest to you sometimes cannot handle watching you suffer or are afraid of losing you and will back away and it is their issue and has nothing to do with rejecting you. Its all about their issues. This comforts me. But it does not remove the hurt and disappointment.
I have coped by coming to this site, not sharing my BC news with most people I know (so I will not be disappointed if they do not respond how i would like), and by sharing my BC with my medical team, support groups in person, and those in my closest circle who know about my BC and do offer to help. As for my husband, who also acted distant at my first BC, I tell him now what I need and he does respond.
Unfortunately, a dx of a life threatening illness such as BC cancer shows who will be there for you and where you truly stand in your relationship with them. It sucks, but its reality.
Again, I am so sorry you are going through this disappointment too. It is very painful. Reach out here and talk about it. It will help.
wallan
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"Even though I have resentment about this, I have learned that people who are the closest to you sometimes cannot handle watching you suffer or are afraid of losing you and will back away and it is their issue and has nothing to do with rejecting you. Its all about their issues. This comforts me. But it does not remove the hurt and disappointment."
Wow Wallan, feel for you. Glad you have been able to create a thinking that helps you cope. That's the key imo. Unless someone comes out and says I don't care, we don't know really if they do or not based on their (in)actions. That could be there coping mechanism for them to keep their head above the water. Going through this since Tues with my bro. He's the only fam member that knows about my bc stuff. When it's good news, he'll respond with glad to hear, peace and love to you sis. Right now I'm facing losing my left perm implant today due to infection. I am absolutely crushed. I group text my friend Anna who is a help to me here and him from Tues when we found the tiny leak keeping them both updated. I've had meltdown texts. I didn't address him at all, just the group. I knew from 2011 when I was put in a psych ward and he disappeared from calling that it would have thrown him over the edge. He told me this when I was released. I was hurt for 10 days. He battles depression himself though he doesn't need meds, he just needs to be writing and in his own world where he can to cope.
Knowing this, I had a choice. Either still think that's no excuse, you should have called me at least once to see how I'm doing or to understand that it would have pushed him over the edge. What good would that have done? I sure don't want to see him struggle like I did. It was a horrible experience. So I choose to understand that that's the way he is, nothing wrong with that, we aren't all the same and that doesn't make him a bad or uncaring brother. I'm sure today if I text I'm off to sx he'll text back t's & p's. But if not, I know why because he told me. Even if he hadn't, it's not an uncommon thing for many people to cope with bad news of a loved one. Bottom line is it's your choice in how you interpret it. If it upsets you, just cut them out. This is no time with such a dx to have to deal with people who are negative or aren't a help. My fam doesn't know about my bc because after the psych ward experience, they all became Dr Phil's and I'm better now. Learned it that way. But I still love them and keep in touch. Some answer me some don't. They think my severe anxiety is back and so that's why I pushed away. Whatever. I can't fix them and I'm not expecting them to change. So I am where I am basically doing this all alone, living alone with my guinea pig, with 1 friend who will help me right after sx for a couple of days and a bro who periodically texts me well wishes.
I'm saying this because part of what led to my major meltdown was I was trying to figure out what's wrong with them and trying to get them to see the error in their views and to change them. Worked for a minute but then it's back to their thoughts again. It's important that we keep healthy thoughts no matter how mad/bad someone is to you. Cancer loves stress. Cut out the negative people and surround yourself with people who know and care. This board has been a Godsend to me as well. Here is the only place where I can expect people to get it because we are all in the same boat.
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Hi Artista:
Thanks for your kind words. It sounds like you too have been thru the ringer. I feel for you too. I was devastated by my familys lack of support years ago. It was worse than having BC. Now with the new dx, I half-heartedly hoped they would have learned and supported me this time. But nope. I wasn't so devastated. Just disappointed and a bit hurt. But nothing like last time. It is what it is.
After years of dealing with this beast, I have talked with tons of BC survivors and other cancer survivors who have had similar experiences with family and friends disappearing after their dx. I believe it is part of the journey now. I couldn't see myself disappearing if someone close to me was dx with cancer or another life threatening illness. But thats me. Having been thru cancer, I know how difficult it is and painful it is and hopefully I could offer some support and comfort to who needs it. But other people cannot cope unfortunately I have learned. They can't give what they don't have. Its just reality.
A friend of mine suggested I do not tell many people about my health to protect myself from any expectations I might have about them supporting me. Its wise words. I only tell people I know will offer compassion and support. That is why these boards are so invaluable. So, so invaluable.
I say, keep on keeping on
wallan
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The only reason I told my bro (who lives 400 miles away) is just in case of emergency, he knows where my advanced directive and such matters are----and he's not one to dispense advice like change your diet or you're obese, that's why you got it words. Stupid shit like that. Thankfully if he can't handle it he goes mia and when he does send me messages, it's of support and love and well wishes.
My mom is coming from Seattle to visit fam 30 min away on Sat. Haven't seen or spoken words with her since Dec 2014, my doing not hers. Anxiety issues. She's been here a couple times since, always saying I hope to see you. I respond with need to be left alone. She's a big know it all and would send me back to the psych ward with all her talk, and she talks a lot. Love her, but no. So sometimes it's better not to associate with those who do care like I know my mom cares and loves me, but for my sanity's sake, she and the rest of the fam and dad are out of the cancer loop.
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Good Morning Artista and Wallan. Thank you for sharing your stories with me. Big hugs to both of you. My heart and support goes out to you. It is so raw for me right now. You would have thought that my Aunt being a 10 year BC survivor would have felt the same way we feel: Pay it Forward. No one in our family, or in her circle, abandoned her. We all stood right there next to her, strong, supportive, encouraging.
Right now I am going through that anger phase (at least I hope it's a phase) where I want to hurt her as much as she is hurting me. I just want to yell and scream at her "I hate you, I hate you." I know I must work through this and quickly. I was there for her for her BC, never once shying away from it. I was there for her for her Type 2 Diabetes.
I wrote her a heartfelt note right after she did this to me. If I received a letter like that I would have picked up the phone immediately. Right now I want to write her a letter and point out everything to her and not soften the blow. I made the mistake of calling her yesterday, but when I heard her super happy chipper voice answer the phone I hung up. The anger I felt was so intense. It was "how can you be so happy when you have absolutely devastated me and taken away so much hope and joy from me."
Maybe writing that letter and putting my tears, anger, lost hope on paper will help to move forward. I know it won't change what has happened. It won't fix anything. It would, I hope, help to just get it out.
Next Thursday I have my second surgery. I can't go in there the mess I am today.
Sending all of you so much support, love, and hugs as we navigate through this journey.
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Hi yhendrix;
So sorry to hear of your grief and pain. Just know it is normal and expected. Of course you feel angry and hurt. Of course you do. It will pass though and you will come to accept this.
In my life, I have learned that we can give and give and give and support and that we expect those same people to be there for us when we need it. This is natural and good. But unfortunately, it doesn't always work out that as you are experiencing. I feel so much for you. I know what its like.
Hugs to you. When I was going thru that, I was extra loving to myself. Pampered myself with what I wanted to do only. And of course, I vented at these boards. And journalled alot. And went for long energetic walks. And listened to angry music and sad music and cried lots. I got through it. We all do. We all adapt and learn because that is what we are made to naturally do.
It just sucks as we grieve at the beginning. Hugs again to you.
What day is your surgery?
wallan
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- 3.1K Not Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastases but Concerned
- 189 Palliative Therapy/Hospice Care
- 488 Second or Third Breast Cancer
- 1.2K Stage I Breast Cancer
- 313 Stage II Breast Cancer
- 3.8K Stage III Breast Cancer
- 2.5K Triple-Negative Breast Cancer
- 13.1K Day-to-Day Matters
- 132 All things COVID-19 or coronavirus
- 87 BCO Free-Cycle: Give or Trade Items Related to Breast Cancer
- 5.9K Clinical Trials, Research News, Podcasts, and Study Results
- 86 Coping with Holidays, Special Days and Anniversaries
- 828 Employment, Insurance, and Other Financial Issues
- 101 Family and Family Planning Matters
- Family Issues for Those Who Have Breast Cancer
- 26 Furry friends
- 1.8K Humor and Games
- 1.6K Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts
- 706 Recipe Swap for Healthy Living
- 704 Recommend Your Resources
- 171 Sex & Relationship Matters
- 9 The Political Corner
- 874 Working on Your Fitness
- 4.5K Moving On & Finding Inspiration After Breast Cancer
- 394 Bonded by Breast Cancer
- 3.1K Life After Breast Cancer
- 806 Prayers and Spiritual Support
- 285 Who or What Inspires You?
- 28.7K Not Diagnosed But Concerned
- 1K Benign Breast Conditions
- 2.3K High Risk for Breast Cancer
- 18K Not Diagnosed But Worried
- 7.4K Waiting for Test Results
- 603 Site News and Announcements
- 560 Comments, Suggestions, Feature Requests
- 39 Mod Announcements, Breastcancer.org News, Blog Entries, Podcasts
- 4 Survey, Interview and Participant Requests: Need your Help!
- 61.9K Tests, Treatments & Side Effects
- 586 Alternative Medicine
- 255 Bone Health and Bone Loss
- 11.4K Breast Reconstruction
- 7.9K Chemotherapy - Before, During, and After
- 2.7K Complementary and Holistic Medicine and Treatment
- 775 Diagnosed and Waiting for Test Results
- 7.8K Hormonal Therapy - Before, During, and After
- 50 Immunotherapy - Before, During, and After
- 7.4K Just Diagnosed
- 1.4K Living Without Reconstruction After a Mastectomy
- 5.2K Lymphedema
- 3.6K Managing Side Effects of Breast Cancer and Its Treatment
- 591 Pain
- 3.9K Radiation Therapy - Before, During, and After
- 8.4K Surgery - Before, During, and After
- 109 Welcome to Breastcancer.org
- 98 Acknowledging and honoring our Community
- 11 Info & Resources for New Patients & Members From the Team