mom just diagnosed appt tmrw with oncologist questions

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iamtamiq
iamtamiq Member Posts: 5
edited March 2017 in Radiation Therapy - Before, During, and After

Hi

I wish I could take this breast cancer away from my mom.  She was diagnosed and had a biopsy last week.  We have first apt with oncologist tomorrow and I am scared.  I don't know the right questions to ask.  What if we fail her?  Good news is lymph nodes do NOT have any cancer.  I honestly don't know much   Mixed carcinoma with ductal and lobal features is all I know.



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  • ElaineTherese
    ElaineTherese Member Posts: 3,328
    edited March 2017

    Hi!

    I'm so sorry that this has happened to your Mom and to your family. ((Hugs))

    Things you'll want to know (though your doctors might not know until the tests results are in):

    1) How quickly is her cancer replicating? (What grade is it?)

    2) Is her cancer fed by estrogen? (Is it ER+/PR+? Or, ER+/PR-?)

    3) Does her cancer have an over-expression of the protein, HER2? (Is it HER2+?)

    4) What is the approximate size of her tumor? Is it one lump or more than one (multifocal)?

    The answers to these questions will help determine how her cancer will be treated. Most breast cancer patients have cancer which is ER+/PR+/HER2-. Such patients have surgery first and then have their cancer tested via the Oncotype test. The Oncotype test determines whether or not the benefits of chemo outweigh the risks. Many women can safely avoid chemo, based on the results of the Oncotype test.

    If your Mom's lump is small and is not multifocal, she probably has a choice between a mastectomy or lumpectomy, but if she chooses a lumpectomy, her doctors will recommend radiation.

    Best wishes to you and your Mom!


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  • melmcbee
    melmcbee Member Posts: 1,119
    edited March 2017

    Take a device to record appt. notebook and pen to take notes. Ask what type or kind of cancer it is. Ask for a list of what needs to be done. What breast surgeon and possible plastic surgeon is suggested. What scans or tests are needed next. Is there a breast cancer coordinator at that facility or local hospital to help organize these dictors and tests. What other doctor if any is needed. Medical oncologist versus radiation incologist or both. Doed she need medicine like xanax or anything right now. This is just a short suggestion list. Oh and breathe. You will get through thi

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  • iamtamiq
    iamtamiq Member Posts: 5
    edited March 2017

    printing your response out to take to DR.  I feel s unprepared but after tomorrows apt I'm sure we will have a thousand questions.  THANK YOU so much for responding so quickly. YOu both are amazing!!   I'm blessed to have found you both

    Tami

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  • iamtamiq
    iamtamiq Member Posts: 5
    edited March 2017

    I am blessed that you have responded so quickly.  It makes me feel a little more prepared.  I will take my phone to record conversation on until I get a tape recorder.  THANK you again.....I'm sorry this response is so scattered. 

    God Bless you


    Tami

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  • Midwest_Laura
    Midwest_Laura Member Posts: 168
    edited March 2017

    Hello, Tami.  As Melanie pointed out: deep breaths.  This is your first appointment, not your last.  Take a written list of questions.  Don't leave until they are all answered.  At the same time, don't worry that you won't think of everything during that appointment.  There will be plenty more in the near and distant future.  You will have time to get all of your questions asked and answered.  Many doctors and their supporting staff will respond to questions outside the official appointment.  Is there a way that you could e-mail questions that come up after the appointment? 

    You are such a wonderful woman to be a hands-on advocate for your mother.  I hope that you can come away from your initial conversation with a general idea for a plan of action.  That should help you to direct the anxiety towards something that keeps you moving forward.  Keep us posted on how things turn out.

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  • Wildplaces
    Wildplaces Member Posts: 864
    edited March 2017

    Hello Tami,

    Usually at a first appointment two things happen:

    - the cancer is described as per post above - you should get some information ( but on a biopsy - it will preliminary ) of the size and grade of the lesion

    - a treatment plan (? surgery, if need be other therapy, further blood work and scans) is proposed and the main benefits and side effects of that plan are discussed

    No treatment plan is set in stone.

    Trust your instincts on the way consult is going - they tend to be very strong and accurate in such circumstances.

    You and your family will have time to decide what is best for you.

    Wishing you well,

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  • iamtamiq
    iamtamiq Member Posts: 5
    edited March 2017

    Thank you Melanie.

    You are absolutely correct...many appointments. And breathing is hard. I cant imagine how mom is doing with all this. ((hugs))

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  • iamtamiq
    iamtamiq Member Posts: 5
    edited March 2017

    Wildplaces.....you have all been so kind. I'm sorry you're dealing with this as well. Thank you and God bless!


    Tami

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