5 years out -- how do you feel?
I am now 5 years and 3 months past treatment, nearly 6 years since diagnosis. I battled terrible fatigue for several years post-treatment. I wouldn't say that I'm fatigued now, but I feel like my baseline level of energy and focus is significantly lower than it was 6 years ago. I am self-employed, used to be a workaholic, but have never gotten back to working full-time. I'm starting to look for a "real" job, and most in my field are full time, but I honestly don't think I can work 8-hour days 5 days in a row without rapidly becoming exhausted.
I've heard it said that BC treatment ages you 10 years, and that feels about right to me. 59-year-olds are expected to be working full time. 69-year-olds are not.
Has anyone else found that they feel aged beyond their years from treatment?
For the record, I'm not depressed, thyroid is fine, good diet and exercise regimen, although I do have pernicious anemia (and get B12 shots as needed).
Comments
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Just reached 5 years recently. I was 55 at diagnosis and felt like I went to 90. Slowly it went back down to more like my real age.
I am self-employed and do work full-time, but I have to pace myself. I'm grateful I work from home so I can take breaks. Still, I find myself going to bed 2 hours before sleep time to just lay and watch television. I get fatigued by 8:30 pm - never used to as always was a night person staying up until 1 am before BC. I do not have the energy for outside activities like I once did like gardening and yard work. My gardens have become smaller.
But all things considered, I've learned not to compare this reality to my old reality. It took a long time to get to that point. I don't get so mad at lymphedema and one breast gone. I've learned to wear high cut tops and finally got rid of all the old ones. Just last week I got rid of everything in my closet that reminded me of breast cancer!
Occasionally, I still have chemo flashbacks, but they are less than they were. I still have what I call "cancer of the week" fears about some mets or new cancer, but I don't get so crazy. I've learned to live with the fears like an unwanted guest that never leaves.
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Five years out as well. I generally can do about four - five hours at the farm, then I'm done. I can barely move out of the chair the rest of the night. In my twenties, thirties,and forties I'd work all day and then come home and work all evening. No more. I just don't care about housework or yard work anymore. For everything there is a season, I guess. I probably should not have been such a workaholic all those years anyway.
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I am actually 14 years out and still feel some of what you talk about. I felt 10 years aged since the treatment and always felt so discouraged about that. I went through a divorce within 14 months of diagonisis and had to start a full time job (after being a stay at home mom) to care for my family. I worked for 7 years and it sucked the life out of me. Those years were very diffucult. I did remarry and eventually had to quit before the stress and exhaustion killed me. The last couple of years I have found new energy with a new direction I've taken in my life with personal development, thought management, etc..
This has been a great blessing to me and raised my energy and finally seeing a bright new future for myself.
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Beautyineachday-
Thank you for sharing your perspective with us! And congrats on 14 years, we wish you many more years of health and happiness!
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