Astounding Things People Say or Write
Options
CalGal
Member Posts: 469
It's that season ... with holiday cards and get-togethers and well-meaning friends and acquaintances ... with foot in mouth or hand ...
What about sharing some of the astounding cancer-related things that are said or written to us?
Today, my husband and I received our first Christmas card. (It's not even December ... geez!) There was a nice written note inside ... that not only mentions that I'm in their prayers, but that two other friends were dx'd with cancer (glioblastoma) and that one died! There was also a copy of an obituary for Miriam Engleberg, known for her book "Cancer Made Me a Shallower Person: A Memoir in Comics" who passed from bc!
Nothing like spreading holiday cheer ... Actually, I got a hearty laugh from the irony of it all!
CalGal
What about sharing some of the astounding cancer-related things that are said or written to us?
Today, my husband and I received our first Christmas card. (It's not even December ... geez!) There was a nice written note inside ... that not only mentions that I'm in their prayers, but that two other friends were dx'd with cancer (glioblastoma) and that one died! There was also a copy of an obituary for Miriam Engleberg, known for her book "Cancer Made Me a Shallower Person: A Memoir in Comics" who passed from bc!
Nothing like spreading holiday cheer ... Actually, I got a hearty laugh from the irony of it all!
CalGal
Comments
-
dear cal gal i went to a jewelry party three weeks ago and even before i got half way down the table the cookie lee rep was showing me bc braclets and watches.ofcouse i felt weird but my sister covered for me and said "she really only wears gold instead of silver." any way our mother already bought her enough pink stuff.
-
That's awful! You really wonder about some people.
It's kind of like those women who told all kinds of horror stories to pregnant women at their baby showers.
Catherine -
one guy where i work, upon my telling him i had a double mastectomy, said,"well, they were small, so you probably won't miss them much anyway." and he was a friend of mine....OMG! just to ignorant to respond to..
-
My sister-in-law has invited us to their "neighborhood Xmas party" to meet the neighbor who is newly diagnosed with breast cancer. This neighbor of theirs had a lumpectomy, and is now having rads, and my sil is just sure that my own experience (started in 12/05 -lumpectomy, ibc, chemo, mastectomy and rads) will "cheer this lady up". If I go, I hope to provide a safe harbor from my sil :-) oh dear...
-
The jewelry rep was bad ... anything for sales (?!), the co-worker was astoundingly offensive, and now a SIL ... who wants you to cheer up the neighbor?!
You'd think tne SIL would want you to feel better ... and a n'hood Christmas party isn't exactly the time for you to do that ... even if you wanted to ... I'm guessing that your SIL is a lot of work and a piece of work!
Yesterday, I finished my Christmas shopping ... and I found it astounding that of all my credit card purchases the last few weeks, it was only the last two sales clerks who commented on the difference between my ID (from only 2.5 years ago) and my appearance ... I replied "cancer and chemo really suck" ... which was met by a stunned silence from one (a woman probably 21) and empathy from the other (a guy around 38-40), who mentioned that his sister had been struggling with cancer.
I have to say I find it scary that more people haven't commented on that, just in terms of identity theft ... But, the comments combined with those awful dressing rooms was a downer and made me feel bad about my appearance/self-image in comparison to how I looked even 10 months ago (before hair loss and chemo weight gain/bloating) ... -
I had a detached retina five years ago and had to wear an eye patch for a week. It was amazing that no one made any comment during my weekly grocery visit. I've gone to that same store for over 25 years and all the clerks know me. I was surprised that no one asked about my eye, but maybe they didn't know what to say. Oh well...
Catherine
Categories
- All Categories
- 679 Advocacy and Fund-Raising
- 289 Advocacy
- 68 I've Donated to Breastcancer.org in honor of....
- Test
- 322 Walks, Runs and Fundraising Events for Breastcancer.org
- 5.6K Community Connections
- 282 Middle Age 40-60(ish) Years Old With Breast Cancer
- 53 Australians and New Zealanders Affected by Breast Cancer
- 208 Black Women or Men With Breast Cancer
- 684 Canadians Affected by Breast Cancer
- 1.5K Caring for Someone with Breast cancer
- 455 Caring for Someone with Stage IV or Mets
- 260 High Risk of Recurrence or Second Breast Cancer
- 22 International, Non-English Speakers With Breast Cancer
- 16 Latinas/Hispanics With Breast Cancer
- 189 LGBTQA+ With Breast Cancer
- 152 May Their Memory Live On
- 85 Member Matchup & Virtual Support Meetups
- 375 Members by Location
- 291 Older Than 60 Years Old With Breast Cancer
- 177 Singles With Breast Cancer
- 869 Young With Breast Cancer
- 50.4K Connecting With Others Who Have a Similar Diagnosis
- 204 Breast Cancer with Another Diagnosis or Comorbidity
- 4K DCIS (Ductal Carcinoma In Situ)
- 79 DCIS plus HER2-positive Microinvasion
- 529 Genetic Testing
- 2.2K HER2+ (Positive) Breast Cancer
- 1.5K IBC (Inflammatory Breast Cancer)
- 3.4K IDC (Invasive Ductal Carcinoma)
- 1.5K ILC (Invasive Lobular Carcinoma)
- 999 Just Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastasis
- 652 LCIS (Lobular Carcinoma In Situ)
- 193 Less Common Types of Breast Cancer
- 252 Male Breast Cancer
- 86 Mixed Type Breast Cancer
- 3.1K Not Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastases but Concerned
- 189 Palliative Therapy/Hospice Care
- 488 Second or Third Breast Cancer
- 1.2K Stage I Breast Cancer
- 313 Stage II Breast Cancer
- 3.8K Stage III Breast Cancer
- 2.5K Triple-Negative Breast Cancer
- 13.1K Day-to-Day Matters
- 132 All things COVID-19 or coronavirus
- 87 BCO Free-Cycle: Give or Trade Items Related to Breast Cancer
- 5.9K Clinical Trials, Research News, Podcasts, and Study Results
- 86 Coping with Holidays, Special Days and Anniversaries
- 828 Employment, Insurance, and Other Financial Issues
- 101 Family and Family Planning Matters
- Family Issues for Those Who Have Breast Cancer
- 26 Furry friends
- 1.8K Humor and Games
- 1.6K Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts
- 706 Recipe Swap for Healthy Living
- 704 Recommend Your Resources
- 171 Sex & Relationship Matters
- 9 The Political Corner
- 874 Working on Your Fitness
- 4.5K Moving On & Finding Inspiration After Breast Cancer
- 394 Bonded by Breast Cancer
- 3.1K Life After Breast Cancer
- 806 Prayers and Spiritual Support
- 285 Who or What Inspires You?
- 28.7K Not Diagnosed But Concerned
- 1K Benign Breast Conditions
- 2.3K High Risk for Breast Cancer
- 18K Not Diagnosed But Worried
- 7.4K Waiting for Test Results
- 603 Site News and Announcements
- 560 Comments, Suggestions, Feature Requests
- 39 Mod Announcements, Breastcancer.org News, Blog Entries, Podcasts
- 4 Survey, Interview and Participant Requests: Need your Help!
- 61.9K Tests, Treatments & Side Effects
- 586 Alternative Medicine
- 255 Bone Health and Bone Loss
- 11.4K Breast Reconstruction
- 7.9K Chemotherapy - Before, During, and After
- 2.7K Complementary and Holistic Medicine and Treatment
- 775 Diagnosed and Waiting for Test Results
- 7.8K Hormonal Therapy - Before, During, and After
- 50 Immunotherapy - Before, During, and After
- 7.4K Just Diagnosed
- 1.4K Living Without Reconstruction After a Mastectomy
- 5.2K Lymphedema
- 3.6K Managing Side Effects of Breast Cancer and Its Treatment
- 591 Pain
- 3.9K Radiation Therapy - Before, During, and After
- 8.4K Surgery - Before, During, and After
- 109 Welcome to Breastcancer.org
- 98 Acknowledging and honoring our Community
- 11 Info & Resources for New Patients & Members From the Team