Is anyone else an atheist with BC besides me?

my daughter-in-law was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer 2 1/2 years ago. Her spiritual journey is quite confusing. She holds onto her belief in witchcraft & other such related stuff and Mormon ism at the same time.. Recently, she has given up her other beliefs and has become extremely devout mormon. My son is an atheist. She has been in denial of her cancer for almost 2 years and even after being hospitalized and told by 3 different doctors she had less than a month to live, she refused all treatment until finally she accepted a type of hormonal treatment. She started to improve and convinced my son to.believe she was on the way to complete recovery even though the cancer had spread through her whole body. It was when the pain in her spine was beyond relief and she had gone blind due to cancer in her brain she finally said she thinks she's going to die and she started hospice. Meanwhile, her belief in Mormon ism is greatly intensified and she started taking some kind of herbal treatment. That was about 3 months ago. But again she started to recover and was even able to go on a 4 day vacation trip. My son said she was doing great. Yesterday, I came home and found my son overwhelmed with tears because she had gone for an mri and some tests and reports that the cancer is completely gone from most of her body except her spine. There is still a little in her brain but it too is shrinking. She has since the beginning wanted to tell the world she is so special that God performed a miracle and healed her. Now it seems like maybe it's true. My son has been taken on such a Rollercoaster ride for 2 1/2 years. I don't know how much more he can take. He believes she is healed and he asked me if it's possible there really is a God. I'm agnostic and all I could say was maybe. The thing that really makes me angry is I'm a pseudo-scientist and I do not believe she is going to be miraculously healed. She has repeatedly given everyone false hope and I can't stand to see my son suffer so. But when it's all said and done and she is healed without the aid of modern medicine, maybe this will bring us all to God and the promise of eternal life.

I hope your daughter in law continues to recover.  I don't have belief in any gods but I don't think we know all the answers when it comes to the workings of the mind on the body.  Some spontaneous healing of cancer has been linked to exposure to virus and bacterial infection.  The link appears to be so strong that there is now experimentation with virus and bacteria being introduced into patients with untreatable cancer.

No one really understands the placebo effect which was first identified by nurses during the Crimea War.  Nurses were running out of morphine and started diluting it.  The reduction of pain stayed the same regardless of the dilution until some wounded soldiers had elimination of pain with the injection of saline alone.  It appears that there is something going on with your DIL whether it is the placebo effect or the effects of infection.  If it was a god, then why doesn't this god provide relief for all good Mormon women or for that matter all faithful who pray for relief of suffering?

Epicurus asked this question about evil (cancer is certainly evil) almost 2000 years ago. 

1. Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent.
2. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent.
3. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil?
4. Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?
   

Happy Birthday, Wren.

Hug

Welcome, KB870.  Is 870 your area code?  We might be neighbors. 

I have a friend from high school who occasionally contacts me via email.  We live in different states.  It really bothers her that I'm and atheist.  Just my impression, but I think it's because my unbelief threatens her belief in some way.  I tell her I don't want to discuss religion and she stops for a while. Then every email we exchange has just a touch more god comments until I tell her to stop.  Then the cycle begins again.  I don't want to stop emailing her because I think she is very lonely. 

I am not "out" in my local community because I fear backlash.  I live in a town where most of the population think one can't be a good person and be an atheist.  It's just not worth the hasle. 

Wren, I'd give my eye teeth to live in WA right now instead of TX. It's so horrid here right now. Be glad you escaped when you did and that Canada isn't too far if you have to escape. I've basically had to excuse myself from every family event for the rest of my life since they are not only overly religious, but honestly think trump is a decent human. how they can equate those 2 is beyond comprehension.

My heart is completely broken by their ignorance, and sometimes outright bigotry. Trying to heal from stage2 of my recon that has not turned out well. And a person who is a big part of my social circle- only 44, has been diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer with mets.

I just want to run away. Which makes me feel selfish. having a hard time putting my big girl pants on over this damn compression/torture device.

i'd def be happier drunk than sober at this point.

but i know that at the end of the day, i am glad i woke up early in life.

anyhow- welcome KB870- hope you can find some camaraderie here. I don't think this group is usually this morose- i'm harshing everyone's mellow right now. I promise not to do it for too long.

xoxo

I'm in SoCal too and don't think I could bear to be in a more religious and maybe intolerant community. As it is religion is definitely more spoken about here than in the U.K. I did some voluntary work at a very Christian charity. I was upfront when I joined and always if asked,. E.g. "What Church do you go to?","I don't", "Would you like to come to xxx Church", "No Thank you" , Sometimes this was a bit awkward, but I always remained respectful. I would join in prayers at meetings and before meals if we went out. I was truthful because I feel it's the right thing to do not because I have to because my religion tells me to.

Another impact of the openness of religion in the US for my DH and I on moving to SoCal in 2010. Our sons were all older (12 & 14) so we didn't meet people through school so much. We began to realise many people have their church as their center of their social like. My younger son, now a senior at HS, played rugby and we have become very close to our friends in the club. Rugby by tradition is very social, and we feed the kids of both teams after games. My DH says rugby is our religion, and we plan to continue to be involved after our son leaves for college next year.

Have had people put me a n their prayer lists, and say they will pray for me. I don't mind, as long as they don't mind me not oining in.

Each to their own - that's my motto!

Jwoo, living in Texas with a bunch of Trumpty Dumpty supporters is my definition of a living hell...

I respect all faiths and my DD is an aetheist. I do believe myself, but I refuse to try and cram it down people's throats. You don't choose it, it chooses you.

Live and let live, I always say.

Lita

I was worried one of my 3 sons would be married in a church , but I was lucky . My middle son was married at a winery . That was the best way . I will go into a church if I have to . My mother needed me at my father's funeral . But I hate the feeling that I am forced to listen to the sermon I want to stand up and scream . But , of course , I don't . Both my husband and I are amazed that the church doesn't fall down if we walk in . Even the cathedrals of Europe when we lived in Madrid .

I'm Jewish and believe in a creator / organizing force / something way too complex for me to wrap my mind around..., but have little, if any, dogma, so I often have more in common with non-theists. I most certainly do NOT believe in a supernatural magical sugar daddy who capriciously answers prayers as if they were popularity contests. "Oh, sorry, but only 11 people prayed for your healing. Doesn't cut it. Bye Felicia! Next!"

I live in Texas, so we are constantly beaten over the head with poor old exhausted Jesus night and day. I saw online someone we know- but assiduously avoid in real life- asking for prayers because he fell off of a ladder while he was cleaning the gutters and lost his glasses. (He wasn't hurt).The next day he breathlessly reported that after an exhaustive search of the bushes in his yard, his glasses had been recovered, THANKS TO EVERYONE'S PRAYERS! Cos, y'know, if people hadn't prayed, those glasses would have stayed lost forever and ever amen.

Oy.

DH and DS are athiests. DD and her husband are Buddhist and raised their children in that tradition. DIL was raised Episcopalian and they were married by an Episcopal priest in a garden. One Christmas we all had to attend Xmas Eve services at the Episcopal church because DS was interviewed in the newspaper and said it was his family tradition. I think he had been to 1 or 2 Xmas Eve services while he was in high school. The priest had all the kids come up front and sit by her while she read the traditional story. So here we sit in the pew and the 20yo Buddhist keeps muttering he'll be struck dead by God any minute. I think he was half sincere. We told DS to keep his mouth shut next year.

Humanism is a philosophical and ethical stance that emphasizes the value and agency of human beings, individually and collectively, and affirms their ability to improve their lives through the use of reason and ingenuity as opposed to submitting blindly to tradition and authority or sinking into cruelty and brutality.

Wikipedia

I'm for the kind of faith that supports community, without hurting, judging, or shaming its members or its dissenters. I've been considering the local Unitarian church, because it emphasizes compassion and tolerance.

This is a WONDERFUL thread!!!

Dizzybee: I agree with how people have always created supernatural beings to help them get thru the visicitudes of life...Huitzilopochtle and Quetzalcuatl (sp?) for the Latin American cultures; Pele, fire/volcano/lightning goddess for the Polynesian cultures; Thor, Odin and Loki for the Scandinavian cultures; and Zeus, Hera, Aphrodite, Apollo, etc. for the Mediterranean peoples.

SoCalLisa: Yep, the Catholic Church is the "parent" of social control...you can't get divorced and remarried without a special annulment or face excommunication; you can't get an abortion (or even use birth control - GEEZ!!); and you can't be a minister/pastor unless you have a dangling appendage between your legs; you can't take communion unless you're in a state of grace.....it goes on and on. No wonder my dad walked away from Catholicism. My four brothers and I were not raised in an organized religion. My parents believed in a higher power but never, not even once, dragged us to church. If we wanted to go, we had to go with our friends' families.

Fortunately, I live in CA, and everyone's pretty cool about others' spiritual beliefs. My next door neighbors on either side of me are Hindu, and they still have their Diwali celebration lights up. We have lots of Muslims in our community, too. I don't know what I'd do if I lived in one of those "reactionary" Evangelical Bible-Belt communities in the Deep South or Midwest. I am a follower of Christ, but it DEEPLY offends me when "religious" people drag Him into everything, especially politics. BTW: God doesn't care which football team wins the big game! He has lots of other things to deal with.

Sadly, we've had two incidents of men assaulting women wearing hijabs on college campuses, and another man broke in to some woman's car and wrote her a nasty note full of expletives, calling her a "hijab-wearing #itch...we own America now, get the &uc* out!" It makes me sick! The lack of respect and ignorance never ceases to amaze me.

Sigh...I'm afraid we'll be seeing way more of this intolerance now that Trumpty Dumpty is in power.

This actually happened in my neck of the woods, Ananda.

Lita

Nine Twelve, We took our kids to the Unitarian church because they were getting the other stuff from baby sitters and at school. The early service was totally open to any belief, the late service was more traditional. The theme was to decide for yourself what made sense.

I wonder about people who are so insecure they find it necessary to attack someone with a different belief. Do they attack other people too? For the fun of it?