Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

Welcome to the newbies. I've was diagnosed 3 years ago when I was 62, had a lumpectomy, then had chemo because my oncotype score indicated my cancer was aggressive even though it was small and my lymph nodes were clean, and then radiation.

My overall thoughts and suggestions: Don't read every article on the internet you find about breast cancer, you'll just get confused about all the conflicting and scary stuff out there, you'll find everything you need here on this site - up to date and accurate informational articles, and a great variety of forums. Join the forums that apply to where you're at in your journey and mark them as favorites so you can find them again. Don't look too far ahead and try to solve all the "what if's" - it's a waste of time and energy. Deal with what you have control over right now, mobilizing your support system, preparing your questions for your health team. Go to your appointments with your questions written down, and start a folder to keep track of everything.

Ask each of your doctors if it's OK that you record your appointments with your smart phone/iPod. They cover so much info it's hard to take it all in, and even having a second person with you isn't always the answer. Lew wasn't very good at taking notes and often neither one of us good remember everything that we'd been told. It was several months between my first visit with the radiologist and when I finally started radiation, and it was so helpful to go back and relisten to that first session.

It will get easier as you learn about more about what you're dealing with and a definite plan is developed, Ask for copies of your pathology reports after your biopsy and surgery, You have a right to them, and it will help you research your options, and it'll help us answer your questions. Knowing your stage and grade, and whether your tumor is hormone dependent, is very useful.

One step at a time, take a deep breath, and don't be reading about chemo if you don't even have your biopsy results yet. You may not even need it.

So tomorrow I go to oncologist. What information can I expect from him? Will he tell my type, etc. I have only had biopsy following the ultrasound. So not sure just what he is going to tell me. After that I will call surgeon and make that appointment. You ladies are such a great comfort knowing that others have been in our shoes.

Jackie, When I read back today, I found your quote about words...it is so true. Words are just our "models" of real life ideas, feelings, and actions. There is so much going on behind our words!

Ritajean, I am on the edge of my seat watching this Cubs game. It must be tough to watch them fall so far behind. I am glad you got to go to the game. I have been to a few World Series games in NY. Safe travels!
ChiSandy, I am a Yankee fan rooting for the Cubs. They earned it and I want them to make history! Enjoy the pulse in the city. My son lives there and he texts me now and then to describe the vibe.

Carole, I am glad to hear you are playing golf at home again. It sounds like your mother is doing well at her residence. Do you have a change in the weather in fall? I just pushed my thermostat up for the first time this year. It is in the 40s outside.

Goincrzy8, I am glad you found BCO and this thread. This experience with other women who face surgery meant so much to me when I was diagnosed. There should be a thread for women like you who are being diagnosed this fall and who have surgeries scheduled. But stay here too!

Meeting with your MO can be informative. The things that you hear may not be easy, as no one wants to go through surgery and treatment.

Things you can ask would include a complete explanation of your initial biopsy result. Your cancer should have been graded and typed which gives the MO information regarding possible treatments. You can ask for a copy of your biopsy report. Any words, acronyms, or numbers you do not understand can be looked up on informative sites such as this.
Note that your stage of BC is usually determined after surgery when the entire tumor is analyzed. There could be a few changes after the surgical biopsy.
You can ask about treatment options at the medical facility you choose.
You can ask about testing such as the Oncotype score which is a recurrence score for early stage cancers. The score is also useful for guiding treatment decisions.

Most MO offices have written material for patients to take home to read.
I wish you a good appointment that answers your questions.

Anne and Jean, it is so great to see your photo of your meet-up. You are both special ladies, and even better together, I'm sure.

Heading off to get sleep and face a long work day tomorrow.

Joan

Well today I find out all the future stuff. I thought I would be fine but find myself in that crying stage. I guess the fear of the unknown. I only have the appointment with MO first because they called me right away. The BS called a couple days later, and I asked her who I should see first. She said see MO first and bring records to us after your appointment. I just am tired of the limbo land. Again, I have no choice but to sit an wait. All things happen when they are supposed to.

"Let us be grateful to people who make us happy: they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom."

– Marcel Proust

So for some reason I feel 100% better today. Oncologist is a young female, I liked her . I have the most common breast cancer IDC after breast exam she feels that I would probably benefit from a lumpectomy with radiation, which is what I have been praying for. But we will see what the surgeon has to say. She did say I would need hormone therapy I do have the pathology but it doesnt make sense to me, so I will wait till the lab post it on my account so I can see the full report. Here in CA it takes 14 days after the physician see its.. She wouldnt let my daughterin law tape the conversation so from the notes she took, I am relaying the converstion....GOSH just knowing is so much better.

thank you ladies for being here.

(((Sandra & Mike))). When it rains, it pours. Prayers that he makes a full recovery.

Praying things will start to look up for you both, That God will give you strength to deal with this last hurdle. Jean

Goincrzy8, I'm really surprised your MO wouldn't let you tape the appointment, she's the first one I've heard that's refused. Don't give up on asking your surgeon, explain that they cover so much information so fast, and when you're under stress it's hard to get it all the first time and you just want to review it again when you get home. It's not like you're preparing to sue her.

Sandra, I'm so very sorry, that's the same thing that happened to Lew and I remember that growing pool of blood vividly. The nose is so vascular that falling on your face causes lots of bleeding. Did they do surgery to remove the hematoma or wasn't that an option for him? My prayers are with you both.

Sandra, I'm so sorry to hear this but hope is a fantastic thing. It is always there waiting for us ( once we have regained some of our own senses ) to pick it up. The Dr. I work for had a TMI ( fell off a ladder 12 feet down ), so while it may look horrendous the outcome can be okay. Just that you have had such a plateful that it really does seem majorly un-fair for the burdens to increase again. Lots of hopes and prayers and positive healing energies.

Goincrzy -- glad you are now on this side of your appt. It does make a difference when information starts coming in and you can begin to feel like you are not stumbling around in a fog completely adrift and totally un-prepared. Each step gets you closer and closer. As far as the hormone therapy I not completely sure either --- too long ago since my dx. I guess. Right at his moment I would say I think she may be talking about a 5 yr. pill therapy that a majority of us do.

It is a pill that basically cuts off any errant cancer cell at the pass. In other words, it just can't develop and dies. We have lumpectomies, and then radiation, and then sometime after that start the pills. The way it was described to me long ago is that it was like insurance. You want to take every possible avenue to make sure that what you have done so far is covered as much as can be and the pill ( should some cell have been missed ) will likely be the thing that would take care of that. I didn't think twice --- wanted anything and everything that would get cancer out of my life and so I took Anastrozole ( that is generic Arimidex ) for 5 yrs.

Glad you are headed in the right direction.

hi ladies, although I haven't posted in a while I read This thread often. I'm scheduled for my YEar follow up scans and am very nervous How did you get through this time? I don't drink and don't know how to stop worrying Thanks for your help

Nanagirl, it's normal to stress about checkups. In the meantime, hugs of reassurance.

Goingcrzy, the 5 years of arimidex or another Aromatase Inhibitor (AI) seem to be standard protocol for post menopausal bc patients. I did my 5 years and didn't have any major side effects. I blamed a lot of things like weight gain and higher cholesterol on the arimidex but these conditions didn't go away when I stopped taking the little white pill. Darn it!!

Sandra, what a horrible accident to occur when neither Mike nor you were prepared for it to happen. And certainly didn't need for it to happen. Puffin, I can just imagine what awful memories were stirred up for you. I'm hoping for the best.

I went to a urologist with my mother on Tues. She talked with the dr., had him look at some lab work and then had a CT at a diagnostic place. The next morning the dr. called my sister and explained that my mother has a large kidney stone. My sister and my mother were meeting with the dr. this morning to discuss what can be done. No surgery at my mother's age. I'm waiting to hear the outcome of the appointment.

Meanwhile I have an appointment with a nephrologist, but the first new patient opening was Dec. 27th. Obviously my situation must not be critical! My kidney function numbers have been declining and I wanted to see a specialist.

Our wonderful fall coolness has gone away to be replaced by heat and higher humidity. This is turning out to be a very warm October. I had to close the windows and doors and turn on the a/c. We're in a drought and badly need rain. Feast or famine with old Mother Nature. Too much rain or not enough.

Happy Thursday.

Hi Goincrazy8, welcome to the site that will help you so much through this journey! I sent you a private message, and hope you get lots of answers from your drs today.

Puffin, I hesitated to even post yesterday because I knew it would conjure up some bad memories for you. The neurosurgeons are satisfied that the bleed stopped, but last weekend they were doing CT scans every few hours and prepared to have to make a decision. His platelets were so low, his body would not have been able to withstand an operation without bleeding to death.

The brain is an amazing thing. Mike has gone from incoherent rambling to lucid conversation in 6 days. He still cannot comprehend written words very well but his bouts of constant aphasia are only once every few hours now. Short term memory comes and goes.

Since he desperately wanted to be at home, Mike was released last evening. I anticipated a quiet night but instead had a walking nightmare. Mike's brain injury caused constant motion with his hands, trembling, constant rambling, combativeness at times, and attempts to stand up. (Which I can't let him do because he's too frail and will fall again.) We had to go back to the outpatient clinic this morning and I had to dress him and somehow get him to the car. I saw the doctor and started to cry that I had failed and couldn't keep him safe after all. Although Mike was so against a rehab facility, I had no choice but to have him sent there this afternoon. He isn't speaking to me but I can live with that rather than know he hurt himself on "my watch."

Further treatment for leukemia is on hold while he gets stronger. I should be sleeping since I got none last night, but I'm wracked with guilt. Mike slumped in his chair, hung his head, and said, "I give up." He's depressed and sad that he's back in another hospital. Poor guy.

Sandra, My heart cries for you. What an awful position to be in. I think safety first is the best decision. Then you can work on the rest of it. I don't blame him for feeling discouraged. No one ever wanted to be in a hospital. Hugs for both of you.