My Husband Scheduled for Mammogram and Ultrasound

cherylgrrl · October 2016

I'm scared to death.

My 61 year-old husband found a lump in his breast sometime between his last regular doctor checkup and now (6 months). He told his doctor about it, the doctor agreed there was a lump, and now he is scheduled for a mammogram and ultrasound. My husband is treating this in his usual, stoic way. I'm scared to death, because I've now researched MBC and found that because of his age and because he had a testicle removed in childhood he has two of the important risk factors. I've also read that lumps in mens' breasts are almost never benign but haven't been able to confirm this from other sources.

He has almost a week before these tests are done. Then I expect he will have a biopsy, and if it is MBC a mastectomy.

I don't know if he's researched this the way I have, but he shows no signs of wanting to talk about it. He did say last night that he didn't want to have surgery, and I told him that I would take good care of him if that happened.

The one thing that makes me hopeful is that I read the average time between discovering a symptom and reaching a diagnosis is 19 months for men.

I'd like to ask whether other forum participants would recommend that I talk to my husband now about my worries, or wait until we're further into this process and (God forbid) there is some real medical evidence that we should be concerned. I'd also like to ask what the recovery process is from a male mastectomy and what to expect. It's the unknown that is most frightening.

Moderators · October 2016

Hi Cherylgrrl-

We're so sorry for the worry and fear you're experiencing. We know how scary it can be, when so much is unknown and you don't have any real answers yet. It's good that his doctor was proactive in scheduling the mammogram and ultrasound; we know it's difficult, but try to take these steps one at a time. If you feel your husband would be receptive to hearing your concerns, we would encourage you to talk to him about them. If you need to find support for yourself (and him), this is a good place for it.

Regarding the surgical recovery, recovery times vary with each person. Should he have to undergo a mastectomy, he should expect to feel some pain and soreness at the surgical site for up to a few weeks. You can read more about the surgery here: http://www.breastcancer.org/symptoms/types/male_bc....

We hope his tests reveal that this is nothing to worry about, but regardless of the outcome, we're here for you both! Please keep us posted.

The Mods

cherylgrrl · October 2016

Just have to get through this weekend and then my husband will have his mammogram and ultrasound. On my birthday. What crappy timing is that? Only date he could get.

I know we won't have a definitive answer after these tests and the next step will be a biopsy. Why don't they just do a biopsy of the obvious lump?

Trying to think what can be done now to be better prepared to take action if the news isn't good. First thing I think about is, we don't live in a large metropolitan area. Far from it. If it comes to that, I don't think it would be optimal to have my husband treated here. How can I start the research about where to go? We could most easily go to the San Francisco Bay Area, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, or Phoenix from where we live. We can upgrade our insurance during open season and be ready to see anyone with some level of coverage starting Jan. 1 2017. But if he gets a diagnosis in say late October would it be foolish to wait for Jan. 1 to see a top professional? Or better to have surgery/treatment ASAP and get second opinion after Jan. 1.

Any guidance would be greatly appreciated.

ShetlandPony · October 2016

Hi, Cheryl. I am like you in wanting to make plans for whatever might happen because it makes me feel more comfortable. My husband is of the "cross that bridge when you come to it" mindset. I guess we complement each other. So, keeping in mind that you do not even know for sure if there is a problem, here are some things to consider. First, get a diagnosis. Second, get a treatment plan. Third, discuss the timing of treatment with the doctors. I agree that since male bc is rare, he should be seen at a major cancer center if possible. If not, try for a university-based hospital. I also recommend seeking a good cancer center the sooner in the process, the better, because even the diagnostics will be done well and the treatment planning is important. It may be possible to go for a consultation and plan, even if you can't start treatment there.

The NCCN Member Institutions are:

Second, there is nothing wrong with your getting support, like you are doing here, even if your husband wants to wait and see. Ask at the hospitals near you if there are any groups for you, and also call the American Cancer Society. Do something relaxing and distracting this weekend if you can.

P.S. I know you mean "Male Breast Cancer", but be aware that MBC is also the abbreviation for "Metastatic Breast Cancer".

cherylgrrl · October 2016

Thank you Shetland Pony so much for your reply and the listing of cancer treatment centers. It gives me something to think about as we have friends or relatives who we could potentially stay with during treatment. I know I'm jumping the gun, but thinking about next steps is helping with the anxiety.

cherylgrrl · October 2016

I just got the best birthday present ever. My husband and I went in for his mammogram and ultrasound tests this morning. Diagnosis was gynecomastia! Benign! Halleluah!

Very impressed with this small-town medical facility. They had us lined up for both tests on the day the radiologist was on premises. When we checked in, the person we initially talked to said we would have the ability to talk to the radiologist and would know if we would need to proceed with a biopsy. If necessary, the biopsy appointment would be set up before we left. The whole process was wonderful... and I was preparing for the worst, having to fight for a quick biopsy, etc.

So happy! But also so happy for the support I received here. Not so happy for the wonderful people who didn't get such good news. Male breast cancer is certainly an under-recognized disease, and everyone here who is struggling with it has my hopes and prayers...

Thank you so much.

Traveltext · October 2016

Good news cherlgrrl. If you ever have further concerns, you know there's a helpful community here. MaleBC is rare, but 2600 guys get it each year in the US alone.

The one piece of advice that stuck with me as a guy going through bc treatment was from my oncologist. She said: best not to have preconceived notions about any aspect of your treatment. In your case, best not to start worrying until the test results are in!

ShetlandPony · October 2016

Very good news, Cheryl! Thank you for coming back to tell us.

cherylgrrl · October 2016

Sadly, I found out later in the day that a good friend received his stage II prostate cancer diagnosis. It manages to touch us all, doesn't it?

Traveltext · October 2016

I've just had treatment for stage II prostate cancer and I can tell you that this disease is easier to treat than breast cancer. For men, there's a connection between bc and pc in the way that there is a connection in women between bc and ovarian cancer.

My Husband Scheduled for Mammogram and Ultrasound

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