Bilateral mastectomy at 56, no implants, but...
I chose a bilateral during my 2nd diagnosis for BC. I thought it would stop the cancer from returning. I was wrong. Anyway, I would go without a bra, but the scar is so clearly shown under a t-shirt and a bathing suit, that I won't do it. I also noticed if I don't wear my prosthetics, I tend to hunch. I had big honkers, and the weight was forcing me to stand straight. I hate bras. They all hit right on my scar. I just struggle wearing them, and haven't the courage to go without. I don't go out without my wig, or painting on my eyebrows (3rd BC now at 63), because people really stare, and I think they pity me, and/or are afraid of me, like it's catchy.
Comments
-
I felt the same way, katsie. I'm 9 months PFC now, so my hair, eyebrows, and eyelashes have come back in--my hair is about 2"long and very curly. But when I had no hair and eyebrows I was very sensitive about it. I never went without a wig outside the house and I never went without a beanie inside the house, never, ever, ever.
I opted for no recon, which turned out to be a wise decision because I lost a LOT of tissue to necrosis--I would have lost to whole business. I could not tolerate a bra of any kind until about 7 months post-BMX, due to the massive scaring. I just last week got prostheses and I'm pretty happy with them. I had them fitted professionally and the bras I chose are very soft, even the band is soft.
Anyway, I have not been happy with the results of my BMX. I am heavy and have short chemo hair, so I look like a man. I have taken to wearing earrings and makeup every day to make me feel more feminine. But I can hardly look at myself in the mirror and i just can't let my DH look at me naked. PTSD has been a big problem for me, due to the mutilation that has been inflicted on me. At this point I have decided to seek out an opinion about the DIEP flap from NOLA.
-
https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/82/topics/781208?page=61#idx_1804
Katsie: check out this thread. There are camisoles mentioned that have pockets where you can put a pros,,, hopefully that would solve the problem of the bra hitting your scar area. Also check out www.breastfree.org run by our very own Erica. Lots of tips there.
-
Gosh, I can relate to this subject.
I bought the beaded, foam prosthesis. They are super light weight and breathable. I'm still looking for a more comfortable bra. When I was trying on prosthesis, I also had the option of a pocketed tank or cami... Maybe the combo of the lightweight, soft prosthesis and the Cami will feel softer on your tender scar area.As for the hair loss... When I lost my hair, I wouldn't go anywhere without a hat. I didn't have a wig, so I wore my hat always. I was lucky since it was winter while I was on chemo. But with the hot flashes I was having... Wearing a hat would sometimes set me on fire! However, it was harder to hide my hair loss on my face. I noticed people staring. I wondered what they might be thinking... Did they think I had poor taste in make up, that maybe I was heavy handed with the eyebrow pencil? We're they taking pitty on me? Either way, I just wished I fit into the crowd like everyone else.
I finished chemo on the last day of February and my hair is growing back, 2 inches short and crazy curly. Bras have been incredibly uncomfortable, so I walk around flat. All a huge self esteem buster. People still stare. But this time I wonder if they think I'm trying to look like a man... I wear my husbands t shirts often since I gained 40 lbs on chemo and fighting with tamoxifen induced menopause. So, recently I decided to go shopping for some bigger clothes. Trying to look more feminine.I understand how you gals are feeling. Your not alone. I sometimes wonder if we're being our worse critics. I try to find happiness in the fact that I'm still here walking the earth and I'm trying to remember this is temporary. : )
Michelle
-
Silicone type "bandage" that you can cut and form to your scar exist. It is flesh colored/nude type color. My derm said it was the best product out there for minimizing scars. I wore it for about a month and mine are barely detectable. May be worth a try.
https://www.amazon.com/ScarAway-Professional-Silic...
-
If you have sensitive skin, the adhesive on scar strips may make you itchy; I had to stop using them due to that, however, I can use silicone or dimethicone gels on my scars and it doesn't cause the itching.
Silicone gel will be more expensive than dimethicone based gel, but it's a bit more effective and works a little faster than dimethicone based gels or creams.
I've been using NewGel+ E on mine for about a month now; as a bonus, it also makes an excellent foundation primer (most foundation primers are silicone based--for the higher end ones--or dimethicone based anyway!) too.
Categories
- All Categories
- 679 Advocacy and Fund-Raising
- 289 Advocacy
- 68 I've Donated to Breastcancer.org in honor of....
- Test
- 322 Walks, Runs and Fundraising Events for Breastcancer.org
- 5.6K Community Connections
- 282 Middle Age 40-60(ish) Years Old With Breast Cancer
- 53 Australians and New Zealanders Affected by Breast Cancer
- 208 Black Women or Men With Breast Cancer
- 684 Canadians Affected by Breast Cancer
- 1.5K Caring for Someone with Breast cancer
- 455 Caring for Someone with Stage IV or Mets
- 260 High Risk of Recurrence or Second Breast Cancer
- 22 International, Non-English Speakers With Breast Cancer
- 16 Latinas/Hispanics With Breast Cancer
- 189 LGBTQA+ With Breast Cancer
- 152 May Their Memory Live On
- 85 Member Matchup & Virtual Support Meetups
- 375 Members by Location
- 291 Older Than 60 Years Old With Breast Cancer
- 177 Singles With Breast Cancer
- 869 Young With Breast Cancer
- 50.4K Connecting With Others Who Have a Similar Diagnosis
- 204 Breast Cancer with Another Diagnosis or Comorbidity
- 4K DCIS (Ductal Carcinoma In Situ)
- 79 DCIS plus HER2-positive Microinvasion
- 529 Genetic Testing
- 2.2K HER2+ (Positive) Breast Cancer
- 1.5K IBC (Inflammatory Breast Cancer)
- 3.4K IDC (Invasive Ductal Carcinoma)
- 1.5K ILC (Invasive Lobular Carcinoma)
- 999 Just Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastasis
- 652 LCIS (Lobular Carcinoma In Situ)
- 193 Less Common Types of Breast Cancer
- 252 Male Breast Cancer
- 86 Mixed Type Breast Cancer
- 3.1K Not Diagnosed With a Recurrence or Metastases but Concerned
- 189 Palliative Therapy/Hospice Care
- 488 Second or Third Breast Cancer
- 1.2K Stage I Breast Cancer
- 313 Stage II Breast Cancer
- 3.8K Stage III Breast Cancer
- 2.5K Triple-Negative Breast Cancer
- 13.1K Day-to-Day Matters
- 132 All things COVID-19 or coronavirus
- 87 BCO Free-Cycle: Give or Trade Items Related to Breast Cancer
- 5.9K Clinical Trials, Research News, Podcasts, and Study Results
- 86 Coping with Holidays, Special Days and Anniversaries
- 828 Employment, Insurance, and Other Financial Issues
- 101 Family and Family Planning Matters
- Family Issues for Those Who Have Breast Cancer
- 26 Furry friends
- 1.8K Humor and Games
- 1.6K Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts
- 706 Recipe Swap for Healthy Living
- 704 Recommend Your Resources
- 171 Sex & Relationship Matters
- 9 The Political Corner
- 874 Working on Your Fitness
- 4.5K Moving On & Finding Inspiration After Breast Cancer
- 394 Bonded by Breast Cancer
- 3.1K Life After Breast Cancer
- 806 Prayers and Spiritual Support
- 285 Who or What Inspires You?
- 28.7K Not Diagnosed But Concerned
- 1K Benign Breast Conditions
- 2.3K High Risk for Breast Cancer
- 18K Not Diagnosed But Worried
- 7.4K Waiting for Test Results
- 603 Site News and Announcements
- 560 Comments, Suggestions, Feature Requests
- 39 Mod Announcements, Breastcancer.org News, Blog Entries, Podcasts
- 4 Survey, Interview and Participant Requests: Need your Help!
- 61.9K Tests, Treatments & Side Effects
- 586 Alternative Medicine
- 255 Bone Health and Bone Loss
- 11.4K Breast Reconstruction
- 7.9K Chemotherapy - Before, During, and After
- 2.7K Complementary and Holistic Medicine and Treatment
- 775 Diagnosed and Waiting for Test Results
- 7.8K Hormonal Therapy - Before, During, and After
- 50 Immunotherapy - Before, During, and After
- 7.4K Just Diagnosed
- 1.4K Living Without Reconstruction After a Mastectomy
- 5.2K Lymphedema
- 3.6K Managing Side Effects of Breast Cancer and Its Treatment
- 591 Pain
- 3.9K Radiation Therapy - Before, During, and After
- 8.4K Surgery - Before, During, and After
- 109 Welcome to Breastcancer.org
- 98 Acknowledging and honoring our Community
- 11 Info & Resources for New Patients & Members From the Team