It is ALL to much....

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Weneke6
Weneke6 Member Posts: 88
edited October 2016 in Waiting for Test Results

Ok. I have been trying....hard to keep busy until biopsy on Friday for microcars. I have tried reading the boards. Not getting much support form family and friends whom I have told. ALL are saying it will be fine, don't get upset,it's nothing. Unfortunately I know know way to much about mastectomy and drains. About being flat and mets.

This board is great and funny,yet so scary with information that can scare the ..... out of you. I have tried to listen(when it comes to info) to three main posters when it comes to info. But tonight when I was in the one of the masectemy without recon threads a lot of info about about dcis and mets was said and it contradicted some truths I have been holding close to help me when this all goes south. That way to many with DCIS go to Mets. How calcifications sometimes are advanced cancer... That you can get mets without having a primary....All of this sent me into such a panic I felt I could breath.

No, I have not been diagnosed,but unlike before when many could say I overreacted, there is actually something on my mammo. Something that is being sent to biopsy and something that no matter how hard I look on these boards seem to ALWAYs spell out cancer. I have micro calcifications that have changed/new on my mammo that were not there last year. I cainn't find anyone my age(42) that had them that then were benign.

Have tried so hard to be brave, for my 6 year old. But all I can do now is think of because she is adopted,how she already lost one mother and now could lose me..... I have never felt this low and scared in my life. Ever. Everything hurts. I am trying to teach myself to sleep on my back, starring at my closet, my wedding pics, my daughter sleeping.....

I'm sorry, but I have nowhere else and and I feel like I am drowning....

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Comments

  • Kcabrera
    Kcabrera Member Posts: 44
    edited October 2016

    I'm praying for you. The fear is real and that's okay. Just have faith that if this is something, you can pull through. It seem s you've been monitored closely and I imagine that's a good thing

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  • EIJ
    EIJ Member Posts: 22
    edited October 2016

    Dear Weneke6,

    I am a 45-year old mom of two who recently received benign results from my biopsy for increased micro calcification (they weren't as many in my mammogram last year too). I have to go back for a mammogram in 6 months, to be on the safe side.

    There's always hope and I pray that you will get a benign result too. While I was waiting for the results, family and friends kept telling me it will be ok, that it will be nothing. I knew they were trying to help the only way they knew how but it made me want to scream so I understand how you are feeling.

    Hang in there! Keeping busy with my kids provided me with some distractions and my dog gave me a lot of comfort too. Please keep us posted on the outcome, if you want to.

    Hugs,

    EI

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  • windingshores
    windingshores Member Posts: 704
    edited October 2016

    Often the wisest advice is to stop reading on the Internet. There is no need to read or research right now. Wait until you know what is actually going on. Watch tv or Netflix or exercise or whatever is a good distraction. Try not to think! Many of us had scares earlier in life: you learn to react only when needed. You can also get a short term, small supply of a drug like Ativan to help with sleep.

    If you do have cancer, it might be very early and easier to deal with, depending on a variety of things. When you do read up on breast cancer, I suggest reading basic info about ER/PR, HER2 and so on, in a book like the one put out by Mayo Clinic. Be aware from the start though that there is a test called the Oncotype that seems to trump all for HER2-, hormone positive folks so even lousy pathology doesn't always mean chemo or radiation.

    You know you are ahead of yourself. Since you are, though, try to get your results asap. You can do this online through a patient portal, your MD office or even medical records.

    Is today your biopsy? Good luck!!


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  • Sjacobs146
    Sjacobs146 Member Posts: 770
    edited October 2016

    Even if you have BC, you're not going anywhere soon, 98% of people diagnosed with BC live longer than 5 years. Researchers are developing new treatments all the time. My MO told me that even if I have a recurrance in a few years, there will likely be new treatments available. I agree with Windingshores, stay away from this site for a little while. After I completed treatment, I took a two month break because I became obsessed. Good luck with your biopsy, praying for B9 results for you

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  • Pandabear123
    Pandabear123 Member Posts: 94
    edited October 2016

    I'm having a scare right now and waiting for my ultra sound appointment. I'm not going to go into that because I have an encouraging post for EVERYONE! My grandmother had breast cancer in her mid 40's. She had a mastectomy. Think about how long ago that was. Well.... She's now 93. Never ever came back.

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  • Weneke6
    Weneke6 Member Posts: 88
    edited October 2016

    MY Biopsy just got cancelled because t.he places machines are down! All the other haven room until NEXT friday! Now I am angry. So I called Mayo. I am in AZ. And they set me up with an appoint next Thursday with a BS. Still a wait, but as my hubby says, it's getting as second opinion, a real breast doctor that will talk to you, and peace of mind all in one appt. Or least She will explain to me what she sees, and then according to the scheduler they have EVERYTHING there to send me immediately to a biopsy and if anything all the doctors I might need are right there.

    I am taking this as a good sign, that God wants me watched over and my mind put at rest.

    Thank you everyone. Your words mean a lot.

    My paternal grandmother had bc when she was @25. Had single masectemy and lived to be 75, dying of heart related issues. Cancer never came back. No other cancer anywhere on both sides.

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  • keepthefaith611
    keepthefaith611 Member Posts: 131
    edited October 2016

    Weinke! I am stunned and happy that your biopsy was cancelled! I know you were waiting for Friday for at least a week! To be told the machinery was down must have been devastating but on the flip side, you are now gong to a BC specialist, to Mayo Hospital!!!! and you will now get your results within 24-48 hours in that setting versus the place you have been dealing with - I am 100% with your husband on this one.

    I agree the internet will give you all the "horror" stories before the "I had a B9 biopsy" stories. I do believe "prepare for the worst and expect the best". If reading posts here are giving you more anxiety - take a little break and enjoy today through next Thursday 10/14. I will be looking for your update on 10/15 and your B9 on 10/17!

    ELJ - great reply to someone experiencing something similar to your situation. Thanks for taking time to share to all.

    KTF



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