Today:I was told I have Invasive ductal carcinoma

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  • tsoebbin
    tsoebbin Member Posts: 474
    edited August 2016

    great advice radgirl!

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  • Miles
    Miles Member Posts: 62
    edited August 2016

    Thank you. It is nice to know that I have people in my corner.

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  • seq24
    seq24 Member Posts: 530
    edited August 2016

    Hi Miles, Just wanted to let you know that you are not alone! This is a great place to be with a wealth of information and support. I'm a month out (yesterday in fact) from my diagnoses. I have cried many times daily. It somehow makes us feel better. I try not to have a meltdown in front of others but whenever I talk to someone who has not heard the news here come the tears again. I had surgery last week Monday, am recovering just fine from that, but am still a constant bucket of tears at what I know still lies ahead. Others on here can attest to that! I have received so much support on this site and would never have made it to this point without all the wonderful ladies on here. You have lots of people who care my friend. Please be in touch!

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  • loriann
    loriann Member Posts: 139
    edited August 2016

    Well, not that I wanted to join the party again but here I am anyway! Just got a positive diagnosis after making it 8 years from original diagnosis. Did I cry..absolutely...then I put my boxing gloves on and prepared to kick ass....again.....then a little later, I cried...again. Its a rollercoaster and its perfectly ok to go with and express whatever emotion you're feeling. I am CHOOSING to remain positive (as much as I can, when I can) and continue to live my life happily. I choose this because I know there will be days when I feel terrible, angry, sad, etc....but I will not let them change who I am! These boards helped me alot the first time around...and I am counting on them to do it again! Wishing all of you the strength to make it through.....life on the other side of cancer is waiting!!

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  • Romers143
    Romers143 Member Posts: 8
    edited August 2016

    I'm triple negative as well KZ1966 & Carolann4. I'm 36 with 4 babies including a 9 month old so hell yes it's ok to cry Miles. I did. I want to be strong for them but I think it's good for them to know the seriousness of this too and know momma is scared. I chose to fight and I chose to live BUT it doesn't mean I'm not terrified. You cry and you scream and you do whatever you need to in order to keep putting one foot in front of the other and fight!! These boards allowed me to ask questions and know what I going to hear before I heard it from the drs. I knew what to expect bc of these women! It's a lot of info but without it I don't know how I would have gotten through. I was just Dx on 8/3 so I'm just 3 weeks ahead of the journey you're getting ready to take. You can do this. And we will all do it together!

    Dx 8/3/2016, IDC, Right, 4.3cm, Stage 2B, Grade 3, 0/3 nodes, ER-/PR-, HER2- (Triple Neg). Chemo - 8/25/16 (4 rounds AC every other week then 12 rounds weekly of taxol).

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  • Miles
    Miles Member Posts: 62
    edited August 2016

    I am so very grateful for all of you. I hate the situation that bc brings to all of our lives; but I honestly love ya'll. I am going to the Surgeon right now. I will check in when I get back. Thank you for standing up and making a difference.

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  • seq24
    seq24 Member Posts: 530
    edited August 2016

    Here for you! Sending hugs!

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited August 2016

    Dear Romers143,

    Welcome to the BCO community. We are so sorry for your diagnosis but very glad that you reached out to our members. We are sending you warm wishes as you begin your chemotherapy. Please keep us posted. The Mods

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  • Miles
    Miles Member Posts: 62
    edited August 2016

    Wow... what a ride the past five days have been...on the 20th I started this discussion with "Today: I was told that I have invasive ductal carcinoma and was trying not to cry and thought that was what it ment to be tough.

    Now, I have redefined tough, by hearing from, being supported by and reading about truly tough, strong women. I was told that things would get easier once I had a treatment plan and honestly didn't believe that anything could ease my deep sadness. I was wrong. I still have some sadness and I know that there will be hard times ahead. However, now that I have been to the doctor/Surgen and was told that He was a member of a team that would be assisting me to become cancer free and was informed about what was going to happen; I do feel hopeful. I think that I felt powerless and out of control after I was given my diagnoses over the phone. Now I know that I have all of you, a team of Doctors, all of the researchers, and people that I didn't expect to show up in my life supporting me; I can and will walk through this Hard thing.

    Thank you all for making a difference in my life.


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  • Kimmer33
    Kimmer33 Member Posts: 386
    edited August 2016

    Miles, I private messaged you, did you get it?

    Kim

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  • radgal
    radgal Member Posts: 100
    edited September 2016

    Hi Miles,

    I was just thinking about you on this Friday of Labor Day weekend and I see that you just had your surgery a few days ago. Hoping and praying it went well. Welcome to this side of cancer --> survivor!!


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  • Miles
    Miles Member Posts: 62
    edited September 2016

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  • Michellelynn875
    Michellelynn875 Member Posts: 21
    edited September 2016

    Cry sweetheart. We all did! How are you doing now?

    I cried allot. I eventually got pass the crying and went into fight mode. Now I just cry once in awhile. Missing the old me...

    There are social workers and support groups with people just like us....

    Michelle

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  • Cjs47
    Cjs47 Member Posts: 61
    edited September 2016

    Hi Miles,

    I'm sorry for what you are going thru and for the tough days ahead, but I want you to know that you can do it!!!! I was where you are now almost two years ago. I cried and screamed then pulled myself together and got back to kicking butt. Don't let anyone tell you that it's not ok to be sad, mad, or just plain pissed off!!! People will tell you to just be positive and you will get thru this and you will, but that doesn't mean that having an occasional breakdown means that you aren't positive or strong. You do what works for you and what makes you feel good to fight this beast. Stay strong and my thoughts and prayers are with you. YOU CAN DO THIS

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  • 123abc1611
    123abc1611 Member Posts: 29
    edited September 2016

    I was diagnosed in 1997 with the same type of breast cancer as you and also had 6 positive nodes. I'm still here in 2016 to type this reply to you so be aware it's not a death sentence as it once was. Just take it day by day and do what your healthcare professionals recommend, and it will all be in the past before you know it.

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  • ChiSandy
    ChiSandy Member Posts: 12,133
    edited September 2016

    Cry. Scream. Throw things (that you don’t mind getting broken). Hit inanimate stuff (like with boxing gloves, at the gym). Go out to a free-fire zone and shoot cereal boxes, tin cans and dead refrigerators (or to a gun range and aim at where the tumor is on the paper target). Indulge in no-calorie, no-alcohol pleasures (entertainment and “retail therapy”). Then forge ahead.

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  • Miles
    Miles Member Posts: 62
    edited September 2016

    Thank you for taking the time to write to me again. How did you all know that I needed support right now? The last few days I have chided myself as being "week" because I find myself breaking down over the ideas of treatments that I haven't even been told I have to have. I think that the not knowing has been difficult for me.

    Monday, I went to my Radiation Oncologist and he said that I would have 28 full breast treatments. He said that he wanted me to first go to my Medical Oncologist and talk to him about Chemo and to a Genetic councilor about my family history. He also said that if it was okay with me ; he would present my case to the breast cancer board on Thursday {Yesterday (I said yes please do.)}. He told me that my Medical Oncologist would be able to discus with me what my team and the board recommends in my case.

    Immediately following my Appointment; I went to see the Genetic councilor (who had dropped her scheduled work to meet with me right then and there.) We went over all of my family history. She had me sign paper work. Her office was located in the Hospital and she walked me to the lab to have my blood taken for a panel of tests. She informed me that if I tested positive; I would most likely be getting a dbl mastectomy...

    within 30 minutes after living her office I was crying.... Crying over milk that has not even been split ..... And I have been on and off ever since.....

    I am doing what I can to be active and distract my mind from thinking about the "what if's" because I know that I will do whatever I need to do to. I can accept whatever comes.... I don't understand why I have tears or feel such loss over all of this.... it isn't logical....

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  • Jenwith4kids
    Jenwith4kids Member Posts: 635
    edited September 2016

    More cyber hugs for you Miles.

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  • Miles
    Miles Member Posts: 62
    edited September 2016

    Thank you!

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  • MaggieMae123
    MaggieMae123 Member Posts: 38
    edited September 2016

    Hi Miles, I cried a lot too when I was first diagnosed. I was in denial at first too. It will get much easier once you start your treatment. Then you know you are on your path to getting rid of it. I wish you the very best. Hugs to you!

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  • Romers143
    Romers143 Member Posts: 8
    edited September 2016

    Sweetie I hate to break it to you but cancer isn't logical therefore your response doesn't have to be. This is all a lot at one time and no matter how ready you are for it, you're not. Well at least there will be times you're not. There's nothing wrong with it. Like I said before I'm a few weeks ahead of you so I'm on round 3 of AC this week. Well my hair fell out right after round two so when it started I shaved it. If you had asked me the day before if I was ready I would have told you 100% yep, hairs going, I'm already ok with it. Well when those clippers started, I lost it. I wasn't ready. But sometimes we don't get a choice in when we are ready we just have to keep going so I did. And now I'm rocking scarves like no ones business ;) My point is you're crying over milk that hasn't spilled yet bc you're mourning what is coming. There's nothing wrong with that. In fact Miles there's nothing wrong with however you react to ANY of this. Just like each one of us respond to the chemo different we respond to the cancer diagnosis differently.

    I'm not having my double mastectomy until after I'm finished chemo and heal. So probably around Feb. But I'm already mourning the loss of the boobs that I really didn't even care about before. But now that they're getting taken away from me, I want them! So it's ok to cry and mourn what will happen. I'm convinced that helps you prepare what may happen the best way possible.

    Hugs

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  • seq24
    seq24 Member Posts: 530
    edited September 2016

    Romers--That is excellent advice! So glad you're halfway through AC. I have round two on Friday. My hair is still there, but I know the day is coming soon where it won't be. I don't think I will be one to wear a scarf (head is too big), so I'm stuck with wigs. I think on occasion I'm ready for this to happen, then I'll melt in to a puddle of tears over it 5 minutes later. You have such a good outlook on this! Those of us who are very scared of the process are so fortunate to have people like you to share their experiences and positive outlook. Thank you so much!

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  • Miles
    Miles Member Posts: 62
    edited September 2016

    Hugs.. to all of you... I'm struggling and rereading this thread has helped. Thank you for your kind and supportive words. Thank you for sharing your experiences.

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  • lucygirl64
    lucygirl64 Member Posts: 1
    edited September 2016

    I too, was just diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma on Aug.25, 2016. I have cried at least once every day and I am not a Cryer normally. I think we have to give into what we're feeling. Let it out and try to get on with your day. It's difficult. I don't feel sick, but I feel as though all my energy has been zapped. Time is standing get still.

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  • Miles
    Miles Member Posts: 62
    edited September 2016

    I totally agree with the energy zapped feeling. Time does seem to stand still as we wait for..... The next step.

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  • bluepearl
    bluepearl Member Posts: 961
    edited September 2016

    Miles: It would be very odd if you didn't cry and weren't sad. Tears flowed for me on an almost continuous basis, sometimes right in public. I'd cry down the street (wearing sunglasses), I'd cry in the hospital halls, I'd cry on my walks in the woods, I'd cry at night. It is actually healing in process. It took me a fair bit of time to get my mojo back (esp being diagnosed again) but I did. You will work through it. ((((HUGS))))

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