Surgery question- did someone stay at the hospital with you?

My surgery was local to me, so my husband just stayed at home and came back to pick me up the next morning.
The recovery suites where I had mine done only had one bed in the room and it was the one I was wheeled in on. There was a recliner as well, but nothing that I'd have considered comfortable enough to sleep in. The nurses did tell him he could stay if he wanted to, but given his back and the fact that without his cpap he snores like a chainsaw, the answer to that was 'no' from both of us.

I would guess that the policies on whether or not your 'sponsor' (that's what they called it at the hospital I went to; the person who drove you there and plans to drive you home) is allowed to stay the night or not; I'd recommend contacting your surgeon or the facility you'll be staying at and asking if it's okay for him to stay/if there would be or could be accommodations for him to stay, or if you should plan to book a hotel room nearby for him.

If you'd just rather err on the side of caution, book a hotel room nearby to start, then make your calls to the facility and your surgeon to find out if he can stay in the hospital overnight or not; if he can, great, you can cancel the hotel reservation. If he can't, you've already got him a hotel room booked.

I always think it's a good idea for a loved one to be with you while you're in the hospital, if possible, but I realize that this doesn't always work out. My DH has lung & heart disabilities, so he needs a lot of rest. Well, nobody gets much rest in the hospital, especially that first night after surgery--they will be coming in every hour or two to check your vital signs, look at your dressings, give you meds, and get you up to the bathroom. I elected to have DH stay at the hospital during the day and sent him home about 7pm, so he could get a long night's sleep. The nursing staff took great care of me while he was gone. He came back up there the next day and took me home (I did not have recon, just the BMX.) If you're having recon, you'll be staying longer--your doctor can tell you how many days to expect.

Whether your DH stays with you will depend on several things, most notably, whether you are in a private room. If you are in a shared or semi-private room your DH will not be allowed to stay overnight, due to privacy issues. Some hospitals have seating that fold out into small beds or have narrow recliners that you can "sleep" in (and note the quotation marks--nobody can sleep in those torture traps.) Find out from your doctor what the room arrangement is (private or semi-private) and then you can call the hospital and ask how they accommodate family members staying overnight. If you have to spend a night or two in the ICU (normal after DIEP), your DH probably will not be allowed to spend the night in there, and most hospitals don't have any alternative sleeping locations.

Meg... I would say if he can stay it will be helpful to you. I need my husband throughout the night during some of my hospital stays. But everybody's different, and if you think your husband would be very supportive and he's willing, I'd say yes!

My hospital ad a pull out chair bed and a family member was welcome to stay. My dd would stay until I fell asleep and then go home. I have had several surgeries and didn't feel I needed anyone to stay with me, but it made her feel better. Since this is your first surgery, having someone with you might be comforting.

i had a nipple sparing / skin sparing bmx with TE on 7/27. I went in at 7:30, both my sister and husband were there in pre-op. i woke up in my room sometime around 5:00 that night and both my sister and my husband were in my room. there were two beds in my room, my husband left sometime after i woke up to take care of our two kids, my sister spent the next two nights with me, comming and going through out the day, but they let her spend the night. she just pulled up the bed next to mine, we set up my laptop, watched movies, and when i fell asleep she put her bed back so that the nurse could get to me. the staff were fantastic. it was really nice to have company and someone who would get me to get moving as i had no desire to get out of bed.

I never even thought of someone staying the night in the hospital with me. I knew I would need help at home for awhile and didn't want to wear anyone out. Also, I've spent probably 50 nights all together at the children's hospital sleeping in one of those chairs or an awful cot, so I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

No, my husband and sons left late and my husband came back early the next day to take me home. I really didn't use pain meds so I wasn't groggy and could call the nurses just fine. I had a BMX with no recon (plus axillary dissection) so my stay was only overnight

If I have the option, I will never again stay overnight in a hospital without having someone there ( friend or family) to advocate for me. I realize i might not end up needing their help. But, if there is a problem, I want the "insurance" of having someone there to help me.

My experience- I had a mastectomy and DIEP recon done in a supposedly "good" local Maryland hospital. The post op pain started to climb and I rang for the nurse to get pain meds (as I was supposed to do.) I waited and waited. The pain climbed to excruciating intensity and still no nurse. I was unable to get out of bed to get a nurse. I ended up calling my husband and asked him to get to the hospital to help me.

As a retired nurse, I always say yes...have someone stay with you. You never know when you will need help and nursing staff may not be available. Sometimes you just need someone there to stand up for you...remind them you didn't get your pm medicine, dinner tray, need a pain injection etc

Hi- Our family experience is that is is very important for a loved one to stay overnight...for help, support, and...hopefully...for some fun stories if nothing happens out of the ordinary.  Of course...if something comes up- they are there for you...most important of all!

IHGJAnn, if you are having a lumpectomy you can pretty easily take care of yourself once you get home. Put things down low for easy reach and plan to not be able to lift anything over 10 lbs. Ice packs will be your best friend, be sure to ask your doctor if you can use ice most recommend it. Have button down shirts, easy to pull on pants and whatever bra the hospital tells you to use.

I didn't want anyone to stay so that I could sleep and rest. The nurses were attentive and, honestly, as a busy mother of little kids, I took a chance to allow myself some peace and quiet - even under less than desirable circumstances