Diagnoses/biopsy results

best wishes for your surgery tomorrow.

ChiSandy, I totally agree with you and have made similar points earlier. seq24, your doctors need to have your written and verbal agreement to go through with any procedures. If you reread the earlier part of this thread, you will see that many members were urging you to find a different surgeon! As it's probably too late for that, I truly hope that you won't consent to having a port installed when the need for it has not in any way been established. Also with the axillary node removal, I had to have it with my second BC but it was difficult to heal from and nothing you've said about your diagnosis makes me think you would need one yet. Sorry to sound bossy, it's just hard to think of someone having far too much invasive surgery and chemo that isn't yet warranted.

Oh I totally agree with everyone when it comes to the port. I refused it, even if I had to go through chemo. I just didn't think that 4 treatments (and even 6 as it was initially proposed to me) warranted more surgeries. My hand is fine and took the IVs great.

Thinking of you seq24. Hugs.

Hi seq24:

Sleep well! Sending good wishes for the best possible pathology results.

BarredOwl

seq, did you consider cold capping if you must do chemo? Sounds like you would like to keep your hair. This surgeon sounds scary to me. My breast surgeon did an extensive mri before, he was 90% my nodes would be negative after the MRI. My surgeon was very cautious, he took 2 nodes and did not put in port.

This doctor sounds scary to me that he isn't giving you details and reasons for what he is doing. I would high tail it out of there.

Also, don't let your husband drive your health care decisions, especially because of expediency or costs. It's your breast, your body......and your life.

And do your homework--find out how many of your surgeon’s and your MO’s patients get chemo. If it’s a high percentage, that is a HUGE red flag. It would be analogous to my husband ordering an echocardiogram on every patient who walks in with a cold, sprained ankle, needs a flu shot or a work physical because he has that echo machine and needs to recoup the costs. (He doesn’t do that, of course, but you get my drift).

There is lots of hope! I was Stage 2 with 3/12 positive nodes. I had an unsuccessful lumpectomy followed by mastectomy. 4 rounds of chemo and radiation. I am now on tamoxifen and I am CANCER FREE one year later. My doctors never painted a dismal picture. Stage 2 is not a death sentence in any shape or form. I would say if you don't like your doctors, switch! Go with doctors that you trust and feel comfortable with. I had so much encouragement throughout all my treatment that I even trained and ran a marathon while in the midst of it. Try to stay as positive as possible. I know it's hard to do. One year from now this will all be in your rearview mirror and you will have a long life ahead of you!

Be careful when you are out in the world with the drain . You are at risk of infection until it's out. Also please remember you are recovering from surgery and be kind to yourself.

There are so many drugs available now that make chemo "bearable". I took Emend for 3 days following chemo which helped. I didn't have awful side effects. I didn't feel great but I wasn't on death's door either. The worst part of chemo for me were the steroids. I couldn't sleep while on them. When I tried to taper them down, I felt worse so it really was a toss up - no sleep and feel better OR sleep and feel sick. But this too shall pass and although none of it was pleasant it is all doable. Just take one day at a time - don't predict you will feel awful...you may not! I only missed 1 1/2 days of work for chemo. One day was to actually receive the treatment and 1/2 I left early because I was feeling not-so-great.

Also - I didn't lose my hair. I used penguin caps and saved my hair which was huge for me. I didn't feel like a sick person because I didn't look like a sick person.

And exercise does help! Even just a walk around the block. Get those toxins moving out.

You truly are in one of the hardest "phases" of dx and tx, which is dealing with all the "unknowns". A million of us who have been through this, could all tell you that "we get it" and that you will feel less stressed, anxious and more in control once you have all the info and a plan is in place, but until you are "there"....we also understand how impossibly difficult things appear to you right now. Movies, books and tv shows have successfully implanted in our minds, how horrendous cx tx is on someone....but like reality tv.....real life rarely mirrors these portrayals. There are ways to feel more confident however, that you can do this.

Could I make a gentle suggestion regarding your comments about not believing it's possible to use your mind to convince yourself that things are "doable"? If you read back at your messages, you might recognize that at this point....you are using your mind to convince yourself of how horrible things will be for you, how difficult your responsibilities will be to manage, how impossible this all will be to handle. All understandable emotions, but at the same time, not based on your actual experiences, but on your "mind's anticipation" of what things will be like for you. Perhaps you could share your fears with someone (pastor, counselor, compassionate nurse/etc), who might be able to help you refocus and be more open to some "positive, or at least less negative" thoughts? Those who have suggested to you that they were able to do things like exercise, work, do childcare etc., through chemo..... I don't think meant to imply they didn't feel the physical chemo affects, but more likely meant that things weren't as dire as you are anticipating, and that they learned to manage life during chemo. Taking naps when tired, maybe cutting back a bit on some optional activities, accepting help with childcare, meals, housework, etc....there are many paths to help you successfully get through chemo, rads.....whatever lies ahead for you. It is often useful to speak to your doctor, and make use of some anti-anxiety meds if things get to the "overwhelming" stage too. Sometimes, a wee bit of "chemically induced calmness" goes a long way to restoring your ability to handle things.

No one would ever honestly say that any of the various tx's for breast cancer are "fun and enjoyable", but PLEASE, try to hear the voices of those who have been through it, that it is all "doable".

I only had a mastectomy because I had no clear margins after my lumpectomy and he couldn't guarantee that another lumpectomy would give me any better results. At that point I just wanted it all to be done. Lumpectomy is WAY easier (I can say that since I had both!) -I wouldn't opt for a mastectomy unless it was recommended.

As for penguin caps - they work 85% of the time. My hair thinned and I have thin hair to begin with so my hair didn't look great for quite awhile. Plus I couldn't color it. But I had hair! And unless you knew me to know that difference in thickness, you wouldn't have known I was a cancer patient. My MO had the Rapunzel freezer (those caps have to be super cold!!!). It was definitely work and painful to do it but very thankful to keep most my hair.

The side effects - everyone is different. Hope for the best. Stay as positive as you can. I think staying busy and staying active helped me. You can let all this stuff swallow you up but don't let it. Expect that you will feel well enough to work. Expect that you will be able to do all the things you want to do.

When the marathon training was upon me I had a choice. Let cancer call the shots are me. I decided that I was not going to let this stop me from doing what I want to do. Running made me feel like a well person. Do the things you love! Don't let cancer stop you.

Seq, my mo wanted me to do chemo. I said no. If you do chemo you should read the cold caps threads. It is very encouraging that you could save your hair.

So far I'm good almost 5 years out.