Probable metastatic IBC depending on more test results

After being in remission from inflammatory breast cancer for almost 4 years, I was having a constant pain in my left side, so my primary doctor ordered an ultrasound. The ultrasound didn't find the cause of the pain, but did pick up some lesions on my liver. A CT scan of the abdominal area later showed not only tumors in my liver, but one on my spine and hip bone. My oncologist has now ordered a more complete CT scan to check my lungs, along with a bone scan and liver biopsy.

I never saw this coming. After almost 4 years in remission, I was feeling pretty confident. Smug, even! Now I'm coming to terms with the fact that I now probably have what is presently an incurable cancer. My doctor says that as soon as it is confirmed that it is indeed metastatic breast cancer, as he is almost sure it is, we'll start attacking it with chemo. He said the goal is to turn it from a terminal disease to a chronic disease.

I think I'm in shock. I haven't cried. I've remained relatively calm. But I think I feel pressure on the dam, and it may burst any day. I hated telling my family and friends, especially my daughter. I haven't told my son yet. I'm so tired of telling people and answering questions. I realize people mean well and feel helpless right now...and I am truly grateful that I have so many people in my life who care. When I was diagnosed with just the breast cancer, I knew I wasn't going to die. I didn't worry about "getting my affairs in order" or anything like that. This time...well...I should probably think of those things. Not that I'm giving up! I'll fight hard, but I am not fooling myself that this isn't much, much more serious now. Has anyone gone through or are going through this too?

Tracy