June 2016 Surgeries!

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  • Blinkie
    Blinkie Member Posts: 169
    edited June 2016

    I have surgery day after tomorrow on June 4th - lumpectomy for DCIS. Not my first time going through this. I cannot get to sleep tonight. Too much coffee? Or too many uncomfortable feelings? Or both, perhaps. I fear recurrence of serious depression and I fear cancer will return again and again. The clinic I go to is fabulous and has a team approach. That does help me feel safer. Wish I could sleep though. On Monday we have to get up around 3:45 am to reach the hospital by check in time.

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  • xxyzed
    xxyzed Member Posts: 230
    edited June 2016

    3.45am wake up time sucks but I doubt you'll be sleeping much anyway. I'm glad you feel happy with your team. You may need to get onto some sleeping tablets and counselling if the anxiety continues after the surgery. It's best to ask for help early on than wait until you've completely lost it. I'm only at the start of the first time and all I think about is when it comes back. It's not even gone for the first time yet. Good luck on your upcoming surgery

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  • Why2015
    Why2015 Member Posts: 38
    edited June 2016

    I know it is easier said than done, however, try to stay in the present and not think about what you mentioned "when it comes back". It may not come back, hopefully! I know this diagnosis tears one's life upside down. I'm living it. People are so kind to say you are so courageous, you are so brave. It is amazing what you've done during these past 10 months. They don't see the deformity through my abdomen and on the breast the surgery was done. I get all kinds of wrinkles and bumps from sleeping, it feels very very strange. I wonder if that happens to others? On the other side my midriff is smooth no problem. On surgery side, I have all kinds of wrinkles and bumps and I feel it's due to the lymph node removal. I have a giant lump on my arm so like you I'm often thinking about oh is this it coming back? No, many of the professionals will not tell you what you're going to face because many of us probably wouldn't face it. You have done it though, and you are strong, just keep focusing on healing day by day. That's all anyone can do to get through this. Stay strong XXYZed!! Just bring up any concerns you have to your medical team. Take care and wishing you well

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  • WenchLori
    WenchLori Member Posts: 1,558
    edited June 2016

    Great news Maya!

    Kellychamilion, I'm happy to hear your are doing so well! I'll keep prayers going for everyone here and wishing all an uninterrupted recovery!

    My DH has been very supportive but stays in the background. He listens to all the options I've been given and has always told me he supports me 110% but the ultimate decision is mine. I woke up yesterday morning with hubby trying to feel the lump, it was the first time he had any interest in doing so. He told me not knowing helped him to not worry so much. I've also noticed him looking at me every time a show we are watching mentions a death of a woman from breast cancer. I hate seeing the worry on his face but I feel bad as I don't have the needed energy to focus solely on him. I feel I'm a bad wife for not doing so, anyone else have these feelings also?

    I'm so much more peaceful the past few days 👍🙏

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  • xxyzed
    xxyzed Member Posts: 230
    edited June 2016

    Thanks Why2015. Unfortunately my experience with both my husband and father over the last few years was recurrence after recurrence. The first thing a counsellor said was that I have to start seeing the differences between my path and theirs which I am trying to do but I think it will be a long process.

    WenchLori. I am finding it so much easier being the patient than when I was being the carer for my husband. He suffered such terrible anxiety and horrible reactions to all the treatments. He relied on me 100% and was not comfortable with many other friends or family which was very wearing on me. Just as you need your support team your husband needs his as well to pick him up in the hard times. Please don't feel like a bad wife. Call on family, friends and professional support to get him as well as you through

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  • WenchLori
    WenchLori Member Posts: 1,558
    edited June 2016

    Thank you xxyzed, I'm just a little surprised. When I first told him I had BC he said "With things these days they can cure just about anything. It is what it is, don't worry about it." Now, he's a wonderful man and I wouldn't trade him for anything, but he's just not a sensitive man and I'm confused by his actions lol

    Why2015, I agree totally with xxyzed. I've decided to follow her advice and I'll give my DH the attention he needs from now on also 🙂

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  • tsoebbin
    tsoebbin Member Posts: 474
    edited June 2016

    My husband needed time to process at first. I wanted to talk about it 24/7. I gave him some space.

    We were at dinner Friday night and I made a comment about my damn boobs causing so many problems and he said "I've read about some women getting angry at their boobs and feeling betrayed by their bodies". I was floored. He is researching on his own. I feel so much better but didn't overreact and burst into tears like I wanted to!

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  • WenchLori
    WenchLori Member Posts: 1,558
    edited June 2016

    tsoebbin, what a great surprise for you! I love it! My hubby wouldn't even look at me when I'd tell him how my appts went, he just continued to surf his FB page. Now I let him know that I have an appt and wait for him to ask how it went when he gets home. This way he has to get off his computer to have an honest conversation. His buddy talked to him about things and was surprised that he didn't know what procedure I was having. I guess it's a guy thing :-)

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  • Maya15
    Maya15 Member Posts: 323
    edited June 2016

    I've heard it said several times it's harder to be the carer than the patient. I think carers feel guilty about their own feelings because they're not the ones with the cancer, but it's still really hard on them. I encourage my DH to spend time with his best friends who he can talk to about things he can't discuss with me. He also brought a friend to the hospital during my surgery just to be with him.

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  • WenchLori
    WenchLori Member Posts: 1,558
    edited June 2016

    Good luck on your lumpectomy tomorrow essieart! You will be in my prayers!

    Thank you Maya, I will keep that in mind. We'll see how he is next Wednesday when we get to the hospital for my DMX. I know he'll have his camera with him to video as much as the event that he can :-)

    I have my pre-op tomorrow afternoon with my PS. I'll stop by the hospital to see who my anesthesiologist is and how to get in touch with him/her about the toradol (sp) I'm hoping it's something we can get done. Thank you again everyone for all the support and information, I appreciate it greatly!

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  • rvgirl2016
    rvgirl2016 Member Posts: 67
    edited June 2016

    Hi guys.  You can add me to the list.   I'm having a mastectomy of the left breast Tuesday, June 7th.  I've been unnaturally calm about everything thus far.  Wondering if anyone else feels/felt this way?  We lost my mom last year to lung cancer, so I wonder if I'm being so blasie (sp) so my family doesn't freak out.  Time will tell I guess.

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  • Why2015
    Why2015 Member Posts: 38
    edited June 2016

    To xxyzed,

    You use as many helping hands as you need! You are in my thoughts as are all on these posts. Especially, because of the loss of your husband, and that you are raising two boys. Take care of yourself and just focus on the here and now...the say staying stress free is critical to healing.

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  • xxyzed
    xxyzed Member Posts: 230
    edited June 2016

    Thx for thinking of me Why2015. I agree a stress free life is essential to our healing.

    WenchLori I'm laughing at the thought of your hubby with his camera over the surgeons shoulder getting close ups of your insides. Could you imagine

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  • hanley50
    hanley50 Member Posts: 146
    edited June 2016

    So......I got a call from my BS office today. BCBS will only authorize a UMX! What the F@#K am I suppose to do with only 1 boob?

    This is a never ending nightmare!

    Maryann

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  • WenchLori
    WenchLori Member Posts: 1,558
    edited June 2016

    On no Maryann! What the F*** is right! You should have whatever procedures you need to make you feel whole again. 😡

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  • Maya15
    Maya15 Member Posts: 323
    edited June 2016

    Maryann, outrageous! As if we didn't have enough to deal with having cancer. Maybe you could talk to your insurance and find out what their criteria is for approving a BMX, then get your BS office to say you're in that category. I don't think it even saves them money either, since they would have to pay for MRIs and other scans on the remaining breast. Plus, you are entitled by law to any procedures on the other breast to achieve "symmetry" between the two. Surely BMX is such a procedure.

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  • WenchLori
    WenchLori Member Posts: 1,558
    edited June 2016

    I just got home from my PS appointment, all went well... I guess. The only change we made is add another TE to the plan as I'll be having a DMX instead of an MX on left and reconstruction and lift on the right. He said in my case he's not so sure about saving my nipples but we can try if I really want to take the risk of possibly having a third surgery. If things look to iffy I told him to take them. I have my pre-op at the hospital on Wednesday morning, then wait for the 15th to get here. Dr Wise made me very comfortable with all that he will be doing and I'm not so freaked out because of it. I asked questions and he asked me questions and I think we both are looking forward to my surgery. He agreed that I need to speak to my anastesiologist about the toradol. Now it's 9 days and counting!

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  • kellychameleon
    kellychameleon Member Posts: 100
    edited June 2016

    MaryAnn, that is infuriating!! I hope you'll be able to contest that with the insurance company. At the beginning of my diagnosis, I had to fight a couple things with my carrier (Aetna), but thankfully they have covered everything so far. Back in December, they denied the Pet/CT that my doctor had ordered, but my doctor contested the decision and did a peer to peer with one of their doctors. I'm just so surprised they're only wanting to cover a single, especially being triple negative. Ugh. Good luck!

    I went to the plastic surgeon's office this morning and had my staples removed. I was dreading it, and thankfully it wasn't bad at all. They're hoping to be able to remove my drains this Friday. That's way sooner than I anticipated. Recovery has continued to be smooth. Hoping to get my path results by Wednesday.

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  • WenchLori
    WenchLori Member Posts: 1,558
    edited June 2016

    It seems everyone has to wait a week or so after their surgery to get their path reports. My BS said she'd have the path report for the lymph nodes and margins while I'm still under. Is this a different path report than the one that takes a week or so to get?

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  • Blinkie
    Blinkie Member Posts: 169
    edited June 2016

    Today was surgery day for me. Arrived at hospital at 5:30 am and left - minus part of my left breast - around 11 am. Was that fast? Seemed like it to me. But then I was out like a light and slept through all the excitement. What hurt the most was only the IV port on the back of my hand.

    I didn't cry until I'd been home a while and then tears arrived suddenly, without a prelude.

    I had a positive experience with all the staff; everything was oriented towards patient comfort. When I woke up I was soooo hungry; they gave me a choice of snacks so I had a coffee and a morning glory muffin. & the compression 'bandage" that goes around me is like a little camisole - white with tiny flowers. Much better than something that looks like an ace bandage.

    Knock on wood: I'm not in pain, only a bit uncomfortable. I'm taking codeine with tylenol.

    Path report on Thursday; followup appointments on Friday.

    Now I am on the couch being Dopey and listening to the radio show Cabin Pressure. My fav.

    Thanks for listening to my story. I hope you all find some comfort today.


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  • WenchLori
    WenchLori Member Posts: 1,558
    edited June 2016

    Great news essieart, I'm praying everything goes smoothly for your recovery!
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  • Kaileigh7
    Kaileigh7 Member Posts: 2
    edited June 2016

    Hi All :) I was diagnosed May 10 with invasive ductal carcinoma. I am choosing a double mastectomy for sure -already have implants (D cup) so I'm deciding between expanders and just going direct to implant? I don't want my breast size to be any bigger it's just that I got 2 opinions from 2 different hospitals suggesting these options. I know a lot of women go with expanders but can someone offer advice or experiences on going direct to implant?

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  • grandma3X
    grandma3X Member Posts: 759
    edited June 2016
    WenchLori- you will get a full path report several days after the MX. They can look at the lymph nodes while you are still out to give your doctor some preliminary findings - if they are positive, the BS may take out more modes. But then they will also do a more detailed examination of the nodes after the initial report and this will be included on the final pathology.

    MaryAnne - I also have BCBS basic. They covered the MX of my cancer side in January and then also covered the PMX of my no cancer side in May. There was a law passed in 1998 I think that made it necessary for insurance companies to cover MX and reconstruction as much as it takes to achieve the patient's satisfaction. If you have a benefits office where you work, they may be able to help you. I'm surprised that your doctor did not know this as well! Definitely worth looking into further!
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  • WenchLori
    WenchLori Member Posts: 1,558
    edited June 2016

    Welcome Kaileigh, as everyone here says, sorry you joined us but glad you found us!

    I just had this same conversation with my PS yesterday. My Dr told me if I want to go a little smaller than I am right now he can do direct to implant. Seeing that I want to be a little bigger than I am we've decided TEs are the way to go. He explained that it all depends on how much skin my BS can spare from the MX. Not much of an answer but it's all I have to go on. I'm sure there are a lot of others here that have gone direct to implant that can give you a more definitive answer 😀

    Best wishes and prayers for your upcoming surgery and treatment 🙏🙏

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  • WenchLori
    WenchLori Member Posts: 1,558
    edited June 2016

    Thank you Gma, that makes me feel a lot better. My BS didn't go into much detail and I didn't know enough then to question her about it. Everything kinda went in one ear and out the other! All I heard was IDC!Knowing there will be an in depth report done makes me feel not so left out lol

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  • Hopefloatsinyyc
    Hopefloatsinyyc Member Posts: 211
    edited June 2016

    the plan for me is direct to implant and PS is confident he can make that happen but won't guarantee it in case the BS has to take too much skin or tissue. He won't compromise the overall success and will place TE's if absolutely necessary- but I am going slightly smaller so he feels it should work by using alloderm to create a sling for the implant vs. Creating a pocket with a TE.

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  • Jnnfrthsn
    Jnnfrthsn Member Posts: 1
    edited June 2016

    Date for NSBMX pending, but will be in June. Meet with plastics this week to discuss reconstruction

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  • CrawfordsMommy
    CrawfordsMommy Member Posts: 68
    edited June 2016

    Well, here I am sitting on the other side of BMX. I'm still hooked up to drains, and I don't like that because they itch, but 5 days post surgery I feel more normal than I thought I would. I have almost full range of motion in both arms. I just sort of feel like when I work out too hard/lift too many weights, except not even that bad. I hurt worse on abs day, seriously.

    I had a pain pump installed, but it ran out already so yesterday I pulled the catheters out. I haven't needed so much as a tylenol.

    I was in surgery for like 3.5 hours... I lucked out because all my nodes were negative and the surgeon didn't take any out. He biopsied every one though. I woke up after surgery and peed blue and scared an intern. My husband (who has been through similar) and I just laughed at the windex pee.

    I'm nice and slick on the Left side (the cancer side) but the Right side (prophylactic) has a 'stump' or a dog-ear on my sternum. Prior to surgery my breasts were uneven anyway and the right side was sort of lopsided. So now I have this thing like a unicorn horn sticking out. I call it my sternicorn. I'm going to have to get a plastic surgeon after it, I think. It will show through clothes and snag on bras.

    Had a good time horrifying my family showing them my scars; now, I just wait a long, long week until I get these itchy drains out. Then later on I guess I find out what the rest of my treatment's going to be.

    I tried wearing the surgical cami with the 'soft' breast forms, but that went extremely poorly. Hated the breast forms. Will not wear them.

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  • chapagonzo
    chapagonzo Member Posts: 13
    edited June 2016

    Wanted to reach out to you all and wrap my arms around you. I had a bilateral mastectomy on March 15 with immediate tissue expanders in both. I still have the expanders in and they will remain until four weeks post chemo. My last chemo is July 13th. Not one to claim to know it all but looking back on the experience I would tell you this:

    Expect to be sore, if is really hard to get out of bed. I used a lot of pillows and was forced to sleep on my back...for a while. If you have a recliner, it def makes things easier.

    Take your meds....take your meds...take your meds. I believe it is all part of the formula to your quick healing. I set the alarm on my phone so my sister did not have to get up and give them to me. I had a pill box right next to the bed and had them in order for the night. This was key for me. Also have something to drink there because getting up and down is no fun. The trips to the bathroom are going to be taxing enough.

    Take care of those drains. I did not find this too difficult. I kept my corset on at all times and it keep the drains tight to my side. I pinned the drains to the front of the corset and it just made it easier. Mine came out on day 9 and it did not hurt at all. Make sure to call your drain totals in as instructed.

    I ate small meals. Homemade soups are easy and go down smooth. Yogurt, fruit.....simple stuff.

    I did sit on a medical chair on day three in the bathtub and wash my lower body. It was the best. It can be done....just make sure someone is with you and go SLOW.

    There is not getting around it...if you get expanders your chest will be tight. Not tight like you can't breathe...but tight. Hot showers, slow breathing seemed to help me. It is not a cake walk but you can do it.

    I was driving on day 14, just like the PS said I could. Holding on and doing things that feel normal and routine are essential for me.

    I still have my bad days. Gee, like we are suppose to be happy about this. Just know I am thinking of you all and you have my deepest prayers.

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  • xxyzed
    xxyzed Member Posts: 230
    edited June 2016

    Its all happening for me tomorrow. Day 8 post Bi lateral mastectomy and axillary lymph node clearance my remaining two drains are getting pulled, discharged from the hospital and then across to the surgeons rooms to get my path results. Given we already know it was in my lymph nodes I can't see the results making any changes to the treatment plan. I hope all coming up for surgery aren't freaking out too much and all who have been are recovering well

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