When does it become "real?"

Hello ladies I too am early 40's (41). I was diagnosed March 15th and it still don't feel real. I had chosen to go with a lumpectomy trying to save my breast after genetics came back normal, that was 2 1/2 weeks ago. The morning of the surgery my surgeon told me she was also going to remove another area of concern that had earlier been ruled out to be anything, and I was fine with that let's get this out of the way and move on. Well when pathology came back she let me know that not only site b came back to be invasive lobular carcinoma but when clearing the margins for that area she came across another area and she removed some of that to have tested which in turn also turned out to be cancer as well with the negative did come a positive no lymph nodes came back positive. Still in shock over everything. I thought I was well on my way to moving forward to have to find out that it would be best for me to go ahead with the masectomy. In all honesty that choice was easy I cannot keep going through this and putting the family through it. The unknowns are too scary.

It was "real" for me as soon as I got the call that there were "areas of concern" on a routine mammogram. I have a strong family history. I lost my mom and sister to breast cancer, and my paternal grandmother was a breast cancer survivor. So, regardless of what the radiologist said (80% is benign), I knew this was not the case for lil ole me.

When I found out it was DCIS, I was grateful. Yay! That's not "real" cancer. I'm not swimming in the pink ribbon pool. I'm just tipping my big toe into the water.

I opted for a BMX, and pathology found IDC, 1.5 cm. That's when it became really real.

You have to ask for help. It actually helps other people to help you. Ask them to make you food. It's easy for them and they love to do it. See if someone can get you a cleaning lady! That was the best gift yet!! Last thing I wanted to do was clean!! I do feel like I'm in a cloud sometimes even almost a year later. I try not to dwell, too many bad things come from dwelling. I have 3 beautiful children and they are what I look forward to! It all is real tho and it sucks! I'm not trying to be negative just honest. This is unfortunately becoming way too common now and I felt when I was diagnosed I just said well, let's get rid of this crap and move on with my life! I think, obviously, I'm a bit more angry than sad but that fuels me to keep moving forward. Keep your head up and stay positive.

Me too hsant. I remember the day 2 weeks after my routine mammo I was thinking I hadn't gotten my "all clear" card in the mail and then I got the phone call from the nurse. She said one breast was bigger than the other. Of course I bombarded her with questions she couldn't and wouldn't answer and I was left with I bet I have BC. I knew. I'd never ever been called back in after I left the clinic. I was remarkably calm considering.

I was in a fog going through the motions for weeks. BS appt, surgery for lumpectomy, follow up surgery evening the margins, 33 Rads treatments and Tamoxifen. Now 5 years out in August I know I am not out of the woods and probably never will be but time does help. I had a low Oncotype test score which is encouraging. No guarantees but definitely a positive sign.

We are all branded with the C word. We have to live with that but it doesn't have to define us.

Diane

hello all i was diagnosed at 42 while planning our 2nd wedding wanted lumpectomy opted for mastectomy Praise God now a 22 yr Survivor hang in there HOPE n Positive thinking got me thru just had annual mammogram last wk Thank God normal for right breast. msphil idc stage 2 0\3nodes L mast chemo n rads n 5yrs on tamoxifen.