BRCA1&2, Mastectomy approaching how to keep life in the norm

I am not very computer savy, so I dont know how to add a link. Please look up Amy Cohen's moth radio story. She is brca positive and tells her brave story of choosing to have a bmx.

I am brca 2 positive. My father died of breast cancer and I am now stage IV. Iknow the unknown is scary. And bmx and reconstruction, if you choose it, are not small surgries. You can get through it with the help of your loving family. For me having someone help with the drains and getting good instruction before leaving the hospital was very important. Please feel free to ask me any question. I wish you peace.

Mary

Hello. I had a BMX followed by reconstruction after I was diagnosed with cancer. What I find important is that one needs to be convinced of one's choice. Then there are no regrets. Psychologically it was not an easy journey for me. It took me a while to get used to the new me. But now I feel I am in a good place again. I finished the second phase of reconstruction (implant exchange) last Feb. I will be having nipple reconstruction some time later this year, meanwhile I am using nipple prostheses. It is a long process. I don't know if you have chosen to have a reconstruction or not. I spent some time with breast prostheses and I was happy with them too, especially when I was given a very pretty bra to hold them in. I think we adapt to everything. But it does take time. I really missed my breasts. But I was convinced of my decision. Surprisingly I feel I look good, better than I did before cancer actually because I take care of my appearance much more than I did before. I have made it a point to buy pretty and smart clothes (they don't need to be expensive) in which I feel good and I have learnt to apply make-up really nicely - so I get a lot of compliments even by people who have no clue what I have passed through. I also increased exercise and I go walking often near the sea. It helps me clear my mind. And it all makes me feel good about myself. Get psychological support if you need it. I did go to therapy and it helped me a lot. 

Regarding the surgery - I was back to work 6 days after my mastectomy. My colleagues were amazed to see me back. I recommend getting hold of foam prostheses before your surgery ( I was given them by the hospital) - I left hospital wearing them in an old loose bra which I wore over the compression garment and the minute I put them on, I felt so much better. I had to wear those for a number of weeks till I healed and then I switched to proper prostheses until I had my reconstruction. For me the fact that I could look normal helped me. But I do read of many women who are very happy to be flat chested - so just feel free to be however you wish to be. 

It also helped me to speak to women who had been through it - and seeing them live normal healthy and fulfilling lives gave me a lot of strength.

Listen to yourself - follow your instincts. They will guide you to what you need to get courage.  Somewhere deep down we know what it is we need to comfort ourselves. If you find that, you will find the way to overcome your fears.

I hope this helps. Feel free to ask anything you want.

A bmx is a huge decision but you are strong and healthy and don't have to have chemo and radiation after. Tips for after surgery--sleep in a recliner, get front close sports bra-no wires they're cheap at Walmart. Get a plastic step stool like 2 steps for the bathtub with a shower hose so you can sit and wash. The drains are a pain but I just pinned them to the bra and put little socks on them so they didn't stick to me! I did not like the plastic touching my skin. Take everything from your hospital room -- all the supplies for post care or washing etc that they have, the rinse-less soap was very nice! Ask exactly what you should do with your incisions. Mine got a little yucky and just had to deal with that... I too did not miss much work but work from home and just told myself I was not going to feel sorry for myself and had to pay the bills.. Prepare food or at least have a plan for what you and your family will want to eat. You're not going to want to go to the store. Get, or make, thank you notes so you don't have to after. Think about what you do everyday and know you'll have limited use of your arms- like lifting things, raising your arms as high as you could, which is temporary. You have to recoop-allow yourself to. Take the pain meds!! Get them before and get stool softner I didn't take the softener before and it was not fun. I will try to post more as I think of it. Keep a journal. I'm sending you positive healing thoughts!