Thank you for sharing that. I loved that article.

I've been reading many articles denouncing the battle words. The implication being, you didn't "fight" hard enough. You weren't strong enough. You weren't positive enough. I'm definitely not in agreement with that train of thought.

Before being diagnosed with BC, I struggled with RA for 32 years. Thirteen years ago, I contracted flesh eating bacteria and almost lost my life. Three years ago, I was diagnosed with triple negative and her2 breast cancer, I started a blog called beppysfight. This month I've been diagnosed with TN metastatic BC - mets to lung.

In my eyes, living a good life with pain has been a battle for me. The word "fight" for me has always pertained to my fight between my mind and body. I'm constantly fighting the crazy thoughts of progression that creep into my mind. At times, I fight with my mind to get out of bed and get my body moving. The conversation between my mind and body is frequently confrontational. I fight daily to find something beautiful and positive in the world. I fight daily to be grateful for all the extra time I've been given. I fight daily to chose love and kindness over bitterness. Some days I'm successful, some days not so much. I am human after-all.

As it pertains to my life, I don't feel like I'm battling cancer. Although I must admit, I wouldn't mind hitting it with a big stick and smashing it into oblivion. I'm fighting the disagreement with my body and mind. My mind wants to run, dance and sing at times. Unfortunately, my body won't co-cooperate. At other times my mind wants to shut down, and my body is a willing participant. That is my best description of the battle or fight for me. Maybe when my mind and body reconcile the fight will be over. Does that mean I've lost my battle or fight to cancer? In my mind, no.

Sorry for the rambling. I just wanted to point out it's not always about the disease for me. It's about reconciling the mind with the body. Something I freely admit has been a struggle, fight, conflict or battle for me.

very much.

It really touched on a lot of how I feel about the whole battle terminology, which is to say I loathe the statement "She lost her battle with cancer". Loathe.

Mrs. M, too funny !

I have been writing my obit in my head for the last few weeks. Dx stage 4 a few months ago.

I want mine to state I died of Metatastic Lobular BC. No battle, no warrior analogies. Just the simple facts.

Not sure but I never missed a beat . I keep plugging a long pain what pain. Both breast gone no pain meds afterwards 7 days from work and back I went. Yeah I was stupid.

The only thing that brothered me and made me run is when my boxer looked at me like a new toy ,six hanging drains. He just didnt get it he had to sit on my lap.

Now what is pissing me off is the wait game. Lets see what happens . Just one more month on a drug that has'nt been out long enough to know long term effects or what happens to the cancer, if you can no longer take it. What then. How does it effect the response to other meds given.

Why are some taking duel or three treatments and others are not. Why some standerdized care but just some. Why are we started with certain drugs first.

Why not start off with the good stuff first . Whats the methodology in cancer. String it along and watch it grow.

Study the cancer as a group yes but also individually .

Seriously to much wishy washy BS for my standards and that is what matters. Its not the story after the fact but the team and people here that have fought tooth and nail to keep our asses alive. Crying does not help anymore tears can barely fall from my eyes. Except to hear how someone anyone is still losing their lifes to cancer.

4x cancer fighter yeah a stage 1 with skin mets. Hmmm

Fight on all. Show those teeth

Nbnotes, you are more than welcome to use the same or similar wording.

When the phrase "lost the battle" is used, it sounds like every day dealing with cancer was a struggle, a fight, and that in the end, the cancer won. That's not at all how I would describe my life since being diagnosed stage iv. Yes, of course there are challenges, however, I chose to see myself as living with the disease, not dying from it. The obituary wording might help inspire others and it sounds much more victorious.

Here are my random thoughts. My immune system is probably fighting cancer cells along with other invaders in my body like infections, illnesses, whatever. I have no hand in that process. I am not participating in any battles. It just happens. Cancer is in my body, but it is not in my soul, my emotions, my very being. I continue to live my life, enjoying the good times and suffering through the bad ones. I continue to love, to play, to dream, to share, to travel, to live my life the best way I can. In the end, my body will certainly die, but I hope that bits and pieces of my ideas and love and dreams will live on through those whose lives I have touched. My belief is that cancer will not win a battle or anything else.. Why? Because when I die, whatever the cause, all those nasty cancer cells will die right along with me. There is no victory in that. TAKE THAT, cancer!

Lynne

Sorry about the rant. I totally am confused and dumb founded by it all sometimes.

Im always trying to hang out here or there. I just started the ibrance and falosadex. I do not know why Im not responding to other treatment. My cancer changes back and forth . Skin mets . Now nodes on the opposite side.

But anyways Thank you all for being cool,

classy , informative and caring. The list can go on and on add to it and pass it on . Big hugs

Mrs. M, Thank you for your kind words. I liked your obits! The bus obit gave me a good chuckle.

Bestbird, I appreciate the encouragement. Thank you so much for your wonderful Insider's Guide. The information you've compiled is so helpful!!

Funthing, I think we deserve a few rants.

I've been living with cancer for a really long time and have never forsaken my pacifist status.

Yes, I acknowledge there's a war going on around me, have heard treatment called, "slash, burn and poison", but I don't use those metaphors for what I've chosen to help my body heal and live well.

Wellness, wholeness, healing, living are my guide words.

The closest I come to battle is the warrior pose in yoga - I set my focus and gather strength from earth and heaven to claim my place in the family of humanity, of all life.

There are many ways to "do" cancer. I feel fortunate to have chosen the metaphors that work best for me. And to have healing artists who've helped me achieve wellness, wholeness, healing and a good long life, even while living with cancer. Even while living with a dying body.

Just a thought from another one living outside the dominant paradigm.

Be well, my friends, Stephanie

Hi Stephanie,

I had to shed some light on an internet kitty pic this morning and now I'm going to open my eyes to the way I speak about cancer. I currently am at war but will open to your picture of this.

Thank you so much for sharing with a newbie like me, your posts have been warm and comforting.

cb

Damn, I love that Uppity Blues Woman lyric!

Love it. Thanks for the laugh.

I want my obit to say "GG lived well, in spite of MBC"