Incredible Funk

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jlstacey
jlstacey Member Posts: 277
edited March 2016 in Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts

I'm feeling pretty low right now. I feel fat and ugly and can't exercise because I'm recovering from DIEP flap. My hair looks goofy- it came in curly which I love but it's at that Bozo the clown stage!

My husband and I have had some issues and I feel like I'm being too needy- he can be kind of emotionally distant sometimes.

And then there's my brain. Chemo has totally screwed it up. I feel like o might have early onset Alzheimer's. It scares the heck out of me. I want to go back to work but I feel overwhelmed and incapable.

So I should probably go to my therapist, but honestly I'm sick of doctors.

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  • mkinoly
    mkinoly Member Posts: 86
    edited March 2016

    I noticed there weren't any responses to your post, so I wanted to chime in and say I hope things have improved since your post. Some days are just so hard... and when those days add up it feels impossible. Did you decide to see your therapist? I know, who wants another doctor appointment, right? I keep telling myself to go to therapy but the good days make me think I can handle it all without that.

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  • jlstacey
    jlstacey Member Posts: 277
    edited March 2016

    You've hit the nail on the head. I know I'm more anxious, I'm just hoping I can handle it "on my own". I'm on meds already. I just don't get why I'm anxious. On that note, I think I will make appointment. I know my self-confidence and self-worth have plummeted. How about you?

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  • Meadow
    Meadow Member Posts: 2,007
    edited March 2016

    Jlstacey, I hope you are feeling better. I do not know if you have tried some kind of anti depressant or seratonin lifter, like lexapro or something, but I do know they help sooo much. It is so very normal and common to feel like you are after surgery, after everyhting you have been through. Does your Oncology Center have any BC support groups? Often there is one, as we need support through every stage of treatment and recovery. Please do not despair....you will feel better! You will look more like yourself! You will get to the other side of recovery! Just take it one day, one day. Please check in soon so we can give you a cyber hug, and know we really care about you. You can do this, just hang on.

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  • ElaineTherese
    ElaineTherese Member Posts: 3,328
    edited March 2016

    Jlstacey,

    I had my worst days just after a surgery, too. Like Meadow, I'm a fan of "Better living through chemistry." I'm on Celexa for moodiness, and take Ativan for those nights when it's hard to sleep.

    While I know you say that you feel incapable of going back to work, I've found work to be therapeutic. At least it keeps my mind off freakin' cancer. My department was kind and let me get back into the groove at my own pace. Hope you feel better soon!

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