Starting Chemo March 2015

here is some heart food for tonight: it's Rilke's "All For The Sake Of A Poem"

For the sake of a single poem, you must see many cities, many people and Things, you must understand animals, must feel how birds fly, and know the gesture which small flowers make when they open in the morning.
You must be able to think back to streets in unknown neighborhoods, to unexpected encounters, and to partings you had long seen coming; to days of childhood whose mystery is still unexplained, to parents whom you had to hurt when they brought in a joy and you didn't pick it up (it was a joy meant for somebody else); to childhood illnesses that began so strangely with so many profound and difficult transformations, to days in quiet restrained rooms and to mornings by the sea, to the sea itself, to seas, but it is still not enough to be able to think of all that.

You must have memories of many nights of love, each one different from all the others, memories of women screaming in labor, and of light, pale, sleeping girls who have just given birth and are closing again. But you must also have been beside the dying, must have sat beside the dead in the room with the open windows and the scattered noises.And it is not yet enough to have memories. You must be able to forget them when they are many, and you must have the immense patience to wait until they return. For the memories themselves are not important. Only when they have changed into our very blood, into glance and gesture, and are nameless, no longer to be distinguished from ourselves only then can it happen that in some very rare hour the first word of a poem arises in their midst and goes forth from them.

hugs and love to all

beautiful Katy..hugs and love back to you:)

Happy Birthday Sloth! Hoping you have a great day today and wonderful year ahead full of good times!

PB

sloth - hope this is a year of awesomeness for you! Happy Birthday!

Thanks for all of your good wishes. I am home. Surgery seemed to go fine. I feel ok. A little woozy, but I can deal w woozy. Now we wait for the path report. Alan is being wonderful. He took me, waited, now he is at the store figuring out lunch and dinner. He will stay until my next babysitter comes and feed us all. I'm so lucky in so many ways.

I was having a really hard time in the pre-op area. Kept thinking how the last time I was there I had cancer & woke up w/o my left boob. But I knew you were all there w/ me, hanging in my pocket.

Glad you're through it, Eileen.

Thanks for keeping us in the loop, Eileen. Get your rest.

Happy birthday, Linda!

Theresa, no news on our MRI yet?

Eileen, wishing you speedy healing and clear pathology.

T, hoping you get the results soon and that it is all good news.

So glad you had a nice birthday Linda! I always love your witty posts!!!

Theresa and Eileen-thinking of you and hoping for positive test results.

My port is scheduled to come out Tues. Almost didn't happen. I called to see if I could have the EKG done same day same location...they didn't even have me on the schedule! I had to leave work and camp out in BS office until the called and got it on the books. Took two hours and a lot of stress out of my work day. I'm feeling really sad and easily angered lately. I'm not sure why. I should be thrilled this is coming to an end so to speak. Trying to just keep breathing and not isolating like I tend to do.

It's snowing here like crazy but not sticking to the roads thank goodness. Hope everyone is having a safe and happy Saturday!

Diane- I'm so glad you fought to get it out soon. It's not unusual I've noticed to have ambiguous feelings after the end of tx.

I still do.

Sendings hugs. Please stay connected.

Thinking of you Amber and wishing you healing and hope. Also, that your pain gets taken seriously and solution found soon.

Looking forward to spring. Would send you flowers if I could.

For Phaila and anyone else who wanders by, things I wish the nurses at the infusion center had reminded me to do to avoid side effects.

To help avoid neuropathy from the taxotere: Ice hands and feet during infusions. Avoid exposure to heat for a few days after, no hot showers, baths or doing dishes for a couple of days.

H2 blockers, like zantac are associated with hand/foot syndrome. Ask your MO if you can switch to a PPI such as Prilosec until you're done with treatment, though you don't want to be on PPIs for long, they sure did help. Also tums and rolaids. tums better when you've got diarrhea and rolaids better when you're constipated.

To avoid bladder problems from cytoxan: drink lots of water during and after infusions.

Not sure why this was not routine advice. When you're nervous and scared it's hard to remember how to take care of yourself!

And almost everyone here would say stock up the coconut oil. Thanks to everyone here for their support and advice. And especially love to Sharon for starting this thread.

Thinking of you as you wait for results, Theresa and Eileen! I have a mammo tomorrow.

I have a 3-month MO appointment in a week and a half. Fortunately, a very special bracelet just arrived! Thanks, Sue!

ask me how pissed off I am that I got no call today about my breast MRI. Don't doctors understand waiting is torture?