Thought I

Options
butterflykdh
butterflykdh Member Posts: 20
edited March 2016 in Mental Health: Because Cancer Doesn't Just Affect Your Breasts

Thought all I had to deal,with was reconstruction & those pesky follow ups for 5 yrs that they insist even if they think there is no chance of recurrence or spreading. Then issues started beginning my one month post chemo check up & now I've been in the ER twice since then. My pulse is too fast & no one knows why & Im always short of breath. And there's a possibility of cancer in both my lungs. I tried to get through it before with a sort of twisted humor but they have said it could be yrs before we are sure of what the nodes in my lungs are. And that I'd need scans every 3 months until it's figured out. And I am supposed to stay calm so I don't make the fast pulse even worse. Thank God for Xanax or I couldn't manage it . I can't seem to use my sense of humor now & I feel like I'm falling apart.

· Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Comments

  • farmerlucy
    farmerlucy Member Posts: 3,985
    edited March 2016

    Sorry Kat. :( Crossing my finger and toes it is not mets. About two month post dx I was having trouble breathing and catching my breath. I went to the ER and just being there calmed me down. They said I was dehydrated, but I think I was having panic attacks and did not know what they were. Later my PCP put me on Xanax but also ordered a CT scan of my lungs. I had fluid surrounding them that he surmised was from the mx and recon and thought it would go away on it own. It did. I think I was feeling that on top of being flat out crazy scared out of my mind. No fun. No fun at all.

    Please keep in touch and let us know how you are doing. Gentle hug.
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • butterflykdh
    butterflykdh Member Posts: 20
    edited March 2016

    thank you. They did a ct chest scan, a chest x Ray &'a bunch of blood tests. Ruled out blood clots, dehydration (which is what I had thought it might be because I've always dehydrated easily ) & fluid around the heart. But found in each lung a 6 mm node & also that my left lung was under inflating . Wasn't prepared for issues really. I did really well through chemo & surgery despite medical issues that worried my doctors. Cardio dr is doing testing but thinks the pulse is from all the steroid changes when I stopped chemo. But we will see. She's testing all possibilities so I don't have to stress over that part at least. I just so badly wanted to put cancer behind me & now I can't stop thinking of it. If not for Xanax I'd seriously be bouncing of the walls. And I feel so depressed . I hate not knowing anything & having it over my head for who knows how long now

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • farmerlucy
    farmerlucy Member Posts: 3,985
    edited March 2016

    Breast Cancer the gift that keeps on giving. Hang in there.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • butterflykdh
    butterflykdh Member Posts: 20
    edited March 2016
    image
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • farmerlucy
    farmerlucy Member Posts: 3,985
    edited March 2016

    Sounds like progress to me. Sometimes it is one step forward one step back. I'm so glad you have such excellent resources. My counselor used to say to me every week - "You know how long it will take for you to feel better?" "As long as it takes."

    The most troublesome thing was my inability to concentrate, my inability to trust the fact that I could handle things as they came up andnot become a noodle. During this time I misplaced my credit card. I was sobbing inconsolably on the floor because I was so upset.

    You'll get there and you'll be stronger for having worked through the issues. Thanks so much for sharing your struggle. I know there are others out there who are helped by your story.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • butterflykdh
    butterflykdh Member Posts: 20
    edited March 2016

    thanks, the support helps a lot. I can't seem to relate to anyone except my pink sisters & medical people these days...

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Categories