Starting Chemo in October 2015

Thankfully, my last on-site at work improved and I left early to head to Colorado and meet a dear friend for sushi and crashed at her house. Yay! I spent yesterday running errands in SW Colorado, including picking up more Latisse for my brows, then drove to Santa Fe to unload a truck full of stuff for my upcoming 6 weeks there for radiation, and then dropped back down to Albuquerque for a concert with friends. Saw my favorite, March 4th Marching Band (check them out on-line...a modern, sexy marching band) My legs weren't too swollen so I was able to dance a lot. So much fun!! Was hard to be up until midnight though...I started yawning at 9. And...I did all that - dinner out, running errands, concert out - rocking the bald.

Amy - I'm on the winter rads board too now, but wow!! stuff posts so fast there....it is hard to keep up. Soooooo many people on it. When are you starting radiation? I start on Monday 29th. Sorry you were down yesterday. I'm having a lot of that too lately, so up and down. Hooray for your brow stubble though! Healing and progress!! I hope I get some brow growth soon. I have about 12 individual random hairs left on each eyebrow (which may still fall out) and I'm enhancing them lightly a little with liner, but I don't wear make-up otherwise. Started using Latisse on them a couple of weeks ago but I forget 1/2 the nights.

MDW - that sounds like such a fantastic celebration with your spouse! Yay you!! So wonderful to be outside and enjoy wine and yummy lunch together. I hope you are able to squeeze in a few more simple pleasures before your surgery too.

Working from home today - lots of conference calls, then off tomorrow for PT and rads sim and tattoing....and then dinner out. Planning to take the dogs for a run during lunch today if my leg swelling stays low and when the temp is above 40...that might mean wearing shorts if it isn't windy!

- xo

Kimmer: Napa and Sonoma are both incredibly nice places to visit. Just driving through the vineyards on Tuesday was stunning. The fields are awash in gold and green. I didn't want to come home.

igay1ord: YAY for getting your final chemo infusion done! I'm so glad--that was a long wait for you, and how maddening to be so close to the finish line and then have to stop. I wish you all the best with transitioning to Herceptin and rads. Let us know how the Herceptin-only infusions go. I'll be starting those, too, after surgery. It'll be nice to go for an infusion and not have it turn into an all-day affair--or have to battle the full array of wicked SEs. Your grocery store adventure made me smile. Isn't it nice when life hands you a fun little surprise--like free wine tastings at the market? Good for you and your hubby for wisely not letting that opportunity pass!

Andra: WOW! You've been busy! My hat (or scarf or beanie) is off to you for getting so much done--the fun stuff and the chores--while rocking your baldness! I love your moxie. ;-) I looked up March 4th Marching Band--wow, they look amazing and must be wild to see live! They remind me of a marching band I used to see at Burning Man called the Extra Action Marching Band. Who'd have thunk that melding the traditional marching band with sexy/playfulness would work so well? ;-) I hope your planned run today was a pleasant one and that your legs cooperated.

Good luck to everyone who's transitioned to, or will shortly be transitioning to, rads. I'm curious to hear how that's going for folks who are already doing it? How are you holding up? I've heard it can bring on a lot of fatigue, but I'm hoping there aren't too many SE's. I'm curious about duration--how long is a typical session of radiation?

I'm starting to put together my hospital kit for next week. I didn't think I was too nervous, but the last couple of nights, I've been unable to fall asleep without taking Ativan, so I guess it's kind of bubbling around in my brain. Also my mom and dad are arriving on Tuesday next week, and we're scrambling to get ready for company, so that's got me wound up. We had just moved into this house a couple of months before my diagnosis last year and so much stuff just never got done. We're cleaning up the yard, getting stuff up on the walls, and we *finally* got a guest bed into the room that's been functioning as my home office. Progress!

Hope everyone has a beautiful day!

So glad to hear everyone is doing fairly well, considering. When I was waiting to get my labs yesterday before chemo, a tech called an older man back and as he was going back I heard her ask him, How are you today? And he replied, "Well, I have cancer, other than that ok I guess. " My husband and I got a good laugh out of his response. It's so often what many of us want to say.

I have my final chemo in 6 days, then we leave for Florida the next day. I'm wondering when this dead tired feeling will start to go away. Did anyone else have weekly taxol?

MDW, I have had that question on some paperwork as well. I don't know how to answer that anymore! Are we considered to be in poor health?

Hi all,

sorry I have been absent for a while. Before surgery I had a severe case of the nerves. I kept on reading here but couldn't muster the concentration to add. Now I'm bouncing back to normal fast. Hey, I've been sleeping for whole nights again since I was allowed to go home, even with drains.

Pain from surgery on tuesday was negligible from the minute I woke up in the recovery room and I could move pretty well right from the start, just the drains on the left, the tumor side gave me trouble. (I had both breasts removed without reconstruction since the right one showed calcifications already and I wasn't inclined to wait what my body would make of this. And I didn't really care about being lopsided anyway.) One drain each side was removed on friday, the other two on saturday. Hurt pretty bad for those on the left side, but thankfully it was done in seconds. I could sleep on my side(s) once the drains where gone!

Hope this could help you from some of that nervous anticipation, MDW. It really isn't worth getting worked up about, although I did that myself. And, looking at how I am able to sleep now it must have been a big relief to get rid of whatever still was there to be rid of.

So there, all good on this side of the Atlantic so far. I guess results from pathology might be in tuesday.

So, while I didn't write: I was thrilled that Kimmer33 got her house sold before it even was on the market and so was spared a lot of keeping it showcase tidy and strangers peering into her life again and again. Thanks for keeping us posted about what radiation is like for you. If I have to do it, I'll feel a bit more reassured.

ncsue and Autumn121: Did those rashed clear up? It would be an absolute nuisance to experience those again for the last rounds of taxol.

Durhamgirl: I totally get you. Sometimes having to go through all of this is just too much. We all are pretty compliant, stick to our therapies, try to stay strong and keep it together, but sometimes it takes just one more tiny irritation, thoughless comment or harsh word to have us loose it. Hang in there.

Andraxo: Totally with you on the part where you dig your teeth in to retain some of what makes your life worth living. How can they expect us to just keep sitting still like hens in a coop to make life easy for them? To keep moving is to keep sanity, most of all now, where the mot intense part of therapy is over and the enormity of what has happened starts creeping in. And you are still impressively strong, even if trying to run is rustrating. (I'll report what it's like for me once a dare try again)

Does the Lasix work for you? I tried some tea that was supposed to help flush out water. It did, but it just dehydrated me and gave me a headache while my legs were entirely unimpressed. Now, four weeks after last infusion, I see some progress, my legs are getting a bit more shapely.

igay1ord: I was wondering what herceptin by itself would be like. I guess I'll experience it myself next week. About that weight issue: Seems nobody does get it what it's like if cancer takes something from you you have worked hard for. Weight, fitness - like we'd get it back snipping with our fingers once therapy is done. I'm happy that last infusion could be done and you can start to envision a life that will take you where you want to go.

AmyBeader: Great to hear from you again! How are those fingers, are you getting rid of those pesky neuropathy effects? I'd so love to read you are able to make beads again.

homeschool4us: You probably started to count the days until you're off to Florida. I dread that "How are you"-question because I do not know why they even ask. Do they want to know how I am healthwise apart from cancer or do they want to know how I'm holding up emotionally? Is it just for conversation? When my oncologist asked, I just answered that he should be the one to tell me since he had all the results from scans and bloodwork.

Have a nice weekend all!

Jedrik - so glad your surgery is behind you now and you could move well after! I found the drains annoying and was thrilled when they came out.

Amy - Latisse is a prescription topical solution that helps lashes grow. not covered by insurance, though I've read of a few people on BCO who did get it covered after fighting hard because chemo made their lashes fall out. I'm using it on my brows, though forgot the past 3 nights, ugh! Usually aesthetic places carry it - I got mine from a GYN doc who now runs a practice that does aesthetic work (injections, laser hair removal, skin treatments etc). So sorry about the neuropathy. I know how awful it is. Be very careful in the kitchen...heat, sharp objects etc. The waiting game sucks. I postponed carpal tunnel surgery for mastectomy, but have to get it done soon....The tips of my right index and thumb are numb.

I think I may have turned the corner on my leg edema on Friday. I ran 8.5 miles yesterday at about a minute per mile faster than any run I've done in the past 2 months! Felt sick last night and I'm sore today, but that is reasonable. I've been avoiding standing and that has helped my edema. Maybe I'll start to get better now as I approach 4 weeks after last chemo.

Tomorrow is first radiation tx. Booooo.

This board is so much more manageable than the rads board...I just can't seem to keep up on that one, but I'm trying.

Feels like spring here - temps in the 60s. Rocking the bald as best I can outdoors in public. Seems that many women in their 20s seem to stare or seem stunned. No one else even does a double take...which is so nice.

- Andra xo

Amy, using Kiss My Face lotion morning and night. So far, so good

Hi All,

Andra, thanks for info on the Lasix. Looks like it's a good thing the problem resolves itself. And those gorgeous pics! You really rock this unusual art. There'll be even more stunned people staring at you, and rightly so, it's just awesome.

AmyBeader: I'm sorry to read that there isn't sufficient improvement concerning neuropathy, especially when it keeps you from doing the things you love and need to do to stay in tune with yourself. Did you MO suggest supplements to maybe speed up nerve regeneration? Not sure, but vitamine b compound and glutamine come to mind. It might be worth asking about them.

homeschool4us: My oncologist said the effects from taxane-treatments might get worse for about a month after last infusion. That was pretty much spot on for me, but then february is a short month. How are you feeling now? Are you all packed for the holiday?

Me? I've had a bad day. My onc "discovered" that 2% HR positiveness isn't negligible as he said initially, but needs to be treated with years of chemical castration as per guidline. And apart from that MX and pCR are nowhere near enough, RTX is recommended, too. That apart from 12 more 3-weekly Herceptin infusions. Not sure what I'll do.

Andra....Love it! And love the design!

I have a question...did anyone else ever have any issues with cramping of your hands and feet? I'm having major issues in the last day or so with my feet cramping so bad, they actually distort and hurt! My hands started just today. I'm not sure how to handle this!

Thanks everyone! Homeschool - it took about an hour and a half.

Hooray for Homeschool's last chemo! and, so sweet to finish it off with a Florida trip...heck yes!

MDW - Hope all goes well today for surgery!

- Andra xo

Hi everyone!

My parents came into town yesterday to help us out per tomorrow's surgery, so I've been running around like crazy for the last week or so. Hadn't had a chance to check in here for a bit, and it's nice to see so many posts!

Andra: you look incredible!!! I just showed my mom and dad the pics of your henna tat and we all ooh'ed and aah'ed over them. You make bald look super cool. I was also so happy to read that you had such a good run, despite still battling the edema in your legs. My leg edema seems to be letting up a bit, though my legs are still quite stiff and a bit sore.

Jedrik: I was so happy to hear that you came through surgery so well. I totally understand the pre-surgery nerves and how those affect sleep. I've been relying on Ativan a bit recently. Not every night, but some nights. But reading about your surgical experience and how you took it in stride was very heartening and calmed me down a bit. I'm having a tissue expander implanted tomorrow, in addition to the mastectomy/lymphectomy, and the plastic surgeon's nurse said that that can cause some additional discomfort. But I'm ready to get this over with.

I was curious about what you said your MO told you. I'm also positive for HER2 (I assume that's what HR meant in your post), and I'm not sure, but I think I was 3%. My own MO has NOT indicated that I will need to continue with anything beyond continuing Herceptin for the full year following diagnosis. I'm wondering about what you said regarding "chemical castration". Does that mean long-term hormonal therapy of some sort? I assume RTX means you will be having radiation. I was told to expect that as well, despite having a mastectomy instead of a lumpectomy.

AmyBeader: I'm really sorry that the neuropathy continues to be a problem for you! It's scary to think of cutting oneself and not being able to tell right away where you've been injured. I've also experienced that some side effects have been very stubborn about going away after final chemo, and it's aggravating. I really hope you start to get sensation back soon. I also wish you the best of luck today with your first radiation treatment!

igay1ord: I have also had occasional bad cramping in my hands--they'd cramp into weird positions until I massaged them out, but it's letting up now, following the end of chemo.

As for me, I'm anxiously awaiting a call from the hospital today to give me my final schedule and instructions for tomorrow's surgery. Originally it was set up for about 1 pm, but that was just tentative. Until I get the final schedule, I don't even know if we're going to head down to Palo Alto tonight and sleep over at a friend's house, or just drive down tomorrow. My parents are here and I'm getting them oriented to things so that they can stay with my son. He's happy to have a couple new audience members and has been talking their ears off about Lego, school, sports, and whatever else pops into his head.

Thank you to everyone for the best wishes about surgery! If I don't check in again before it happens, I wish everyone a great rest of the week.

xoxo Meara

I'm done with chemo! It's a weird feeling.

yay homeschool!!!

Yay. Homeschool! Congratulations. It definitely din't sink in for me for awhile, either, that it was really over. Right after infusion, it felt like...well, another infusion. I wish you all the best in getting through this last round without a lot of SEs.

Andra: I love the henna tat even in its lighter, more subtle form. It's a gorgeous design!

I'm home from surgery as of early this afternoon. Although I'd never want to stay in a hospital longer than necessary, I have to say, it feels like 23 hours for a mastectomy and tissue expander insertion is a bit fast. But so far, everything seems to be going all right, and my surgeons told me all went beautifully. There was another woman in the bed next to mine in the Ambulatory Surgical Center who had also had a mastectomy and expanders, and she seemed to be having a rougher time than me, pain-wise, so I'm grateful that I don't have crazy amounts of discomfort. It's mostly okay except for when I'm trying to lift myself up to sit or walk. Even trying not to involve my left side too much, I still feel it over there.

I haven't really taken a full look at my left side, other than peeking down there when the doctors and nurses came by to take a look. Dealing with these drains is a pain, but I'm sure it will be old hat in a day or two. I'll have them in until my return visit on the 14th, so I'd better get used to them. ;-)

They didn't give me any PT instructions before I was discharged. My surgeon just told me to try to move as much as possible/comfortable, to reduce edema.

Off to do some more healing now.

Chiming in with healing thoughts for you MDW!!