STEAM ROOM FOR ANGER

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  • Deaconlady
    Deaconlady Member Posts: 158
    edited February 2016

    I went in yesterday for my first chemo. I was told about 4 hours give or take. 6 and a half hours later I left. My doctor forgot to send the orders for my chemo to he pharmacy. I just had to laugh...

  • whoknows
    whoknows Member Posts: 24
    edited February 2016

    Again, I'm not alone. Thank you for sharing.

    I finally calmed down and made an appointment with the surgeon that the PCP referred me to for a second opinion. Outside of this health care group.

    It occurred to me that in 2014, when I searched out the best surgeon in town, I chose her because of her position on lumpectomies and taking an extra surgical margin. This time I'm having a mastectomy. She may not be the best surgeon in town for that and I may be going though support staff hell for no reason.

    Just Jean, My PCP has me coming in once a month whether I like it or not, until further notice. You might just schedule yourself that way for awhile. After the first month, all of my appointments seem to be booked far enough in advance to be at my convenience.

    MoreShoes: I take these stupid anti-anxiety medications so I can remain calm with the staff. Period. I don't have that sort of patience.

    Deacon Lady, Poor thing. You would think someone might have figured it out and called over to the pharmacy during the first hour you waited. That's sort of what happened here. A two week delay in ordering the CT scan is causing issues now, three weeks later. I caught on at the end of week 2 and pushed it to happen.

    I really wonder if they have enough patients to be this rude/ineffective. I know this is expensive medical care and I can shop elsewhere. Do they not need the business? I have no idea how much my upcoming necessary chemotherapy costs, but there are 5 or 6 excellent options in the greater Phoenix Metro area outside of this medical group. Surgery is expensive too and if I leave this doctor because of her rude staff, the associated hospital is going to miss out on that money too.

    I'm ranting on again.

    Thank you for being here today and for sharing, I don't feel so alone.

    cb

  • whoknows
    whoknows Member Posts: 24
    edited February 2016

    DeaconLady,

    I can only imagine the stress of the day. I admire you for being able to laugh. You must have a wonderful support system around you. I hope all goes better for you hereafter.

    cb

  • Janett2014
    Janett2014 Member Posts: 3,833
    edited February 2016

    cb1504,

    What kind of snide remarks do the surgeon's office support staff make? That's awful by the way.



  • whoknows
    whoknows Member Posts: 24
    edited February 2016

    MOTHER WUCKIN BLOODY H3LL!

    Now I get a voicemail reminder? I'm over being upset and I'm getting I'm getting pi$ed!

    • Snide remarks from my first 2016 visit: "Oh yeah, we have a file on you, you know." Referencing 2014 when I was surgeon shopping and found she was not on my insurance.
    • When I rescheduled last Friday due to their mistake: They called to see when my CT scan was scheduled, as I was on the the drive to the CT appointment and clearly she had that tone going on in her voice.
    • Today: I've had 3 different "reminders" that I have an appointment on Friday. I always ignore the first, normal one. I did respond immediately (10:54 am) to the 2nd - out of the ordinary reminder to both the doctor and her PA. And just now the 3rd reminder is just pi$ing me off!

    Thank God for Xanax because I am gonna really need it on Friday.

    You know what? Doctor will be sure to hear by name, about the 2 women in her office that screwed up my CT scan and caused this delay. AFTER we discuss my CT scan and I get a copy on disk to take to the new surgeon.

    I was gonna let it slide - but they're making this all about me when they screwed up.

    My appointment's not until Friday, I wonder how many "reminders" I'll get tomorrow?

    What is my crime that warrants all these reminders? I rescheduled my office visit for last Friday.

    Because the soonest I could get the CT scan done was last Friday due to her office not sending the referral in a more timely fashion.

    Why visit the surgeon without the test results we were to discuss?

    I even got a call late Thursday from the CT scan girl to try to reschedule because they still didn't have approval from insurance. She had to call insurance Friday morning so they could see me Friday noon.

    I have otherwise been early to every appointment, rescheduled NOTHING and been WUCKING CHEERFULLY ignoring their attitude at every meeting.

  • JJOntario
    JJOntario Member Posts: 356
    edited February 2016

    Anger is finding out by ACCIDENT in September by the radiologist that I had another area to be biopsied that wasn't done as it was supposed to during my lx. Biopsy was finally done last week. Results should be in tomorrow...it's been a week of hell playing the waiting game for something that should have been done last year!!! Like seriously WTF? How did all my DRs not notice it wasn't done...???? How did nobody tell me? Even if this nothing...the mental wreck and the pain of doing a stereotactic biopsy on a tight radiated breast (with implants) is just not even funny. Like F#%K!!!!

  • whoknows
    whoknows Member Posts: 24
    edited February 2016

    I know JJ,

    2014 the machine broke after 1 needle in the healthy breast and the stereoscopic procedure ended. Surgeon operated anyway and here I am 18 months later with a new lump in the same spot as the old lump.

    I am right there with you sister, but the attorney told me there was no way to prove damage, nothing to sue about.

    Some Miss Thing told me the other day that I was coming from a place of anger because I'm angry that I have cancer. Miss Thing - do not anger me and I will not be coming from a place of anger.

    cb

  • whoknows
    whoknows Member Posts: 24
    edited February 2016

    But JJ,

    The attorney also mentioned that the statute of limitations here in AZ for this sort of thing is 2 years from discovery. He urged me to get another legal opinion. Don't let my experience influence your actions.

    cb

  • april485
    april485 Member Posts: 3,257
    edited February 2016

    JustJean, I think it is inexcusable that your doctor does not see you immediately (the same day or early the next) when you have stage IV cancer for pete's sake!! My PCP puts aside a few appointments each day for last minute sick folks. She will ALWAYS squeeze me in and also did so way before I had any breast cancer issues. That just stinks on every level and smacks of insurance issues to me, but since you are in Canada, I don't know how your system works. Hugs either way. You deserve better than a clinic for whatever illness you are experiencing. ((((Jean))))

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 19,603
    edited February 2016

    Cb Hmm on the lawyer.............Look up Demand letter. You likely could put it together yourself. Aske for a letter in return stating the steps they have taken to clean that from your record i.e every note has to be looked at nurse and docs, History, treatment plan. Maybe someone else can think og anything else.

    Meow, it worked :)

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 19,603
    edited February 2016

    Cb what happened. I went to post to you and all your posts were there. Now they are all gone? What up girlfriend?

  • JustJean
    JustJean Member Posts: 327
    edited February 2016

    Aw, thanks April!


    I am not in Canada NE Ohio here.


    My old PCP always had appointment slots open each day for sick patients. She's left the Cleveland Clinic and moved and I miss her SO much.


    I have an appointment with the newer PCP next week. Be assured that this WILL be a topic of conversation. I consider this as totally unacceptable! Because of this, I have been subjected to an antibiotic treatment that I am allergic to and it's been a tough few days.


    JJ



  • april485
    april485 Member Posts: 3,257
    edited February 2016

    Holy, cow, I need new glasses...LOL. I read OH as Ontario I think...LOL Either way, you should definitely speak to the clinic about this issue. Let us know how it goes.

  • Janel15
    Janel15 Member Posts: 5
    edited February 2016

    I am sick and tired of hearing that I should be rejoicing now that chemo and surgeries are over and I am cancer free. I have pretend boobs! I am moody and damn it! I don't care. I don't feel thankful. I feel robbed. I feel that a year of my life is gone and not coming back.

    I wish I could be grateful that I am alive and well again but I don't. I miss feeling strong and whole. Any ideas on how to move on?

  • pajim
    pajim Member Posts: 2,785
    edited February 2016

    Janel, you are in a tough spot. Your feelings are entirely valid. You are also not alone.

    Many women feel worse after the treatment ends because up until now you've been concentrating on the treatments. Now that those are over life starts anew. It's almost like after the funeral. Everyone goes home and now you have to figure out what you want your life to be.

    My cancer center runs support groups for women who are just finished treatment. Does yours have one? There might be some good advice on the main bc.org site, or other sites. You should reach out for support.

  • MeToo14
    MeToo14 Member Posts: 493
    edited February 2016

    Janel15 you have every right to feel that way. You are not alone in this. Up until recently I too was consumed with those feelings and I was depressed too. There is a thread call "why was I stronger during treatment". I found it very helpful. Everyone there is going through or has gone through what you experiencing. Take care.

  • ShetlandPony
    ShetlandPony Member Posts: 4,924
    edited February 2016

    Oh my gosh, pajim. "After the funeral" is such an insightful way of describing it.

  • Jenwith4kids
    Jenwith4kids Member Posts: 635
    edited February 2016

    I will chime in here too - I just "celebrated" (not really) two years from my surgery. It took me a hell of a long time (and some rx drugs) to get where I am today. It takes a good 18-24 months after treatment is over to feel better - physically (that happens a little sooner) and mentally (seems like it took forever). When I was told that it sounded like an eternity. And you know what, it WAS an eternity. And now that I'm finally really feeling better it seems like my year of cancer was ages ago. It gets better. really, it does. BUT it sucks while you are in it.


    Hugs all around.


    Jen

  • JJOntario
    JJOntario Member Posts: 356
    edited February 2016

    The time after treatment has been the roughest by far for me....(throw in 2 additional biopsies, a move, issues with my job most likely disappearing, and now a total hysterectomy booked for April which they scared me by questioning ovarian cancer, -but appears to be just a really big fibroid.) it's been the toughest on my marriage...it's just tough all the way around. Thank God for all of you that give me hope that it does get better

  • MeToo14
    MeToo14 Member Posts: 493
    edited February 2016

    Hugs to you JJ! 🌈

  • Jumpship
    Jumpship Member Posts: 305
    edited March 2019

    Tomorrow will be my third blood draw in 4 days for the same tests because the lab is incapable of explaining the color blue to infusion. They said turquoise but really meant navy. Infusion is making lots of calls and follow ups while the lab doesn't even say sorry. It's a good thing I still have my port. My veins couldn't take it

  • april485
    april485 Member Posts: 3,257
    edited February 2016

    If one more "blame the victim" study is cited in front of my eyes this week, I am going to scream! BMI is a correlation to lymphedema? How does that make any sense at all? It has really gotten to me at this point. I have to separate myself from all of this crap about my BC and my future risk for BC is my fault for eating a steak once a while?

    Eat lettuce, stay thin and less BC risk? Umm, ok. explain all of the lovely young thin vegan women walking around without their breasts or who are losing their lives to this disease. They ate well, exercised, had their baby at the right age, breast fed, no GMO food and on and on. Yet, there they are, fighting this rotten disease. Ok off my soap box. Today it really got to me!

    BTW, the person who cited the study is a wonderful person who means very well with posting it. Just cannot look at another blame the victim study that has no really big correlation over many years with reproducible results over thousands of women/men. Small studies make me NUTS!

    Edited to add one study about this: http://www.massgeneral.org/cancer/assets/pdfs/ObesityLymphedema%20.pdf Please note the number of patients was 16! Sixteen!!

    Here is yet another that cites "however, small sample size...yada yada.." http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3971794/

  • tangandchris
    tangandchris Member Posts: 1,855
    edited February 2016

    I'm exhausted....I'm angry and I don't know which ends is up. Is this post hysterectomy or Femara or am I just finally snapping after all of this hell?? It's like 1 step forward and 3 back, I'm going along things are good and bam I'm back to emotional bleakness.

    Tired of the struggle.

  • MeToo14
    MeToo14 Member Posts: 493
    edited February 2016

    This isn't cancer related but I need to vent. Yesterday I asked for a raise. I haven't had one in 5 years and the truth is I really need to make more money. I am a very hard worker and worked the entire time I was in treatment and no one tried to help me out. I do feel like I am taken advantage of, but to be fair, I'm sure a lot of people would say that about their employer. I do know that I do many things that are not in my job description. I think I deserve a raise. My employer who can afford to up my pay, has told me that they don't believe I deserve one. They have been very generous with bonuses to their credit, and I am very grateful for that. I just feel hurt. I was made to feel like I was in the wrong for asking in the raise because of those bonuses. Am I in the wrong? Am I being selfish?

  • april485
    april485 Member Posts: 3,257
    edited February 2016

    I think you must work for the same employer I do

    Winking

    Hugs and maybe it is time for a change. Or, maybe if you clearly document all the ways in which you deserve more money and can show them in black and white why you feel you are underpaid, it might work? At least ask if you can be reviewed again in 3 months if they say no.

  • BayouBabe
    BayouBabe Member Posts: 2,221
    edited February 2016

    Do they clone evil bosses somewhere and send us all the same one?

  • sas-schatzi
    sas-schatzi Member Posts: 19,603
    edited February 2016
  • 7of9
    7of9 Member Posts: 833
    edited February 2016

    jj...I had that scare too.I had a breeze of a laparoscopic full hysterectomy. I had a damn er positive recurrence in the axilla. But hey, now there is no estrogen, the AIs work better. I Will take my calcium and exercise and now I don't ever have to worry about cervical cancer, ovarian cancer or uterine cancer.

  • Meow13
    Meow13 Member Posts: 4,859
    edited February 2018

    Blaming cancer victims on non healthy habits enrages me to no end. What a bunch of health crap.

    How do they explain all the "healthy" people that got cancer. Pinktober people should get real, we need a cure prevention/awareness is no guarantee.

  • april485
    april485 Member Posts: 3,257
    edited February 2016

    ThumbsUp

    Right on Meow!

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