January 2016 Surgeries

DecisionFreak · February 2016

When it rains it pours. My mother is still on oxygen and doctors have no diagnosis. My mother may be moved to an acute care facility located inside the hospital where she is in critical care. She may be there quite a while. I think this is the beginning of the end but nobody knows for certain.

Last night, my brother threw up non-stop for an hour. No fever but he was getting chills. I called an ambulance and sent my brother to the ER. He is diabetic so I don't mess around very long before seeking medical care for him. He is in the hospital now but doctors don't know what is wrong.

I am in my house alone unable to clean up a huge mess. Two weeks of being unable to clean and it is chaos.

I am going to hire a cleaning company to deal with it. Plastic surgeon said no housework for a month, and I cannot lean over to clean up the toilet and bathroom floor. Yuck. I am shutting the door and using the other bathroom.

Logang · February 2016

Katja23: I had reactions both times I had biopsies. We thought it was the adhesive from the steri-strips. When I had my right mastectomy I broke out all over my chest, abdomen, and right arm. It looked like a bad case of poison ivy. Turns out the adhesive wasn't the problem, chloraprep was. I broke out everywhere they cleansed me at the time of surgery! Hope your rash clears up quickly!

Melgirl · February 2016

Thanks mominator, I'll check those out. I am definitely still swollen and having spasms. I'm icing more and trying to hang in there.

edwsmom · February 2016

Hi all.

A couple of questions. I had BMX on 1/28, so it's been just a few days shy of 3 weeks since surgery. They were able to put the implants right in at the time of surgery.

For others who also had BMX;

1 - how long did it take before they cleared you to be able to drive yourself? I'm so tired of being house bound or relying on my parents to drive me places.

2 - how long until your drains came out? I have 2 drains and they have finally started to slow quite a bit, but they are still putting out about 40-50 cc's each per day. One I don't feel at all, but the one on the lymph node removal side is more sire and poking me. They are driving me crazy and I can't wait to get rid of them.

Just curious what others experienced with those two issues....Many thanks!

Kessa619 · February 2016

Hi, Edwsmom. I also went direct to implant. I had four drains. Two were out one week post BMX. The other two were out a week later. The difference may be that I did not have any lymph nodes removed. Maybe that generates more fluid build up - just guessing on that. My PS's rule was less than 30 cc of fluid for 48 hours. Hope yours slow down so you can get rid of them. i agree - and lots of ladies have also said - the drains are the worst part of recovery. I was permitted to drive a week post-BMX, but I waited 3 weeks becore going on anything more than a short trip.

Hope this helps!

Katja23 · February 2016

Logang, you wrote that you had a rash reaction to chloraprep. Would that have errupted shortly after the biopsy and surgery? My rash appeared a full 3 weeks after surgery, which seems rather late for a reaction to something applied during the surgery.

Mominator · February 2016

Hi edwsmom:

My PS's and BS's rules for driving were no drains and being able to make sharp turns without pain. My PS's rule for drains was also less than 30 cc of fluid for 48 hours.

My drains were under 30 cc and he allowed me to drive 2 weeks after BMX and 8 days after exchange. Especially after BMX I kept those first few weeks of driving to local trips.

If your drains are still putting out 40-50 cc's each day, you are still healing. Give yourself some time. I'm sorry, I missed driving myself as well.

I hope you heal quickly and can drive again soon. Take care.

Love,

Mominator

Katja23 · February 2016

Gardnergirls, Mominator, and Logang, thanks for alerting me to the fact that the rash on my lumpectomy breast, that I thought was dermatitis, could be an infection. I was thinking, no way it could be a surgery infection, but I had not realized the possibility of a skin infection (cellulitis) that could develop later if there occurs the slightest opening in the incision, which did happen as the steri-strips came off. I should have been washing it more with soap then, I guess. Although the rash did not seem significantly warm to me, my husband did notice a difference between the two breasts when he felt them.
So, I went to the primary care physician's office today (surgeon's office is close for the President's Day holiday), and even though I still had no fever, the nurse practitioner diagnosed it as cellulitis and prescribed an antibiotic.
Good, this will then be cleared up before I start radiation in 2 weeks.

Nolagirl1126 · February 2016

Katja23 - glad you had it checked out! Hope it clears up soon for you. I also have a very slight pain/ache under my shoulder blade that popped up yesterday and also, popped up after my lumpectomy in December. Strange...not really "pulled muscle" feeling, but just sore to the touch. It went away in December, and hoping it will go away now too

edwsmom · February 2016

Anyone else have depressed days every once in a while? Today is a tough day for me. Like it's all catching up to me.

I'm tired all the time, I'm sore, I want my drains taken out. I had a bilateral mastectomy and ALND (21 nodes taken out) so my left arm is sore and pretty limited. I can't drive or go off anywhere by myself.

I have a full time job. I worked through chemo treatment and everyone has been really supportive/great. There's been some stress from me putting pressure on myself to keep all the balls in the air and not letting anyone down. My surgery was just over 2 weeks ago and I've been totally off work. Basically just checking email periodically to stay in the loop so I don't fall behind. I'm planning to start transitioning back part time this coming week. Working from home. I still have drains, still on pain pills.

In my job I'm responsible for bringing in new clients. I submitted a proposal for a new account a month ago. They selected us as a finalist and asked us to come in to discuss it. Of the days they offered I picked the latest date (tomorrow). My boss and a colleague were going to go in person and I was going to dial-in by phone. But now boss just emailed me that he's stuck out of town and can't get a flight back. I really can't reschedule, so now I have to get myself together enough to go and do this pitch myself tomorrow. I'm stressed out.

In the meantime, I have a wonderful toddler. He's awesome but a real high-energy handful. I worry about going through all this around him. He definitely spends more time with Daddy lately and I feel so sad that I'm not doing as much for him or spending as much quality time with him lately. I hate it.

My parents have been here "helping" since surgery. Helping means they mostly do what they think helping is. They will play with my son, which is fine, good. Pick him up from preschool. The first day home from the hospital my Mom is asking me to plan what we should be having for dinner for the week. Before surgery I ordered a full grocery order delivered so we would be totally stocked - but come to find out that my Mom has new food restrictions and she can't eat several of the things I had planned in advance to be made. This resulted in a big, exhausting conversation about what we should have instead. Week two I did another online grocery delivery after a very tense second conversation about what we're planning to eat for the week, this time I made sure that I had things my family could/would eat AND the things she ate. Yesterday was the first time they went to the grocery store and only bought things my Mom needed.

The second day home from the hospital my Mom asks me if she can have a wrought iron bakers rack (that she gave me 8 years ago) back. I'm confused. This is the second time she's done this to me with something she's given me. Apparently, the reason this time is that she feels that she could use it in a more meaningful way than I'm currently using it. She wants it to hold towels in her master bathroom(???) I have it in my laundry room holding things I need in there.

Over the past week, my Mom has kept coming up to me to ask me to go and do some "outings" - go to the movies, to Home Goods, etc. I went to Home Goods one day and I was wiped out for the next full day. The next time she asked I said no. I think she's frustrated with me and bored because I stay in my bedroom and sleep a lot. Yesterday she was annoyed that I didn't come downstairs and socialize with her.

I went out to get some dinner with my husband for Valentine's Day on Saturday night. It was nice, but it took nearly all I had in me to shower, dress, makeup, wig-up, etc. and we were only out for an hour. I was totally exhausted the next day. I think that's why I'm so nervous about this work meeting tomorrow. I don't want to blow it or over do it.

My Mom came up to me today and says that they are going to leave on Saturday. I say that's fine. Then she wants to have a whole conversation about it. I keep repeating that it's fine. I think she must want me to ask her to stay or ensure that I'm at a point where they can go. I don't know what my status is. (I go on Thursday to have my drains looked at again, they are still producing so I'm afraid that they won't take them out yet. Then I still won't be cleared to drive.) I don't want to keep talking about it. I'm tired. Truthfully, I think it would be easier if they just go. They are now causing me more stress than helping, because they are pushing me to do things I don't want to do. I can figure out how to cover the things they have been doing like picking my son up from school and we can eat easy things for meals.

Anyway - mostly I'm just whining. I'm struggling because I wish I felt better/further along. I'm struggling because my family wants me to be further along and seem frustrated with me if I seem that I'm not.

stellamaris · February 2016

edwsmom: I wish I could convince you that you don't need to 'keep any balls in the air'. You have been and are going through a horrendous emotional and physical experience. It is normal to have down days, how can it not be? Please try to take this time to baby yourself. As women, we must learn to say "no, i can't do this today". We need to set expectations - "just because I was ok yesterday, doesn't mean I am ok today."

We have been attacked by this disease through no fault of our own. This is not the flu. The treatment is vicious. And we are doing it - beating it and getting better every day. It takes time and sometimes it is two steps forward and one step back. Please give yourself a big hug. Working through chemo?! You are one tough broad. Healing hugs going your way.

virginia123 · February 2016

OK, edswmom, you can do it! I am in sales as well and I can relate to the pressure of your situation. This will definitely not be the best proposal you have ever done and you shouldn't expect it to be. Do the best you can given your circumstances, rely on your experience and expertise, and just go get it done. You should not be expecting to close deals right now, so if it goes your way it will be a pleasant surprise. And if it doesn't there will be many more proposals for you to pitch when you are back on your feet. So do NOT worry about it, please! And come home and sleep 12 hours when you get home

Question for the lumpectomy ladies - did anyone else get a Biocoil/Biozorb placed during surgery? I did and it HURTS and no medicine is touching the pain. If you didn't get one, are you still having pain at the lumpectomy site or not?

Melgirl · February 2016

Edwsmom, I have days where all I want to do is cry. My chest still hurts like hell every day. But at least I have not had to put up with my Mother! When I first told her I have BC she said.... Oh you need me to come up there and help you....I said No thank you. And I said No every time she said it since then because I know it would have been much like your circumstances. I'm 2 weeks post BMX and yesterday she asked me what size shirt I wear so she could send me one. I was like Really???

DecisionFreak · February 2016

edwsmom, do what you can do and forget the rest. As long as your toddler knows he is loved, he will survive and thrive. Children are resilient.

It sounds like you are fortunate that your mother is leaving. What you have been through in the cancer treatment is the equivalent of a near deadly assault by a stranger. As others have said, what you have experienced is vicious. You don't have to pretend that you are at a party eating cake. You are not. The sweetness has to come from knowing that you made it through and that soon you will be healing and getting to a place where you have energy and drive again.

It's okay to cry and whine. You are a warrior. You are a very strong lady, but that doesn't mean that you have to be perfect. What you have to be is healed and healthy, and that will take time. My partial mastectomy, breast lift and reduction are going to take at least two months to heal. It is driving me crazy. I am fortunate in that my drains came out in 10 days, that I have had very little pain, and that I have had no infection. I gave in yesterday and paid a neighbor to do some housework, and I had him do some more work this morning and then drive me some places. I paid this man a big chunk of money but he helped take a load off of me. The PS is not allowing me to do housework or to bend over for 30 days after surgery.

everyone, I am doing okay but resentful. My mother is still in critical care. I think she has lost most of her lung function. My brother is in the hospital with gastroenteritis. I don't have anyone at the house to cook for me, and I can't do much for myself. I am an unhappy camper that I have helped my brother through some terrible times but he has done the least amount possible for me. I am angry that I cannot heal in peace. It will pass, but that is where I am today.

woodstock99 · February 2016

Ladies - you are so not alone. My mom is an 86-year old narcissist who I love but it is always about her. Luckily she is not in any physical condition to travel and I did not tell her about my surgery until the night before and told a white lie. I said I had a lump being removed & would be in the hospital a few days. I did not want to upset or worry her. My husband called her post-surgery to tell her I was ok and do you know 2 days later she called 911 to go to emergency because she was sure she was having a heart attack. She had a bad UTI which she has recurrently and is back there tonight. She has not called me once. I have to call her every day.

My younger sister and I have been estranged for about 8 years as she was & still pretty much is MIA when it came to my mom & step-dad (before he passed away 3 years ago). She & her family never did anything to help physically, emotionally or financially when he got dementia at the very end and I got alone got them out of their home and into assisted living and then him to memory care and have cared for my mom all these years with my husband. I have not seen or spoken to my nice & nephew who I treated like my own for years. She & I communicate via an occasional text.

I felt morally obligated to tell my sister exactly what was going on with me medically so that she and her daughter now know they have someone immediate in their family with BC. My sister sent me an awful robe in a size small. My sister knows that I probably never wore a size small in my life let alone at close to 63 and post-op so it was either a regift or purposely bought her size as she knew I'd return it as it came in a box from a store we do not have where I live and she get offended whenI mailed it back to her with a thank you note that it would be wasted on me.

Everyone - hang in there!

PS - went to PT assessment today & found out I have cording. How much more is there that our BS do not tell us about upfront? And from my research so little is known about this.

I had to practically beg for a PT referral as my BS said most BMX patients do not need. The PT also told me what I suspected and that I will have a dog ear on my back on the right side as I adamantly told BS I was not and would never do recon so to please make me flat.

I know this was not optional or elective surgery but I am really surprised by the lack of full disclosure and aftercare by BS. Maybe it's just the one I got or the facility I chose but if I do not advocate for me, I'd be in bigger trouble.

DecisionFreak · February 2016

Balthus, thank you for sharing the warm and fuzzy stories about your family! I think it helps people to know they are not alone. My mother does not want her own brother and sister at her deathbed. Her sister lives about a football field distance from my house, and her brother lives about three miles from me. We don't have anything to do with them. I saw that my brother had bought home a submarine sandwich from Wal-Mart earlier in the day before he got sick. I knew trouble was on the way but I didn't say anything. I was spitting nails that night when he got violently ill. So, now my brother who tries to be decent but who will not take care of his health lies in the hospital with my mother on death's doorstep.

Your saga of the robe was the best part. I won't have any children to torture and maybe that is a good thing.

I think you should ask your BS to send you to a plastic surgeon to fix the dog ear. Doctors are not allowed to leave patients with deformities or defects after breast cancer surgery. The plastic surgeon can probably get rid of the dog ear very quickly. At the very least, I would check into it. Write a letter and send it to the surgeon. People are terrified of anything in writing. I know. I am a writer who can make things happen with words using only a computer keyboard.

I think that the doctors do a terrible job of informing breast cancer patients of potential problems. I think women should go the distance to have breast surgery done by a surgical oncologist. If your surgeon was a breast cancer specialist then shame on her.

DecisionFreak · February 2016

Balthus, thank you for sharing the warm and fuzzy stories about your family! I think it helps people to know they are not alone. My mother does not want her own brother and sister at her deathbed. Her sister lives about a football field distance from my house, and her brother lives about three miles from me. We don't have anything to do with them. I saw that my brother had bought home a submarine sandwich from Wal-Mart earlier in the day before he got sick. I knew trouble was on the way but I didn't say anything. I was spitting nails that night when he got violently ill. So, now my brother who tries to be decent but who will not take care of his health lies in the hospital with my mother on death's doorstep.

Your saga of the robe was the best part. I won't have any children to torture and maybe that is a good thing.

I think you should ask your BS to send you to a plastic surgeon to fix the dog ear. Doctors are not allowed to leave patients with deformities or defects after breast cancer surgery. The plastic surgeon can probably get rid of the dog ear very quickly. At the very least, I would check into it. Write a letter and send it to the surgeon. People are terrified of anything in writing. I know. I am a writer who can work wonders with word warfare using only a computer keyboard and my inventive mind to get things accomplished.

I think that the doctors do a terrible job of informing breast cancer patients of potential problems. I think women should go the distance to have breast surgery done by a surgical oncologist. If your surgeon was a breast cancer specialist then shame on her.

stellamaris · February 2016

Everyone: thought this was too cute

grandma3X · February 2016

Stellamaris - Love the meme!

Moondust · February 2016

Grandma3X, I am very impressed that you have been to Antarctica! That is awesome!

Katja23, glad you had your rash checked before it got worse.

edwsmom, all I can say is Saturday can't come soon enough! Some people just don't understand how much extra hassle they cause by "helping". Keep saying No and good luck with the work issues.

DecisionFreak, good choice to pay the neighbor for some help. I'm sorry all these other things are going on in your life right now.

Balthus, it is a little scary how much information is not revealed when we consent for these treatments. I'm grateful for the advanced state of medicine that allows us to be helped so much, but I do wish they would not treat patients like children.

Stellamaris, I hope you are continuing to recover well.

grandma3X · February 2016

Edwsmom - ditto what everyone else said! Right now the best thing you can do for yourself is rest. I had surgery (long ago) when my son was 2 and my parents came to "help" for a week. As much as I love them, I was so happy when they left! I felt like I had house guests for a week that needed to be entertained, fed, etc.

Well, today I scheduled my next surgery to remove the nipple. It's tentatively set forMarch 9th. The BS said it will only take an hour and I will be under light sedation, so they are going to try to squeeze me in. I'm also going to see if I can schedule my prophylactic mastectomy for the good boob in May. I had considered waiting until next year, but at this point I just want to put all of this behind me and move on. March and April are kind of busy at work, and my niece is getting married in Tennessee in the middle of May, so I'll see if they can do it the week after her wedding. By then I should be fully recovered from this first MX as well.

PT is going well - I had another therapist yesterday who was very good. Balthus, I'm glad you convinced your BS to send you! Do you know what causes cording? I've read other posts about it but I'm not sure what it is.

Gardnersgirls - I saw on the TE thread that you are getting your first fill! I hope it goes smoothly after all you have dealt with!

MaryannLS · February 2016

I am January 18. Wire lumpect, nodes . I have a slight cold. Any suggestions for boosting immunity ?

Gardnergirls · February 2016

Thank you very much grandma3X! Everything went well! I'm sorry you're having to have your nipple removed and contemplating the prophylactic mastectomy. Hang in there, thoughts and prayers are with you.

Iwannacookie · February 2016

Thank you guys for responding to my worry about bleeding along my incisions. Since I wasn't feeling feverish or swollen, I just waited until my scheduled appointment, which was yesterday. My doc said the bleeding was perfectly normal, and she removed the steri-strips.

Now I just have to where a heavy duty sports bra and wait another 6 months to see how the girls settle.

If anyone is looking for a good sports bra--I found mine at Target. I feel very secure in it.

Wishing you all a good day!

woodstock99 · February 2016

grandma3x: cording info ----

http://www.lymphnet.org/membersOnly/dl/reprint/Vol...

Sorry waiting to see NP today and then PT so short message.

Best to all.

Logang · February 2016

Balthus: Thank you for the information on cording. When I went for a preop visit with PT I was told I already had some cording in the armpit of my affected side. I still have arm restrictions, but next Tuesday I will be free and am curious to see how bad this cording is when I start working on my ROM. Good luck at your appt today!

I am finally drain free as of 445 yesterday! Woo-hoo! March 2nd can't get here soon enough. I will find out my oncotype results that day when I follow up with my MO. I hope I don't need chemo. I go back to work on 3/7 and plan to work until the middle/end of May, then have my left prophylactic mastectomy and begin reconstruction. It's all riding on whether I need chemo...ugh.

That is great news iwannacookie!

Glad everything went well, gardnergirl!

Decisionfreak, I am glad you reached out for some help. Still sending prayers for your mom and brother!

Grandma3x, why do you have to have your nipple removed?

Maryann, welcome to the thread. Sorry you are feeling under the weather! I take extra vitamin C from fall through spring and also take fish oil year round. Make sure you get plenty of fluids!

grandma3X · February 2016

Thanks, Balthus for the information on cording!

Logang - I had a nipple-sparing mastectomy, but they found that their was a tiny spot of cancer under the nipple, so the BS recommended that I have it removed. If the margins are not clear, I'll need radiation next. I'm also having a prophylactic MX in May of the good boob so will see you in the May surgery thread

edwsmom · February 2016

I just wanted to take a minute to say THANK You to all of you for your support when I was feeling down. I really, really appreciate it!

CoolgrammieNC · February 2016

Hello Everybody, I'm am 10 days post surgery. My surgery was 13 hrs.lon, I didn't wake up until next day....crazy...the first week was awful only because my body would not accept any type of pain meds, stayed in hospital 6 days....been off all pain meds 8 days post op. And feeling 100% better....a little rough, but all behind me🙏🏼got my path reports, Dr. Said there was a lot more that never showed up on any of my scans, they were very surprised, but they got it all, margins clean, and no need for chemo or radiation, maybe just tamaxfin, find that out in couple weeks.GOD was with me along with all you wonderful women's prayers and thoughts, thank you....now my job is to rest and heal, I'm a happy camper....

mama26 · February 2016

Hi all. Haven't been on here in a while. No RADS for me as I had a clear path report!!!

I am officially cancer free! My biggest complaint from surgery is the muscle spasms. My chest gets as hard as a rock.

I am taking muscle relaxers but they aren't working very well. I've tried a heating pad also with little relief. I have my first fill

next week. I hope that doesn't make the spasms worse. I'm hoping for great results for all of you as well. Take care.

Melanie

January 2016 Surgeries

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