Winter 2015-16 RADS

Hi All!

I've been reading along for a couple of weeks here and there. I just finished chemo last week - 6 rounds of Taxotere-Cytoxan. Hooray!

SIM is next week and rads should be starting around March 1st and be 28 txs. Where I get my cancer tx is 5 hours from where I normally work and live, so I've been driving back and forth a lot.

No one ever mentioned dietary restrictions during chemo. I didn't ask though. I ate whatever I wanted, including sushi. up to Yum!!

I did ask about exercise restrictions during chemo and was told I could do whatever I felt up to doing. That was the best news. For the first 3 rounds I could still run at least 10 miles which I did maybe every other week, but usually ran 4-6 miles every other day and lifted weights and did plyometrics on non-running days. I even went snowboarding once in December in-between rounds 3 and 4 (and hopeful I can again in March). These last 2 rounds I can only run 6 miles and super slow, but that I think is more due to an adverse drug reaction which affected all my muscles (antibiotic taken prophylactically on vacation) and it has not resolved yet. Hoping my muscles get better soon. All things considered, I know I am doing well. Right now I am at work and worked almost full time during chemo but I'm not seeing my own patients (avoiding their germs!), just performing admin for the Rehab department.

What SeekingSerenity16 wrote above really resonated with me: "Being in the radiation suite is a confirmation that the cancer is real even though there are spans of time I don't even think about it because, I feel normal, I am strong, I work long hours, I exercise 7 days a week, have a full life and I feel happy; but, I have cancer and now the treatment may make me feel terrible, sick even...or going through with it may make me stronger than ever in ways that I never knew possible..."

That is me too...happy and strong and loving life regardless of cancer. The chemo was hard, and I did Ok with it all things considered...but every treatment was/is a reminder that I have cancer (so is looking in the mirror - being bald with no breasts). I hope it makes me stronger.

Not sure what radiation will bring. Another big fat unknown. And like KateB79, I worry about the collateral damage from rads...as well as chemo. More than any breast cancer recurrence is the worry/fear of something new hitting me later from having had chemo/rads.

I signed up for a running relay race in Moab in early May, which is 4 weeks after radiation ends. Fingers crossed I can do it (likely running 7-8 miles and then another 4-5 miles a few hours later). I might sign up for half marathon in June. The last one I did was in August a week before my before bilateral mastectomy. I keep pushing myself with working and exercise throughout cancer treatment because it was/is part of my usual lifestyle, it keeps me sane, and it keeps me distracted from thinking too much about cancer and what the treatment can do to me.

My life is still fantastic even with cancer...I see that. I am so grateful to have you all out here for support! No one else understands what I am going through they way you do.

- Andra xo

Welcome, Andra!

And CONGRATULATIONS, Zelda! Woo hoo!

welcome, Andra! I'm impressed. I was running before Dx but chemo knocked me down so much I was lucky if I could walk around the block or shop at Costco. Radiation is almost worse for me, but I hope you have a better experience and can keep up your runs! Do a mile for me, please!

Congrats, Zelda!

14/33 done. Realized on the table I'll hit the hallway mark this Friday. It's going by fast!

Hang in there ladies! Tomorrow is hump day! For those of you who have just finished or are close to finishing, moisturize, moisturize, moisturize! My RO said to keep doing it for about a month after I finished. My skin was really burnt afterwards, but now it just looks like a tan, and I never really peeled. Good luck everyone!

Congratulations Zelda!!

Finished 21 of 25 whole breast today then on to 8 boosts. Underarm has 2 spots and under breast has a line in the fold that are very red. Feels like rug burn and starting to seep just a bit. RO feels it will be fine. Just praying it doesn't get too much worse before I finish these last 4. Will be so glad when those are done and I can start healing. Been using the gel I have from the study and poofing cornstarch on it.

Got a little emotional today when he said oh it's fine. I feel like I am overreacting but thinking how bad can it get. I am ok if I keep my arm up and the air gets to it. Looks like a bad diaper rash, lol.

Hope everyone's week is going well. Husband has a cold so I told him I am not sleeping with him, don't want him breathing his germs on me All I need is that cold and I will be a basket case.

Thanks for this site and allowing me to rant....

Helen

Yay, Zelda....YAY!!!

Thanks KateB79, Twnkltoz, HappyHammer, and mdoc524!

I feel pretty knocked down from my pre-chemo ability level (which I was oddly the fittest in my life at 45 when I was diagnosed), but happy I am still running some miles a few days/week....and thinking that I am kicking cancer's ass with each mile! Hoping the radiation doesn't give me more fatigue than chemo. Sounds like for most of you it hasn't, but some are saying it has. I already decided that I will take time off work to rest long before I will give up exercise to rest. The exercise usually gives me more energy and makes me feel better anyway.

Hooray to everyone finishing up!!

- xo

Kate I have had 6 treatments with every other being with the bolus and after today I noticed most of the area is pink. I am suppose to have the bolus every other day for 28 treatments. I can't imagine having it every day. I see my RO tomorrow so I will be curious what they say as far as the pink so quickly. Congrats on the house I am sure it is wonderful. We are searching for my daughter in your area - she made an offer on a house in Portland and the owner would not budge on asking price and would not pay for any closing cost (why even list) - so I am sure we will be out looking again this weekend.

Mary my shoulder has also felt tight along with my side. I will be asking the RO about that tomorrow.

Tomorrow is hump day so another week almost over. Hope for minimal side effects for everyone.

Connie

Kate- ok, so you are KILLING rads...you are a WARRIOR as are ALLof the other women (and men doing it)....but that is short term therapy and you JUST BOUGHT A HOUSE- for the LONG TERM!!! Whoo-hoo.

And, YES, Marijen- I took 1/2 an Ativan EVERY SINGLE DAY OF RADS and sometimes a whole one )SIM, etc)....it was emotional for me for so many reasons and on so many levels....TAKE the MEDS....that is why it is offered and it is a short term fix for a short term treatment. PLEASE pm me if you have any reservations, questions, needs to vent....am enough ahead of you that I may be able to help? SERIOUSLY- nothing wrong with an anti depressant and or anti anxiety med- BC and all that is involved is enough to make you sad and anxious.

Marijen, yup, I sure did! I never used an antidepressant or anti anxiety medication before BC! I've said it before and I'll say it again, it's the best thing I've done for myself since being diagnosed!

HappyHammer is so right on. It's there, take it for a short time to get through this terrible adjustment to BC! I was a basket case before starting rads. I was crying all the time, I was extremely paranoid about long term radiation SEs. I nearly didn't do the boost. I'm done ,it's over, I'm glad I did the whole prescribed treatment! I couldn't have made it through without Celexa! I am happy and feeling "normal". I'm seeing my PCP in April to discuss going off it.

BTW, Xanax made me very sleepy,start with a 1/4 or 1/2 pill until you know what works best for you.

I would feel like I'm begging. I'm icing the incisions, they already hurt.

I have a bottle of Ativan in the medicine cabinet, just in case. I got it during chemo, since it works as an anti-nausea as well as an anti-anxiety. I took it at night when I was all roided up before infusions.

I don't take it anymore, but I'm glad it's there. There is absolutely nothing wrong with anyone who is in cancer treatment asking for anti-anxiety meds, even if it feels like begging. I mean it. We need to do everything we can to stave off PTSD. I did a long meditation (guided) yesterday, and it worked well. If it hadn't? Half an Ativan would have.

I'm pretty sure they zapped me yesterday before I was holding my breath. One of the techs tried to say they took a port film, but what port film takes seven seconds? Sigh. Whatever.

I wasn't pink when I woke up this morning. Maybe there's something to the Aquaphor-at-night thing.

Here's a question: since I had my tx later in the day yesterday, I noticed a potential pattern. I feel fine for the first couple of hours after tx, but then at about eight hours following tx, I start to get tired and sort of weird-feeling. That's fine, and I'm glad I know what to expect, but has this happened to anyone else?

Happy Wednesday. Two more to go this week!

KateB79. I was told to breathe naturally through the whole thing. Radiation, first thing I thought about when I opened my eyes. I might ask about med when the time is right, like when I get there.

So yesterday I asked about "some borderline nodes" In my clavicle area. The RO looked at my CT scan and said they were "Noticeable". Hmmm they were like two little black peas. I wake up and think oh yeah black means cancer in an MRI, or does it? I will have to ask about that too

Thanks JustMaxiMom and KateB79!

I am trying to hydrate more and I think it is helping with the dizziness. Now, I have to go potty all day long. My table time is between 30-45 minutes and I was squirming like one of my 3rd grade students, because I had to go! It does make the sessions more interesting and helps get my mind off of the giant laser beam. I will have treatment #13 after school. (34 total) My skin is okay....tight and pink and itchy. Looking forward to the weekend off.

Thanks for everyone's input on stress. I'll mention it that I have this free floating stress feeling right from the start. I figured out why it's ok for me to breathe- they are working on my right side, no heart involvement, but it does get my right lung a little bit. Mostly worried about the two "noticeable" clavicle nodes. Bummer. And they have green tea in the waiting room. No mention of no anti-oxidants. I would think you have to do a lot to make a difference anyways.