Starting Chemo in October 2015

Thank you MDW & Jedrik! All the best to you!

Hooray Kim - chemo done - woohoo!!! Is there a winter 2016 rad board? Is that the official title of the board?

Thanks everyone for the encouraging words about my running even though I feel pretty discouraged right now about my ability/fitness level. Prior to chemo starting I could easily run a half marathon (competed in 3 over the summer and had my best performances in my life) or hike all day at high altitude etc. After B mastectomy and for the first two rounds of chemo I was still able to run 10-12 miles as a long run once every couple of weeks, and 4-6 miles every other day at a 9min/mile pace. Now I'm running half that distance and super slow...I'm short of breath, and my leg muscles feel terrible since the antibiotic. I have no push and by evening it is hard to walk because I'm so stiff. Yesterday I told myself I was still doing really well and tried to just be happy that I was out there doing something in the beautiful outdoors even though it didn't feel right. Maybe this is what chemo does to me when I don't get anything (Neulasta) to boost my immune system (as Jedrik said)....and it is now cumulative. I'm staying focused on one more chemo round to go and hopeful that I can build back up during radiation treatment. Have to believe that this is temporary. Time will tell. Maybe I can go snowboarding in March right before the season ends.

I also usually stand at work when doing admin - bought a sweet stand-up work station last year - but I have to go back to sitting now.

Just scheduled SIM for radiation on Feb 16th, assuming my Feb 2nd chemo goes off as planned. Rad tx should start either Feb 29th or March 1st and go 28 txs into first week of April.

xo

Hi ladies,

I hope everyone is hanging in there okay with SEs and life in general.

I'm riding along on the Week 3 wave of feeling a lot better. I'm finding myself weirdly excited about Monday, when I get my last (LAST!!!) infusion. I'm just so eager to get it done and get this part of the journey behind me. Of course, I'll still have to get through a couple of rough weeks post-infusion, but hopefully it'll go quickly. I'm feeling so optimistic that I even committed to a business trip to Denver during the last week of February. That'll be about five weeks out from Round 6, so hopefully it won't wipe me out too much. I need to start getting my head back in the game at work.

I've been going for walks daily for the past week--which simultaneously feels good AND makes me aware that my leg muscles and stamina are a wreck. But I'm starting to shift my thinking to post-chemo, and to things I want to do to ensure my health long-term--such as getting more consistent exercise, getting my weight down a bit (I'm 26 on the BMI scale, which is just above the top "healthy" end), and tweaking my diet (e.g., avoid sugar, increase plant-based foods, drink more green tea, demote wine intake to a glass only on weekends, etc.).

Food has also been so much more enjoyable this week. I find myself craving a lot of the things I avoid in the first two weeks of cycle because of the Big D. Vegetables, fruit, whole grains, etc. I'm craving salads and sushi like crazy.

ncsue: your post about the explosive gas made me giggle. I've had similar issues all the way through chemo--AND I burp a ton, which just adds to the charm factor. I like your attitude about maybe never getting back to "normal", but being so much better in other ways. I hope the same for myself and for all of us. I'm glad the antibiotics got you well again, even though your white count/hemo are not where they could be. Glad it wasn't enough to delay treatment.

Andra, I'm sorry about the discouragement you're feeling. You're like a superhero to everyone here, what with continuing to stay as active as you have through chemo, but I know it must be hard to be so far below where you used to be. I hope you do get to snowboard in March.

I had my mammography yesterday (it was a marathon...there were numerous mammogram pictures from various angles, and they also did a lengthy US session of both the IDC mass and my axilla, since the December US didn't look at the axilla), and I'll have my MRI this Friday night. So eager to get these over with and hopefully get an answer on surgical approach soon after.

Wishing everyone a great day!

--Meara

Yay Jclc, done chemo! It was pretty anticlimactic for me as well, but so good to be finished!

MDW, I feel like you, shifting my thinking to post-chemo life and long-term health. Eating healthier, consistent exercise, etc. etc. Glad you are feeling better, keep us posted on your surgery!

Andra, feeling good today?

Yay Kimmer and Jclc!! Congratulations on your last chemo woo hoo! (insert bell ringing!)

Thanks for the info about coasting Jedrig. I think that's what is happening. Really hoping that this neuropathy is temporary!

Andra, you are doing great-hang in there! A few miles is better than none! We are throwing some pretty heavy duty poison at our bodies, so I think we should expect them to not perform as they normally would. I know its frustrating though. Have you been able to eat anything tasty?

MDW-glad you are feeling better and enjoying food-yay! Good luck with your MRI tomorrow, and your final chemo next week.

I went ahead and buzzed my fuzz down again today. It is good to no longer feel scruffy. It is taking me way longer to recover from this round. My taste is still off, but my nausea is finally better today. The fatigue really seems to be hanging on.

My son has his final audition for All State Chorus tonight. He also has two tests tomorrow, so things are rather tense around here, lol. Thankfully we will only have rain, no snow.

I hope all of you in the winter storm's path stay safe and warm this weekend.

Yay, Kimmer amd Jclc83 on being done with chemo!!!

Andra, I'm so sorry that you aren't able to do what you love. I really hope it gets better for you quickly.

BellaV, I always liked the on body injector for neulasta. I hope it works perfectly for you!

Isn't it funny how nervous we get about maybe missing a chemo session? At the beginning, I was so afraid of it, now I am obsessed with nothing getting in my way of my weekly chemo. I can't get sick because I need that chemo on Thursday! No bad roads from snow, if theu are, we'll just have to get there somehow! Lol! I'm intent on not disappointing my kids again amd getting to go on our trip the day after my last chemo. So, I can't miss any chemo if that means adding it to the end!

have you tried looking at lands end for a swimsuit Homeschool

Hi everyone! We are all ready for snow here! All my kids schools have already been canceled for tomorrow so at least we can sleep in and not have to worry about making lunches and catching buses.

Homeschool, I am so with you on the large prosthesis. I'm so tired of being lopsided. I don't mind my silicone prosthesis, but I have also taken to wearing a bra with no foam inserts on the side that still intact and a pile of three or four inserts on the right side. It doesn't look as real, but sometimes it's just easier.

I had an appointment with the physical therapist yesterday because I've had a little swelling under my arm and I was worried about lymphedema. She gave me the whole exercise regimen for manual lymphatic drainage. She also said the intense itching on the back of my shoulder and upper back that I can never seem to satisfy is a sign that some of the nerves might be regenerating...I can only hope!

I had my appointment with the radiation oncologist today and I'm going to start rads on February 15. I guess I will see some of you on the winter rads board, but I'll deathly hang around here to to see how everyone is doing.

My last chemo is next Tuesday (my youngest son's 10th birthday) and I'm already tired of everyone trying to get me to celebrate right when I finish the infusion. It's hard to get people to understand that it doesn't feel over that day or even a week later. I'm not sure when this is ever going to feel "over." *sigh*

Take care everyone!

So great to read about one after the other doing or approaching her last cycle of chemo, not so great to read struggles with SEs and getting feet back on the ground. My thoughts are with you.

I was actually very eager to get through without a delay from the very start, even if a bit scared and tense. Sort of like always with chores I don't enjoy: If I have to do it, I might as well do it properly and get it over quickly. Though, mind you, every time I dreaded facing that inescapeable series of SEs even more once the stuff was inside. At least I learned to accept that the sky won't come crashing down if I'm not on the top of my game.

Getting closer to get back to normal really cheers me up no end, I'm next to bouncy atm - with no steroids in my system and next to normal as possible - and a bit scared to come down from this for whatever reason. Not quite three weeks and I'll be through the worst of the last cycle of SEs. Reassuring to read that I'm not the only one starting to turn thoughts into the future. We'll rock it!

how sweet that we are all winding down chemo - Hooray!! So nice to read about so many moving on to the next stage. Healing and progress!!!

My muscles feel best when I first wake up, so I'm sticking with my morning exercise. This morning I ran a mile with the dogs and lifted weights. After working 9-10 hrs days the past two days, it's so hard to get my muscles to cooperate at night. So freakin stiff no matter how much I am moving and changing positions at work. Some leg swelling still going on so I'm elevating at night and compressing during the day too. I've also been short of breath and my heart seems to pounding more this round...and the night sweats are a given. Oddly today seems a bit better all around...and I'll take it!!

The next 7 days will be iffy as my white counts plummet. I've had to do one-on-one performance reviews with my staff in a small office this week. I kept thinking about their germs in the background of my thoughts. Wiped down my office in between each person coming in!

Tomorrow morning I am leading a small group on a 6 mile hike into a canyon that parallels Canyon de Chelly (which you need a Navajo guide for) that leads to some Anasazi ruins that are over 1000 years old. Yay! I've done this hike many times/year over the past 18years, and I think my legs will be OK for it. Everyone going is either a medical provider, therapist, or pharmacist...which is so funny to me.

Been eating some yummy curry dishes this week. One of them was a frittata I made for our department meeting yesterday that was curry spiced and had sweet potato, broccoli, spinach, onion, and cheese. So delicious and thankful for some leftovers for the weekend! Someone brought in gourmet brownies and they actually tasted great this round.

Glad you ordered the breast prosthesis Homeschool - I hope it helps relieve some of the back/neck/shoulder muscle pain you've been having (thinking it can't all be the port).

Meara - Hope the MRI went well today. Now go get some sushi!!!

Trying to figure out how to celebrate my last chemo on Feb 2nd. Maybe just a nice dinner out with my love. ???

happy Friday everyone!

Andra xo

andra, jealous of the hike, would love to do that! So happy you are getting out and about! Yay!

I am also a little envious of those in the snow storm, we rarely get the white stuff here, it's all rain and we rust all winter!

Congrats to all coming to the end of chemo, it warms my heart to hear and to see all that we have come through, we are strong ladies!

Have a great weekend

Having a bit of an emotional day, not sure why but I want to blame hormones (or lack thereof from chemo). It's like I want just a few hours break from this....to completely forget or be unaware about having cancer, and muscle problems, and chemo side effects, and being bald. Ridiculous. I know how truly fortunate I am, but it sure would be nice to have a few hours respite from this *junk*! I know you all understand this.

My partner asked me today about us going away for a weekend to celebrate - a few weeks after last chemo when I should be feeling my best, but before radiation starts. Yay! We can't go for longer than a weekend because he is a professor and spring semester has started, but even a just weekend away together will be wonderful.

Yesterday's hike was fantastic! 11 people went including me. I struggled hiking up to the ruins, and back up and out of the canyon because of my muscles (anything 'up' is hard), but I don't think anyone noticed....I hide it well. Here are a few pics from it...the hike down in and what the canyon looks like. Only one of my two dogs went, but we had 4 dogs total.

Thanks Kim!

Yeah...I miss my hair so much too. I just found the bag of it this afternoon while straightening up and it brought me to tears (was saving it to maybe felt it into something quirky ??). Never looked at my hair as luxurious before, but wow it was! At this point I would be happy with a a few millimeters like it was when I first buzzed it. I also tend to keep my head covered, mostly because it is freakin cold...but I was hiking with friends/coworkers and they've all seen me bald often. When it felt hot for a while midday on the hike, it was nice to let my baldy head feel the sun. And...when a hot flash hits, I'll take off my hat no matter where I'm at, no matter how public. I sweat quickly and it's awful. I'm eager to see if the flashes and night sweats taper off a few after chemo is done.

Hope everyone had a super weekend! Love and hugs....

- Andra xo

Andraxo,

Thanks for sharing these amazing photos. They, and the fact that you were able to hike six miles are inspiring. I agree that you rock bald.... truthfully, I think we all do. Wigs and caps and scarves are great, but it would be nice not to feel like I HAVE to wear a wig to the office. The other day, I was home and needed to let a repair man into our apartment building. So I went out to the hall to unlock the basement door in all my hairless splendor. I couldn't understand why he gave me such a strange look until I realized I'd forgotten to put on a hat. LOL.