Stage 1B/grade 2 what tests to request?
Hello everyone, sorry to have to meet you this way....
I was diagnosed Oct 26 with stage 1B IDC, grade 2 and am starting radiation in another week or so. After hearing all the stories of women who have similar diagnoses to mine and find out they have mets elsewhere, what tests should I push for when I see the doctor (radiation oncologist) again tomorrow? I have negative lymph involvement but I've seen others who have the same and yet.... surprise, it's cancer all over the place.
I can barely seem to sleep anymore because I'm worried it's just ravaging secret places in my body. Is there any kind of test that will say for certain that yes, I'm good? I've been told so many times not to worry, from the time I found the lump in the first place up to now, and I don't know if I'm completely panicked or what. I'm hoping objective opinions will help.
Comments
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aqua...newly diagnosed and going through active treatment, it is not uncommon to worry if you might have a more advanced cancer. I'm sorry to say that with a favorable diagnosis, it is unlikely that your team would require more imaging. That said, if you are symptomatic, then discuss it with your team. If not, feel safe in knowing you are being aggressive in your treatment and you will hopefully not visit this disease again! Many of us worry often early on and most of us do, one day, let go of that worry as we move further away from active treatment. I wish you well!
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It isn't even that I think I'm symptomatic, generally speaking. More so now that I KNOW I have cancer, I'm worrying about every little thing. Like, oh my period has been weird the past few months, must be cancer. My head hurts, I hope it isn't cancer. That type of thinking. I waited going to the doctor for this lump for months just thinking it was nothing, so now I'm wondering if all the other things going on are true issues and I should do something about them. Maybe cancer has made me insane. Could be either.
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This is so normal and you will worry for a while. I had a hard time hearing my good prognosis. All I could think about was cancer. That will pass. You know your body. And you are in active treatment so you can bring these things up. I found that seeing a counselor right after treatment helped me ease my mind. You can ask for a PET scan. Some docs will do them for early stage people but many don't. They are expensive and there are lots of false positives that require follow up.
I also highly recommend Ativan to help during this difficult time
Good luck with radiation
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Aquafriday121-
We want to welcome you to our community here at BCO. We're so sorry that you find yourself here, but we're glad you've joined us. You have come to the right place for support! Like Mom and Voracious have said, worrying about mets is very normal, at this stage and throughout, really. But you're in active treatment, and hopefully son you will start to feel a bit more comfortable and a little less worried and scared. We do encourage you to speak about these fears with your doctors, and perhaps seek out a therapist to help you work through them. Needing mental health support (whether in the form of therapy or medication) is also very, very common, and for many, very helpful.
The Mods
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aquafriday121- I am a "worry" type of person (high anxiety) on a normal day
and I worry about everything. So, as you can imagine as a newly diagnosed woman (Dec 22nd), my mind has been torturing me about all the what ifs and what if this thing is carrying on in other places of my body besides my left breast, etc. I called my doctor today and asked for a prescription for Zoloft and I tell my counselor (who I see weekly for grief counseling from the loss of my father 3 years ago) tomorrow about my diagnosis. I will make the decision then if I should stay with her or perhaps seek a counselor who specializes with people with cancer. I actually have on my list of questions for the doctor about how exactly will I know for sure that it is gone and is not attacking some other little corner of my body. Not sure what answer(s) I will get, but I must ask for my sanity
Anyhow, I'm no help with advice, but wanted to say I understand where you are coming from and you are not alone in what you are thinking.
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My husband has been trying to get me to go to a group meeting or something, but it seems silly being such a "good" case that I don't want to piss off anyone that's more advanced than I am. Is that dumb? I don't know if it will help, being around other people. I can't stop crying when I talk to anyone who isn't family about what's going on (doctors, etc). Today at the radiologist's he asked how I was doing and started sobbing before I even realized what was happening. I felt ridiculous even though I'm sure it happens all the time. Anyway. I think it's good that there is a board like this. I'm just probably going to worry forever. The rad onc didn't want to prescribe me any sort of xanax or anything, he said to see my regular doctor, which is a laugh (I never had one, all this went through my ob/gyn and then straight to a breast surgeon). Things are a straight up mess right now. But I'm still alive, so....
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momand2kids I lived in Waltham, MA for a few years before moving back to NY metro area and I miss it dearly. I ordered my husband special coffee from a coffee shop we loved in Boston for Christmas. It was a fortune to ship but soooo worth it!
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Aqua
hope you are doing ok....you will stop worrying, or at least it won't be your everythought..... I would encourage you to go to a group or to a therapist--it can really help (I did therapy during the process-it was a great place to work on these fears). I hope you can find some peace in the new year-but give yourself a break, it is still very early in the process for you......
hugs
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Hi Aqua!
It sounds like your ob/gyn has been your de facto "regular doc." Many women use their ob/gyn as their PCP. You just need to make sure that yours is ok with filling that role for you...or they may prefer to help you find a PCP instead. Your ob/gyn may well (then) order tests like blood cholesterol, etc. that they would otherwise assume were being handled by (another) doc (your PCP).
You will want to make sure that your PCP (either your ob/gyn, or a PCP that the ob/gyn helps you find) gets copies of everything. You should expect that eventually you'll come out of treatment and be "beyond" follow up by the cancer specialists. You'll want your "reg doc" to have copies of all of your cancer paperwork.
Call the ob/gyn and ask for an appointment--tell them that they're your PCP and referred you to the breast surgeon, etc. You'd like a followup w/ them. Given they referred you, they should be happy to see you. And you can talk about formalizing a PCP relationship (or getting help for a referral to someone else.
HTH,
LisaAlissa
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Aqua - I was totally crazed for several months at Dx. It is the first time most of us have had to face our own mortality and that my dear takes some getting used to. I highly advise getting some anti anxiety meds. Onc are now obliged to address the emotional aspect of this but if they won't give you something insist that your gyn does. I had never taken anything but I NEEDED them. You won't need to take them long term, just until you are able to get a handle on everything. I'm glad you found us. There is a lot of compassion and wisdom here. Hang in there. You won't always feel like you do now.
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ps - is there any chance you are actually pt1b which is actually stage 1A. I'm basing that on the size of your tumor (under 1 cm)
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oh and to address your original post you'll want an oncotype Dx test to determine the need for chemo or not. Also second opinions are a good idea if you feel you need it.
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Lucy I think that's exactly it. I'm finally realizing I can and will die eventually. Just the fact that this has come up, and cancer is such a huge unknown to the medical community for the most part, and I don't know what will eventually happen to me, is driving me crazy. I told my husband the other day that it feels like I already have one foot in a grave with all this, not from this bout of cancer but from the next one that'll inevitably kill me. I don't know how to make my mind stop jumping to that because I know logically that from what all the doctors are telling me, I'll be fine. But then I see everyone's signatures in their posts and people who started out where I am were suddenly stage IV and on their last legs. I've never felt such an intense fear before, and it's like I'm almost resigned to it happening. Clearly not the best way to start a recovery and fight this, with this kind of thinking.
I plan on asking the doctor about my staging because you're right, the tumor itself was small and I had no lymph involvement, so I don't know what made him bump me up. Could be I'm remembering wrong, I seem to be forgetting everything but my own name at this point.
I'm planning on attending a group session next week to see if it's the right thing for me. Either way I know I need something.
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Does your med facility have a social worker you could speak to? Or a nurse navigator? Even just one contact with them can ease your mind. I was able to get a Stephen Minister from my church who I met with weekly. In her "day" job she worked as a cancer social worker. She was a tremendous help to me. I wish I could make this scary time just disappear but instead we all just have to hang on until our brains can get a grip on being in "crisis" mode and the fear starts to ease.
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Aqua, the part about people's signatures changing? That may be a bit misleading... Generally, people come here during their diagnosis or treatment, then leave. If their biopsy is negative (80% are!) they leave and move on to the other challenges in their lives. ( Looking at the stories of the people who stay makes it look like nearly everyone who gets biopsies has cancer...and we know that's not true.)
Similarly most people stay through their treatment, then leave. And while they're in treatment, they tend to post on threads related to what's going on in their treatment stage. The people who stay long term (and who are thus more likely to post in support of newcomers) tend to fall into a couple of categories.
Those who stay in treatment, (or return and then stay in treatment) which would be the Stage IV people and the Lymphedema people.
And those who just continue to post, like (for a very long time) Beesie. For example, I returned recently to help a friend, and saw a few threads where I thought I could be helpful, so I did), but I don't expect to stay.
So the fact that you see so many Stage IV signatures shouldn't be taken as a prophecy of your own future.
HTH,
LisaAlissa
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Aqua,
I was just diagnosed on 12/30 with IDC grade 3 and dcis. Yes, the waiting and the unknown is horrible and can ramp up anyone's anxieties. But you need to start thinking more positively about this and start believing in yourself that you will win this. Get that "one foot in the grave" thought out of your head. Those thoughts will not help you.
I just made my second opinion appt for next week at one of the top cancer hospitals in the world. Dana Farber in Boston. This is what my patient lesson told me... "This is treatable. Take a deep breath and continue breathing. Nothing is going to change in a week." And then she told me to get a party bus for my support teamand drink mimosas on the way in! I love her;)
Every minute of every day, cancer treatments, technologies and advancements get better and better.
Take a deep breath, keep breathing and enjoy each day until you are cured. It will happen. Be strong my new friend... Ok?
And ditto to everything that LisaAlissa said;)
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Everyone talks about “chemo brain” and “endocrine fog,” but nobody mentions the main psychological side effect of breast cancer: PARANOIA! We all suddenly revert to being like second-year med students, who are convinced they have symptoms of every disease they study, except for us it’s a corollary. Because cancer has happened to us, we see it lurking beneath the bed and just around every corner. Symptoms that we would never have noticed before--or that we rationally accepted were due to infections, injuries or aging--are suddenly ominous harbingers of metastases. That is completely irrational...and entirely par for the course. Before we had cancer, we were all at risk of one ailment or another, and cancer doesn’t change that. It doesn’t turn angina into lung mets, migraines into brain mets, arthritis into bone mets, or ulcers/gallstones/GERD into liver mets.
It will get easier to let go of fear and get on with and past treatment. But it may take some time. That’s why we’re here for you in the meantime.
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Thank you all for doing what my husband hasn't been able to do in two months: make me feel like I'm not actually crazy. He does his best to make me feel like this is just a blip in our (long) lives together but there's no way to make him understand how my brain has taken a nosedive off the deep end. I'm not "that" person that worries about every little bump and ache. But suddenly, I'm the person it happened to when all my life I've been saying it wouldn't happen to me.
Lisa, thank you for putting this into perspective! I hadn't even thought of things that way about people leaving the boards. I suppose it's true that people wouldn't stick around once they're "cured" and I'm not even worried about this particular diagnosis. It sucks but it's treatable. I'm worried about what may come next, the more aggressive version, the mets to somewhere I wasn't prepared for. This dx has changed everything about how I think about life.
I've considered going to Sloan Kettering but it'd be a huge hassle going into NYC for every radiation treatment and appointment, and I have heard mixed reviews. It makes me wish I were back in Boston to go to Dana Farber (one of many reasons I wish we hadn't left but I digress...)
I'm Diane, btw. Really, thanks to everyone. Actually talking about this instead of pretending things are ok has been pretty helpful. Who would have guessed.
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Diane, I am feeling exactly like you, diagnosted November 24th, On anxiety pills since then. Reading all this makes me feel way bette
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So glad I came back to this thread. I have been thinking the same thing (looking down the line of it coming back because of seeing so many signatures with that happening). Thank you Lisa and Sandy for your replies.
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I have a couple appts tomorrow for various things so I'm going to ask about the anxiety meds. This has actually alleviated a lot of the worry I've been stewing over the past few months, so that's a plus. I feel a vague sense of - dare I say it - relief? That maybe this won't be as much a death sentence as I've been building it up in my mind.
I am starting to read Living Well Beyond Cancer and there was a line in there, something to the effect of it isn't jinxing myself to plan for later down the line, and I just cried because YES, that is EXACTLY what I am feeling. Almost like, what right do I have to plan now? Everything is up in the air. And me being a "planner," it's tremendously unsettling.
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I just want to check on you and ask how you're doing.
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Kona, I'm doing better. I think I needed some time still to process everything happening to me, and the possibilities. I spoke with the nurse at the RO's office and she helped me feel more relaxed about everything. Basically she said I need to get off the internet, lol. Everyone's different and my future is not foretold based on what happens to everyone else. It's harder than I thought to get the idea out of my mind but I'm at least starting to narrate future events in my life in terms of "when" instead of "if." I never did get those anxiety meds because the RO told me to go back to my PCP for that and I honestly don't want to deal with the hassle of yet another doctor appointment (and my PCP is an hour away - long story).
How have you been feeling? More settled? More optimistic?
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I found the herbal tea, Tension Tamer, really good if you can't get to ativan. In any case, we get shell shocked on learning we have breast cancer and each of us deals with it different ways. I worried and worried too then in 2013, I had another diagnosis I'm my right breast.....so worrying didn't do a damned thing except steal away good days. I kept diligent and both were caught in early stage. I didn't get the oncotypeDX for either but you might want to ask about that too. As a general rule, EXCEPT for her2+ and triple negative, recurrences for ER/PR+ tumours = to or less than 1 cm is low, despite grades. My sister has been diagnosed with stage 4, metastatic spinal cord collapse breast cancer, so I am grateful I am well enough to take care of her. Sometimes you just have to run with the positive because there are others who have very little to be positive about.....but my sister is an absolute trooper. I walked miles blubbering and wanting to throw myself in a ditch and die.....but she grabbed the bull by the horns, is alive, walking and we are enjoying life. An inspiration!!!! But, feel your feelings and you will "get there"! (((HUGS))))
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I saw my oncologist on Monday and he was telling me about my good prognosis, no chemo in my case, hormonal therapy for 5/10 years but I am really having a hard time asimilating the "good news" I asked him for a PET scan, but he says there is no need for it in my case. I am moving countries in 2 weeks and already have an appointment with another oncologist, let's see if he agrees with this one, but if he offers chemo I am jumping on it.
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