Hi all
What a whirlwind day, and not in a good way. I'm 45 and recently found a lump on my left breast. I saw my PCP this morning, thinking that I would be told it was some hormonal change or something, she told me that she was "worried" and sent me immediately for a stat mammogram and ultrasound. This afternoon I got the call that it was "highly suspicious" and I am now scheduled for a biopsy of the mass and a lymph node on Wednesday.
I'm trying really hard not to dwell on it, but I'm really scared and anxious. I understand that worrying about it won't change it. I've been fluctuating between "I got this, I'll be ok" and anger and almost panic.
I've read many posts here and I see that I'm definitely not alone...the unknown is horrible.
Comments
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You are definitely not alone. I'm sorry you're having to go through this, especially this week. Unfortunately we have no power over timing. Sounds like you have a great doctor who acted quick to get tests ordered. Waiting is so hard. Should this turn out to be cancer, it will be a whirlwind of information and emotion. You came to a great place for support from those who have walked in your shoes. Yes you got this, but give yourself a pass ocassionaly. We all break down and panic. Its ok.
Wishes for b9 results. Hugs.
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If we just didn't have to go into the Tunnel of Waiting, I think we'd all be better off. But until they can do all the screening and biopsies and run it under the microscope all in the same day, we're stuck with this hellish period of time between 'highly suspicious' and what it really is.
I remember kicking the wall during my Tunnel of Waiting, until I realized it was MY wall. I remember being so sad that I could barely navigate. What I can tell you is that, for most of us, that is just a temporary phase. Once you know what you have to deal with (or not), things improve immediately. I think humans don't cope well with uncertainty but rise to the challenge once there is something to do. As someone told me then, 'you will be happy again' and it's true.
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Thank you ladies, I truly appreciate it. As its getting later and later I'm starting to wish I had taken my doctors offer to give me something to relax.
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Yes, anti-anxiety meds can be very helpful. At our first meeting, my MO offered me an antidepressant. I didn't need it until I started Aromasin, but once I asked for it, it was a done deal. I was 46 when I found my lump; it's no fun whenever you find it. If it's any comfort, since breast cancer is a common diagnosis, most medical centers operate from the same protocols and recommend similar regimens. But, if you feel like a regimen doesn't suit your particular case, be sure to ask for a second opinion.
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I think humans don't cope well with uncertainty but rise to the challenge once there is something to do. As someone told me then, 'you will be happy again' and it's true.
SO TRUE!!!!
thanks for reminding us,
Alicki
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