April 2015 Chemo Crew... Starting in April? Please join us!

I had a sad moment when I was decorating my tree this year. A long time ago, I started collecting these brass filigree ornaments - I pick one up whenever I'm in a new place or vacation, and I love taking each one out and putting it on the tree and remembering that time. Only this year, there is no new ornament. We didn't go anywhere new due to the dang BC. It made stop and think if I should get a BC ornament.

I have such mixed feelings about the BC/pink ribbon stuff. I mean, on the one hand, it is what happened this year, and it would be a momento. OTOH, I don't want to remember this. Last night I went to a gathering with some people I used to work with. The woman who used to be my manager gave me a gift - it turned out to be a pin of Swarovski crystals with a pink ribbon embedded in it. It was a lovely thought, but right then and there I knew that I would never wear such a thing. I realized that I do not want to out myself as someone who had bc at all. How do you guys feel about it?

Heather - thanks for letting me know. It's kinda what I thought, but I wasn't 100% sure.

Lynne

Edited to add - I did a search on bc Christmas ornament - brass filigree, and I didn't find any, so I feel like that is my sign NOT to have one.

Hi all!

I've been reading the recon stuff with interest...when I had my BMX I did not know that immediate recon was an option...my BS told me that I could consider it "in a couple of years". I have been referred to a PS but that was months ago and I have not gotten a call about an appointment yet. No hurry though. If I don't hear anything by the new year I will call the office. I intend to have boobs made from my tummy fat, of which I have an abundance. Hmmm...D cups? My RO did warn me though that it may be tricky because I have had a previous abdominal surgery. We'll see what the PS has to say.

So I'm flat chested. I did get prostheses right after my BMX and they look quite natural. They were covered by my medical plan, which is good because they cost $500 each! Wow. Then there are bras. I have three...one was covered by my plan, I paid for one and the third one was thrown in for free. I wear the prostheses out but don't bother if I'm not taking my coat off - ie, grocery shopping. I know, I worry too much about my appearance but I have a big tummy and it looks funny with no boobs.

Re wearing pins etc. - I have one BC t-shirt but have only worn it a couple of times...don't really want to advertise. A couple of friends gave me one of those necklaces you can put charms inside of...two of the charms are BC ones and I do wear them, but they are tiny. I am open about it though...everyone knows about it and that is fine. I look at it as an opportunity to educate when I am asked questions. People really are interested. I like to show folks that having cancer is not necessarily a death sentence and that life does go on after diagnosis.

Andrea

I'm so glad for everyone's good medical news!

I didn't recon and don't plan to. I sometimes see men doing a bit of a double-take, probably because I've got a nice big ass but nothing up top. However, wearing earrings seems to signify my gender sufficiently.

I am not sure when my cancerversary is. First mammogram? Diagnosis, even though it was incomplete? Second diagnosis? Surgery? End of radiation? My surgery was 2/25, and I consider that that's when I became cancer-free, so that may be when I mark it. And you'd better believe I'll celebrate.

Congrats all around for all the great results!! YAY!!! So glad to hear your good news ladies! Kbee, glad your mom's surgery went well...wishing her a smooth recovery!

Lynne, I'm 10 months post BMX without recon, and there is no normal breast sensation. There is still numbness/hypersenstivity across the surgical site, although its gotten better recently.......maybe all the B6, or maybe just natural healing. It was weird, at first I had "phantom" sensations....I felt like there were ice cubes on my nipples (which I don't have) and an occasional itch. That was odd but didn't last long!

Jen, my BMX was in Feb, and I've been wearing prosthetics since April. I have to pay a co-pay, but my insurance covered 2 pair initially, and will cover a new pair every 2 yrs. A couple months after BMX, the fitters suggested weighted foam ones until I had healed more. They are very lightweight, but don't move naturally and can feel cumbersome. After about 6 months, the fitters felt I was ready for silicone prosthesis. These are heavier, but fit nicely against the chest wall and feel/move more naturally. By the time I got the silicone ones, I had met my out of pocket for the year. I was glad because they are several hundred $ each and my copay would have been pricey. My insurance also covers 4 bras per year. Someone gave me some very lightweight (unweighted) foam inserts right after surgery, so I tried them before I got prosthesis.....I had problems with my bra riding up and the inserts ending up practically at my throat! I considered the knitted knockers, but after the inserts I decided to go for something more substantial. Another option is to check out breast cancer support groups. Our local group provides bras and prosthesis free of charge. Some are new, some are donated (used).

I don't plan to do recon either....I cant imagine more pain in my hypersensitive and tingly chest! I do want the dog ears removed tho....once I meet my out of pocket next year I'll think about it then.

I didn't gain on chemo, but picked up a few I can't shake during radiation.

Thanks! I have a cold. It sucks. I was thinking some nice Zumba would shake things loose, but reason has prevailed.

True, though I am trying to restrain my activity when I am presumably more full of white cells so I don't discover a horrible new way to develop LE. I will go tomorrow.

Ks- hope you feel better soon. Sux to be sick. Anytime. But this week? Ugh.

Jen- glad you found a way to feel better. And thanks for the reminder about the solstice. I needed that! Feeling like a hibernating bear lately!

Jack birdie- so try about hibernation. Now I realize what has been dragging me this month.

Littleblue...tense muscles, stress? Breathe

Ksusan- rest up and speedy recovery. Your comment about white blood cells reLly made think about all the things we need to build immunity

Anyone else taking Gabapentin? I've been taking it for over a month now, and I don't think it's doing anything but giving me the worst cotton mouth of my life. I had been told that it would take a while to take effect - whatever that means, but I don't think it's worth it due to the side effects. I'm just wondering if I can just quit it, or do you need to taper off or anything?

Lynne

Still good news, Scarlett!

I had a pre-MO appointment blood draw this morning (and an A1c since I'm consolidating my draws as much as possible). I see my MO next week, my PCP in 2 weeks, and have the last visit with the RO about that time as well. I will be dropping down to MO, PCP (who does my diabetes management), ND, PT/LET, and OB/GYN.

I have a few hours here to finish cleaning house and organizing before my SIL and MIL arrive for the holiday. I hope their visit will be calmer than my family's Thanksgiving trip, which was stressful. I have empathy for my mother's distress in having two daughters simultaneously in cancer treatment, but that didn't make her presence much of a pleasure.

My sister's radiation ends Monday. We have sent flowers to be delivered to her office (because cats would eat them at home). She's in the boosts now, and says she's just pink. I hope the two weeks afterward treat her well--that's when I had more pain.

Here's an okay shot of our tree:

I like having a tree, but even as a cultural Jew, it also makes me uneasy. For this reason I have several trayfe (unclean) ornaments as a demonstration to the universe that I know that the tree isn't kosher. Here's my current favorite (a gift from my sister):

Yes, that's Santa riding a pig. German Christmas culture supplies many of my pig-related ornaments. I also have lizards, shrimp, lobsters, shrimp sushi, and a glass cheeseburger.

When my poor wife is able to slow down and let me get into her photos, I'll post a little narrative about our vacation.

Be well, everyone.

When mine came back negative, I cried with relief--not so much for myself as for my sister.

Scarlett, mine came back negative too. I really wanted answers. I am glad for you, bit I know it does send you back to that questioning place...