Starting Chemo March 2015

Ugh, Carrie. The whole phone thing drives me nuts in general but that would put me over the edge. I can't imagine going to a family function and expecting someone else to watch my kids but I know it happens. My friends tells me her brother does it all the time.

Sharon: That sucks! I think when you are in treatment, you are just getting through treatment and you don't have time to even think about the fear of the future. Now you are forced to think about it just as you are getting done. I am sorry. I am going to be holding you in my heart and we are here for you. Don't ever say you are sorry for using us for that.

We had a pretty low key day but we cooked ALL day. It was supposed to be easy TG but we were working most of it. But that's ok. It took my mine off how uncomfortable and itchy I was. Thankfully, it was just us because while we are good cooks generally, we don't have much experience with TG. We cooked the turkey to the correct temp but the juices were pink so we ended up cooking about an extra 45 min and of course it was overdone. lol. I don't make mashed potatoes very often and haven't mastered that art either and by the time we ate it was 8 but oh well. My husband is a good sport about it and he cleans up the kitchen the whole time so that's nice.

Trying to get back to Jazzercise today. If you get 150 classes in the year, you get a tshirt and while I don't care about the tshirt, the accomplishment would mean a lot to me this year especially after being out for 6 weeks. I have 19 more classes or thereabouts to make it by year end.

Carrie, I am definitely planning to go to the meet up, whenever we can pull it off! And so looking forward to seeing everyone in person.

Day after thanksgiving, having hubby drop me off at local mall, because I love getting in all the madness and craziness.

Hugs to all!

Hello everyone! I struggled a bit with the holiday. Missing family no longer with us. I did my best but sort of scaled back. When my friend came over I got distracted and felt better. Tomorrow my niece comes for her makeup Thanksgiving turkey because she had to work. So my friend and I did a pork roast and I made a mince pie from scratch. My friend did most of the veggies. It was nice. My gravy even came out well with no lumps. Then we watched some tv and every holiday thing, even the commercials, are making me cry. I'm a soggy mess.

Carrie so sorry about the craziness.

And Sue- how very sweet of you to send one of your lovely creations to her. It's like magic that it arrived just when she needed to be reminded how special she is.

Sharon- we are with you. Waiting is awful, but I'm feeling good vibes it will turn out all right. I'm glad you are getting checked right away so you don't have to worry any more. You don't deserve this shit.

Glad everyone else had great days to reasonably good days. Here's a few pics from mine:

Oops, pie was a bit burnt, but tasty!

Haha! I was just thinking the Kleenex police are coming to arrest me for excessive weepiness. A short stay in a minimum security prison might "season" me a bit and add some cache to such a blog.

But only if Jack and Toots can come. But seriously, thanks. I really am struggling (combo of Tamoxifen, the holidays and cancerversary in two weeks) and I didn't do much. But what I did do turned out well and I think my mother would be proud I didn't give up altogether, as i was exceedingly tempted to do.

So here I am, hankyin hand, still seeking approval from my mother. Such a LOSER!

You are NOT a loser!!! You are awesome and you truly have been the "mama" of this group IMHO. You're mother would be very proud of you; I am sure of that. It's okay to miss her and feel very down right now. Holidays suck when we miss a loved one. Gentle hugs coming your way! Think of all you have accomplished in the last year. Sometimes I get all weepy when I start thinking about it. We are pretty bad ass ladies and we kicked cancer to the curb! I'm allowing my inner voice tell me that I'm awesome for surviving this shit!! Sure, I have aches, pains, no boobs and I'm currently sitting on my couch with a cool water bottle down my shirt where I used to have cleavage because of my rads(I think it's the rads) BUT I am here. Living. Not dying. Allow yourself to feel shitty. You will get back up because you don't give up. Our bodies and minds have been through hell. We are here for you and you have certainly had an impact in my life. Hang in there...HUGS again.

Katy, I miss my dad a lot at this time of year. I am wearing one of his shirts right now. I'm sure your mother would be proud of you, especially with the year you've had.

thanks Carrie, Allison, T and Ks- that was nice to read.

And Carrie, you made me smile, not cry. Thanks for that.

Sharon...I'm so sorry this is happening to you. Thinking positive thoughts for you that it turns out to be nothing.

Katy...I'm sorry that you've been feeling down. I understand the feeling of missing loved ones during the holidays and my cancerversary is coming up in the next few weeks too. I hope you're feeling better now, but if not come here and share with us, we are all here for you, just like you are always here for us. Hoping your Thanksgiving celebration today brings you some joy today.

PB

Ladies - I'm so sorry many of you are going through rough patches. Things have been wobbly over here emotionally. I was however proud of myself for not spending Thanksgiving crying. I had good friends all around. We got a bunch of snow & after dinner went tipsy sledding down the driveway. A perilous task as the drive way is very steep and very long. All of us got bruised up (just a little). Penny kept running to the top w/ us and chasing me and trying to remove my hat - or bite my head - not sure. She was very excited.

Back on Tamox - legs are achy, nights are sweaty. I see my onc on the 3rd, we'll see what she says.

Theresa! Let me know when you are going to Big Bear - or feel like going to Arrowhead! That would be so fun

Ks- it was a great day for the beach indeed! Love the pic. Miss your wildlife report that usually accompanies your trips out west though!

I'm ready!

Linda, it was a few days before I noticed. I've been on Magnesium for a few weeks. I haven't added the others. When I talk to my MO I'll discus pros/cons of switching meds and see what's what.

I am up for the lake anytime! We can also do multiple journeys. I love going there & am ready to go!

Sharon, I'm so sorry to hear of your recent concern, and so happy that my package arrived at this time so you know love is coming your way from all over the world. I hope it will serve as a good luck charm, and that your concerns are unwarranted.

Hugs,

Sue

🙏🏼