My mom is having surgery and is looking for opinions

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Twinkly_Toes
Twinkly_Toes Member Posts: 2
edited November 2015 in Surgery - Before, During, and After

My 71 year old mom was diagnosed last spring. The initial lump grew to the size of an orange-for 2 approx. years, her doctor kept reassuring her the lumps under women's arms almost never turn out to be anything. Sadly, the doctor was wrong-my mom went to a walk in clinic for another issue where that doctor told her it was more than likely to be cancer and to get it biopsied asap. It was Stage 2 and had spread to her lymph system by then. She just completed 6 weeks of chemo and is now facing surgery to remove the affect lymph nodes and one breast but...

She wants to have a double mastectomy. She isn't concerned about physical appearance, but very concerned about the cancer coming back later on down the road and she thinks if 1 breast is left, the cancer could return to that other one and the doctor did tell her it could, but he doesn't want to remove both because the other once is cancer free right now. She still has to have radiation and something called Bio Meds for a year. At this point, she is emaciated from the chemo and they are putting the surgery off for a few extra weeks so she can regain some strength and weight and she has time to make a decision. The doctor will remove both, but he really doesn't want to because he didn't think it's necessary at this point. She has said that if the cancer comes back, she isn't going through treatments again and wants to be as proactive as she can to prevent it. I was wondering if anyone can offer their opinion or where we can go to get some info about removing 1 breast vs. 2 and the chances it could come back in the healthy breast?

She was never told the name of the cancer she has, just that it is aggressive and lacks a hormonal component that most breast cancers have. I keep telling her to find out the name, but the chemo seems to be affecting her brain function to a degree (which I was told is normal). So I thought I would try searching myself to help her (she's not a computer person) but I haven't had much luck so far. Thank you.

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  • Free123
    Free123 Member Posts: 84
    edited November 2015

    Twinkly Toes, I'm so sorry you and your mom are facing this! Thankfully she has you to advocate for her- it sounds like she needs it. Obviously every dr is different but my breast cancer surgeon encouraged me to do a bilateral. Certainly if she is not overly concerned about her appearance and isn't having reconstruction why would she not do both? I understand her wish not to treat the other breast if cancer comes back to that healthy breast, so that is all the more reason to do a bilateral. There are stories on these boards of ladies having cancer recur in the other breast. I'm sure there are ladies that feel differently, but if she is not reconstructing, the mastectomy itself is do-able, especially when she regains some strength and weight. If you can, go with her to her next appointment and get her records so you'll have more info. Has she had an MRI to check out the other breast/lymph nodes?

    Wishing you both well and wisdom for this decision!

    Freeland

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited November 2015

    Hi Twinkly and welcome,

    We're sorry to hear about your mom, but happy she has you to advocate for her, as Free123 said.

    If you can get from her or her doctors her pathology report, you'll be able to understand a lot more about her diagnosis. And, the main Breastcancer.org site's section on Your Diagnosis can help walk you through what each piece of the puzzle means.

    We hope this helps and we're looking forward to hearing more about your mom's journey and her decision. Thank you for reaching out!

    --The Mods


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  • Twinkly_Toes
    Twinkly_Toes Member Posts: 2
    edited November 2015

    Thank you so much for your response. She hasn't had an MRI in her other breast-I will tell her to ask for that. It feels like they throw so much information at you, it's overwhelming...I will ask for her records at her next appointment. It seems like the doctors just kind of tell her what she needs to do and don't explain much and sometimes when they do, it's hard to understand.

    Her computer isn't working right now (she mainly uses it to play Book Worm anyway :)) but when we get her a new one, I am going to set her up to access these discussion boards. I think it would help greatly.

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  • Free123
    Free123 Member Posts: 84
    edited November 2015

    Sounds great, Twinkly Toes! It does sound like she may need someone at her appointments with her to ask questions and write down what is said. That's what I had to do- you think you'll remember but you are just so scattered when the dr is talking, it's unbelievable. I think she needs two sets of ears and eyes at her Dr visits.

    Blessings and prayers for you both!!

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited November 2015

    We agree, Twinkly! The info can definitely be overwhelming, especially when your mind is spinning with news of the diagnosis, medical terms, on top of the demands of daily life.

    Yes, please send your mom this way when you get her computer hooked up -- she will surely greatly benefit from meeting these incredible community members. She can ask any questions she'd like and will definitely get the answers -- and support -- she needs!

    Looking forward to "meeting" her!

    --The Mods

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  • Kicks
    Kicks Member Posts: 4,131
    edited November 2015

    Has she put you on written record (given concent) with her Drs for you to get her information? If she has, you can call her Drs and legally get information - if you are not listed - you can't legally be told anything without her present. I always make sure that Hubby and Son are recorded as being able to check my records IF they ever feel they need to.

    If she will let you read her copies of reports, you should be able to get information that is pertinent. This will you a better idea of what is actually going on and give you something to base questions to Drs on. Write down all questions and make a second copy to give to the Dr if you can be at an appt to get answers. It is also good to use your smart phone to record the appt so you can review what the Dr said later if needed to better understand.

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  • ChiSandy
    ChiSandy Member Posts: 12,133
    edited November 2015

    Contralateral breast cancer is a new primary tumor, not a recurrence of the cancer (nor metastasis) from the removed breast. Cancer doesn’t spread from one breast to the other.

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