new to group new diagnosed

Stepmish
Stepmish Member Posts: 7

Hi, at the beginning of October I felt a lump and went to the Dr. who sent me for a Mamo and Sono. A week later I was back to the radiologist for a biopsy. I was diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma I was told it was grade 1 and 2.5 cm. (I have not had a memo since 2011) and the could not tell me what stage until after the surgery. My breast surgeon was not sure if reconstruction was possible because where it is located. After meeting with the plastic surgeon I decided that a double mastecomy would be best. I was what I wanted all along. Surgery is scheduled for Tuesday Nov 17. People have been driving me crazy saying I should go for a second opinion so I did I went to Sloan Kettering. The doctor there said he would talk me out of the double mastectomy that I would do fine with a lumpectomy. I just feel in my heart that I would feel better with the mastectomy. I understand that there is a small chance of it coming back and that even with a double mastectomy it can still come back but in my heart i feel it is the right thing. But my husband and my mom kind of made me feel like I am going drastic when I don't need to. I feel like they can't completely understand since they have never been through this. Please tell me what made you decide what to do. Thanks Michelle

Comments

  • chrissyb
    chrissyb Member Posts: 16,818
    edited November 2015

    Hi Michelle and welcome.......sorry you need to be here but glad you found us.

    When it comes to deciding what treatment to follow each one of us is different in what we choose and why. I understand why your Mom and Husband are saying you are going a bit drastic wanting a double mastectomy but what they do not understand is the fear that comes with a dx of Breast Cancer and the life altering impact it has. Wanting to get rid of what is potentially two time bombs on your chest is quite normal and if that is what you really want then go for it as you will not be happy with not doing anything other.

    My best advice is to really give it all some deep thought and try not to let that fear influence your decision.......if you are still wanting the double mx then go ahead and have what you need to put your mind at ease.

    Wishing you all the very best.

    Love n hugs. Chrissy

  • sandcastle
    sandcastle Member Posts: 587
    edited November 2015

    Hello......I truly believe that when it comes to your Health....and right now you are in Shock....in the end it is really what you want....it is your Show.......in the end your loved ones should respect your wishes.......we all go through this in the beginning.....everyone wants to tell you what you Should Do......I had come to a point that I just had to say.....When you get Cancer...You can do it YOUR way......Good Luck....Liz

  • Sjacobs146
    Sjacobs146 Member Posts: 770
    edited November 2015

    I decided lumpectomy for two reasons, one is that I want to keep them as long as possible, the other is that a mastectomy is not a guarantee that it won't come back. IF I was going to take the step to have my breasts removed, I wanted 100% guarantee in exchange, and that is not the case. Once you lose them, you can't get them back, but after lumpectomy you can always go for mastectomy later if necessary.

    But as sandcastle said, it's your body, your show. You need to do what feels right in your heart and mind.

  • ChiSandy
    ChiSandy Member Posts: 12,133
    edited November 2015

    I chose lumpectomy for the same reason as sjacobs. First of all, I was diagnosed well into my 60s, have neither family history nor genetic mutations, and am not a fan of surgery. The more drastic the surgery, the longer on the table and the greater the risks of anesthesia and infection. (Speaking of infection, I’m also allergic to the three most commonly used classes of antibiotics). Recovery from lumpectomy is faster with fewer complications. Second, developing a contralateral cancer (i.e., opp. breast) is not very common--so getting a bmx without other predisposing factors is sort of like amputating both legs when only one has gangrene. Third, you can still have a recurrence or mets even after bmx. Fourth, when only one breast is affected, the tumor is small relative to breast size and in an opportune location, lumpectomy + radiation has the same survival rate as mastectomy. When I got diagnosed, my first thought was “I want it out NOW.” But I never thought to myself “I want to get rid of everything that could develop cancer.” That is why I haven’t had anything removed that was still perfectly healthy--you can get cancer in just about every organ.

  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited November 2015

    Welcome, Mish! We hate that you're here, too, but really glad you found us. As you can already see, our amazing Community is an incredible source of support, knowledge, and advice. Lots of great people here to help you navigate your diagnosis and treatment!

    Please keep us posted on what you decide and continue to ask questions -- we're all here to help!

    --The Mods

  • LisaAlissa
    LisaAlissa Member Posts: 1,092
    edited November 2015

    I'm so sorry that you're having to deal wlith all of this. And it's particularly hard when you and your support system aren't in agreement.

    There's a thread titled "BMX vs. lumpectomy--please help me understand" which includes very thoughtful discussions of why one might choose one over the other. The couple of posts from Beesie in this thread are particularly helpful in providing lists of consideration. They're also very clear that the decision that's right for you might not be the decision that's right for someone else.

    Take a look, but I'm wondering if reading that thread might be helpful for your husband and your mom to understand how you could reach the decision you have. But be sure to read it yourself first, so you're in a position to discuss it with them afterwards.

    Best wishes,

    LisaAlissa

  • sandcastle
    sandcastle Member Posts: 587
    edited November 2015

    Lisa....That is a GREAT idea.....the Decision is so very Personal.....no right or wrong way......If we all had a crystal ball we would know what way to go....Liz

  • Stepmish
    Stepmish Member Posts: 7
    edited November 2015

    Thanks everyone for your replies Lisa I am reading through that right now Thanks what a great topic. I knew everyone her would help because you understand .

    Michelle


Categories